Page 96 of From Now On

I’m honest. “Not the way that I should.”

That became glaringly obvious when I was in Calaveras. Rylan and Aidan…Harlow and Conor…that’show couples in love are supposed to act around each other. Ben and I were never like that.

Ben doesn’t bother to hide the hurt on his face. “And Rowan? You don’t care that it happened?”

I exhale. “You really want to know how I feel about it?”

He nods.

“I’m…relieved. I’m glad that you moved on.”

Ben sighs. “Fuck.”

He sounds resigned, not mad, but I still feel obligated to say, “You asked.”

“Yeah. I know I did.”

I take a sip of my coffee. The two girls at the table next to ours are whispering and looking toward the register, and I follow their gaze.

Harlow, Conor, and Hunter are standing in line.

Harlow and Conor are talking to each other.

Hunterwaslooking this way. He glances back at the chalkboard as soon as he realizes my head turned.

Fuck.

Last night, when I couldn’t fall asleep, I thought about what I’d say to Hunter if I ran into him on campus this week. Ask how the drive back went or how his shoulder is or if he’d decided about grad school. If that went well, suggest we hang out sometime.

IhopedI’d run into Hunter.

But Hunter showing up now, when I got roped into having coffee with my ex? Far from ideal.

Harlow glances this way a few seconds later. She smiles when she spots me, but it fades into a questioning look when she sees Ben seated across from me. She says something to Conor and then heads this way. Conor waves as Harlow weaves around tables. I wave back, and the two nosy girls whip their heads in my direction.

I forgot, when we were in California, that Conor is a campus celebrity.

But then I hear one of the girls whisper Hunter’s name, and realize maybe they were staring at a different hockey player. Unsurprisingly, that makes me feel about as great as picturing him with the pretty blonde cashier did. The pretty blonde cashier who’salsostaring at Hunter.

Harlow’s arrival distracts me.

“Saw you over here. Just wanted to say hi.” Harlow tucks a piece of hair behind one ear, raising her eyebrows at me before glancing at Ben. “Hey, Ben.” Her tone is cooler than it was when she was talking to me.

“Hi, Harlow.” Ben’s fingers tap nervously against the side of his coffee. “Good break?”

“Yeah, it was great. Yours?”

“Um, good, yeah.”

I snort. I can’t help it. Some of the shock is fading. Iamrelieved that Ben had sex with someone else. It’s ridiculous, because I don’t need his permission, but I feel like that gives me free rein to do the same, sans guilt.

I’m also…miffed. He tells me breaking up was a mistake right before leaving, and then hooks up with his childhood bestie? Talk about mixed messages.

Harlow hears the snort and shoots me a questioning look.

Later, I mouth at her.

She nods. “See you at home, E.”

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