Page 69 of Merry Little Midlife Matchmaker

“Just catching up with family and friends,” I said as we shook. “You must be looking forward to getting to Tahoe.”

“Snow’s supposed to be great this year.”

It was a perfectly pleasant conversation between two people who shared a slightly uncomfortable relationship. I had nothing against him, and usually at the Christmas handoff, I’d be glad to see him and Melody arrive. This year, I resented his presence more than I wanted to admit.

I nodded and glanced over my shoulder to see Mikey emerging from the house. I turned to Melody’s boyfriend andgave him another tight nod, then said my goodbyes and watched them all load up into the car and drive away. Mikey waved at me through the window, and I waved back with a big fake smile on my face. When I closed the door and stood in the silence of the house, the regret I’d felt earlier only got stronger.

Had I been a bad father to Mikey all these years?

And if things didn’t work out with Lizzie…was I just setting him up for an even bigger disappointment? What if Melody was right to be surprised? She knew me well, after all. What if her doubts about me were well-founded? Maybe this was a temporary reprieve, and I’d be back to hating the holidays next year.

Sighing, I shook my head. There was nothing I could do about it now. If I wanted to spend the holidays with Mikey in the future, that was something Melody and I would have to negotiate. Still, the house was too quiet and my thoughts were too loud.

And then my phone buzzed. I pulled it out of my pocket and immediately felt my shoulders soften.

Lizzie:Just dropped the kids off at their dad’s and feeling like drowning myself in a vat of mulled wine. Any chance you want to join?

Ten minutes later, Lizzie opened the door with red-rimmed eyes and a self-deprecating smile on her lips. “I don’t know why I still get emotional about this. It’s been years.”

I kicked the door closed behind me and wrapped my arms around her, inhaling the scent of warm spices and sugar that seemed to cling to her. Then I kissed her, and everything felt a little better.

“I didn’t want to let Mikey go with his mother,” I admitted. “I wanted to keep him for myself.”

Lizzie pulled away and stroked the edges of my stubble, where the prickly hair met my cheekbones. Her soft smile easedsome of the sharpness around my heart. “I know exactly how you feel. Every time I have to do a handoff for a special event, it feels like part of my heart goes with them.”

“They’ll be back soon.”

She nodded, swallowing thickly. “Yeah. And they deserve time with their other parent.”

“Yes.”

“But it sucks.”

“A lot,” I agreed. Water gathered on the lower rim of her eyes, and I kissed away the first tear that spilled. Then my lips moved to her mouth, and I lost myself in the feel and taste of her. She softened against me, her arms pulling me closer in a desperate movement, and I couldn’t help but kiss her harder.

“Silver lining,” I said between kisses, “is that now I get to do this with you.”

Her lips curled against mine. “Make me feel good, Sean,” she whispered.

“Always,” I promised. My limbs trembled as I framed her face with my hands, and without quite knowing how, we teleported to the bedroom and lost all our clothes along the way. Then we made each other feel better a few times over.

THIRTY-ONE

LIZZIE

My parents were hostingChristmas this year, and I arrived bright and early with bags of food and presents. I rang the doorbell and immediately pushed the door open, calling out a “Hello!” as I set my bags down in the foyer.

“In the kitchen!” my mother called back.

I kicked off my shoes and shed my jacket, then made my way toward her voice. I passed the living room along the way, where my dad and aunt were sitting beside the Christmas tree with glasses of eggnog in their hands. I greeted them with smiles and kisses, then headed on to the kitchen.

“Good, you’re early,” Mom said, wiping her forehead with the back of her wrist. “I’ve got the roast beef and ham prepped. You mind peeling potatoes while I work on a pie?”

“On it,” I replied, shoving some of the desserts and side dishes I’d prepped earlier into the fridge. I grabbed a dark-blue apron from the back of the pantry door, tied it around myself, and got to work.

“Have you spoken to the kids this morning?”

“Called them when I got up,” I replied. “Isaac got Hazel a new bike. Sparkly pink with streamers on the handles. She was overthe moon. Zach showed off his new baseball mitt and a computer game he’d been asking for.”

---