Page 54 of Second Chance with Seth

“Maybe,” I say, giving him the same answer I gave to Seth.

“Maybe is a lot better than no,” he says.

“I know, but we’ve still got a few things we need to work out.”

“Such as?”

“Helen Rogers,” I say through gritted teeth.

He frowns. “Who’s Helen Rogers? Do I know her?”

“Probably not. She doesn’t come in here.”

“Because you’d scratch her eyes out?” he says.

“I’d like to, given the chance.”

“What did she do?” he asks, folding his arms across his chest.

“She used to flirt with Seth.” I stop talking and shake my head. “What am I saying? She still flirts with Seth. She was doing it just yesterday morning, outside the hotel.”

“Okay,” he says, narrowing his eyes. “She’s on our hit list. But why is this something you need to work out with Seth? It’s not his fault if one of the local women thinks he’s irresistible.”

“I know, but the thing is, he knew what she was doing back then, and he did nothing to stop her. In fact, I think he used to enjoy it.”

“Oh,” he says, shaking his head. “That’s not so good.”

“I know. He gets that it was wrong, and he’s explained that he only let it happen because things weren’t right between us, and because I was shutting him out. I accept that, and Seth’s apologized, but…”

“But you’d like him to keep saying sorry forever? Is that it? Or maybe he should cut out his heart and hand it to you on a plate, to show how utterly desolate he is? Would that help?”

“No, of course not.”

“Then give the guy a break, will you? He made a mistake. You’ve made them, too, in case you haven’t noticed.”

“I have. I get that… but…”

“But what? You’re feeling insecure? You’re scared Helen Rogers is gonna flutter her eyelashes and he’ll go running to her?”

“Something like that.”

“Okay. You’ve helped me in the past. We both know that. So, can I point out the obvious?”

“I have a feeling you’re going to, anyway.”

“I am. It’s what friends are for.”

“Okay then… go on.”

“Seth left you.”

“I know.”

“But he didn’t go to her, did he? He had the chance, but he didn’t take it. He just left. And then he came back… to you. Not to her. To you. Accept it, Everly. It’s you he wants. It’s you he loves. Now, stop putting up barriers and let the guy make you happy again.”

At that precise moment, the door opens, and a customer walks in, which means I don’t get the chance to defend myself. I know Seth could have gone to Helen when he left. It was my worst nightmare both at the time and in the months since. The fact that he didn’t should have helped relieve my fears, but it didn’t, because I was too damn mad at him for leaving in the first place. Logical thought like that was beyond me. But the thing is, he’s back, and Owen’s right. I need to make the most of that… although I feel like I already am. Let’s face it, I wasn’t exactly putting up barriers when I asked Seth to kiss me, was I? I’ll admit I was a little doubtful about how he’d respond, but the moment his lips touched mine, it was like we’d gone back in time. He still made me breathless and weak at the knees, and he knew I’d need him to hold me up, just like he used to. The sparks were still there, undiminished by our separation, and maybe that was why I admitted how much I wanted him. It was good to know he wanted me too, although he didn’t have to say anything to make that clear. His needs were pretty damn obvious, and he didn’t hold back in letting me feel them… which was another reminder of how things used to be. Seth was always really demonstrative, and he clearly hasn’t changed a bit.

That one customer sparked an influx, and we’ve been rushed off our feet ever since. In a way, I’m not complaining. It’s meant I haven’t had time to think about Seth, or the occasional pang of fear that still drifts into my mind. I can’t seem to help them. Feeling insecure is a way of life for me. It’s part of my nature… something I’ve only ever felt I had under any kind of control when I was with Seth. I think Aunt Clare knew that, and I’ve always thought that was why she asked him to come and live here. It wasn’t just because she knew I loved him, or because it would be more convenient than him driving back and forth every weekend. It was because she knew he made me feel safe. Or he did until Helen Rogers came into our lives. I need to get over that, though. And I need to let him back in, so he can help me overcome my doubts and my fears.

---