Page 8 of Revved up & Ready

“But whois she?” I press.

“Her name’s Sadie.” He takes the frame from me, shoves it back in the box, and hands me the correct one. “Apparently, she has a shithead boyfriend in Oregon. Allie wants her to break up with him and move down here.”

Setting the box down, so I can grab the photo again, I sigh, “Yeah, so do I.”

Sadie

Six months ago,Voyeur Café’sgrand opening– Palm Springs, California

My reflection stares back at me from the glass front door ofVoyeur Café. This is it.

First day of a new chapter.

Turning over a new leaf.

A fresh start.

Starting with a fresh page?

Ablankpage.

A blankslate.

Picking a mantra shouldn’t be this hard.

Okay, no mantra.

I’ve got this—wait. Maybe that’s the mantra.

I’ve got this. I’ve got this. I’ve got this.

Devon and Allie have been encouraging me to break up with Jared for what feels like forever. It started with a late-night, “Are you sure you’re happy?” conversation when I was visiting, and turned into text messages every few days along the lines of, “Did you break up with that jackass yet?”

Being with Jared was comfortable, safe. So, I kept my head buried in the sand for an embarrassingly long time—not willing to admit what our relationship had become—not willing to face who he’d become.I’m ashamed that it took me so long to leave. I didn’t want to live through the pain of redefining myself without him.

We had a life together, a routine, the same friends—who I didn’t realize were backstabbers—and I couldn’t imagine anyotherlife for myself but one with him in Portland. I pushed everything else to the back of my mind for years—him slowly pulling away, doing more and more things withourfriends that didn’t involve me, refusing totalkabout marriage because—why aren’t you happy with our life now? Don’t I take good care of you already?

Itshouldhave been enough to break it off, but I wasn’t ready to let go until I found out he’d been sticking his dick in someone else—for months. Suddenly, creating a life without him was my only option.

So, I told him to fuck off and moved out the next day.

Not really. I wish it was that easy.

What Iactuallydid was yell and cry until my throat was raw for days after. The next morning, I went to the salon and had eight inches of my hair chopped off and the tips dyed pink.

Then, I made a thoughtful plan to move in with Devon in Palm Springs, which included two excruciating weeks sleeping in the guest room of the house Jared and I had shared for the last seven years. Now it’s time for the final step of my plan—actuallystartingmy new life.

I’ve got this.

Shouldering my way through the door with two gigantic roller bags, my eyes land on Cam Hacker. He’s straddling a barstool, arms slung across its back, andstaring straight at me. His eyes stay locked on mine as he leans forward and says something to Allie.

Her brows furrow, but then she spots me. “Holy shit!” she yells across the crowded bar, running all the way over to me and pulling me in for a tight hug. “Is that a fucking break-up haircut, Sadie Winslow?” she asks into my ear, still holding me tightly. “Did you finally leave that motherfucker?”

My lips curl into a triumphant smile. “Yeah. I left that motherfucker.”

She takes my suitcases and starts leading me back to her office, but Cam steps out to stop us when we pass the counter. He takes over the luggage, urging us to sit down and have a drink. Allie starts bickering with him about something, but I don’t hear it.

Does he remember me? No, why would he?That was six years ago.

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