Page 42 of The Road Sometimes Taken

As the car pulls up to the hotel, I open the door and help her step out, letting her walk in front of me. Stepping into the polished wood and comforting leather scent of the lobby, I guide us toward the elevators still in silence. The elevator ride is smooth but feels endless, with the biggest elephant in the room between us. Cara’s unease increases as we get closer and closer to our floor. We walk the worn carpets until we make it to our side-by-side rooms.

“This is me,” she whispers, pulling her hotel key from her purse.

“I know, I’m right there,” I add, pointing to my door.

Cara looks down, passing the hotel key between her fingers and avoiding my stare. I bring my hand to her chin, tilting it up so she can look at me but she doesn’t. Her face is toward me but her eyes are everywhere but on me.

“Cara, bebé, don’t hide from me,” I sooth, getting her to look at me with the prettiest green eyes.

“I’m not hiding, I’m just… can we just forget that happened?” she asks.Forget? She wants to forget?

I let out a sound, a mix between a scoff and a laugh. When her eyebrows frown I say, “I’m pretty sure it will be impossible for me to forget that kiss, sunshine.”

I drop her chin, fighting the urge to touch her as she lets out a sigh. “I don’t have the brain capacity to deal with this right now, okay? Let’s just forget it for the moment. Grab that memory, put it in your pocket, lock it, and throw away the key,” she says, bringing her index finger and thumb together and twisting them in the air as if turning a key.

I take a step toward her, and she takes a step back, and we repeat the movement until her back is against the door. I bringmy arm up, placing my hand next to her face, caging her in with my body and dropping my face to her forehead.

“You can try and pretend it didn’t happen, but I know you know better. That kiss?” I say, smacking my lips together, my voice going deep. “That kiss was not one you easily forget. It was a kiss you crave, knowing one could never be enough. I’ll let you live in denial for tonight. Tomorrow though? I want to talk,” I add, before kissing her on her forehead, grabbing her hotel key from her hand and sliding her door open after the beep.

“Go ahead and try to erase that kiss from your mind, sunshine. I dare you to try. I’ll be here waiting for you to tell me when you can’t.”

She steps backward into her room, eyes wide and breathing slowing as she closes the door without saying a word.

This is the main reason I didn’t want to kiss her. Not that I haven’t thought about it a million times. Even joked around with my friend that I was going to marry her someday, but the truth is that she’s always been out of reach. First because I was the annoying little brother, then there was the jackass ex-boyfriend, and now, well—I’ve been trying to avoid this exact spiral. In what world does she think she can walk around being the complete ray of sunshine she is without people falling heads over heels for her? In what realm does she think that one can look at her beautiful rosy lips and not want to kiss them?

I walk back to my room, taking the coldest shower known to man, before lying in bed. Tomorrow will be another day. We’ll talk about whatever that was and we will figure it out. I’m not expecting her to just say she wants anything serious with me—nobody really does. They’re just in it for the money and maybe the way I look and since that’s not Cara’s vibe, I’m sure the kiss was more of a lapse in judgment. One thing’s for sure, I need to makesure she understands that nothing about that kiss was pity. Not one ounce was unwanted. I wanted it. I wanted her. I’ve wanted her for so long and I’m not sure how I’ll let her know.

Allielicious: What did you do?

I readAllie’s text that came through at 7:00am. I wait, expecting more info, but no others appeared. Allie usually texts in a series of explosive messages, one rapid fire after the other. This one. Came alone. No follow up, no explanation, no details.

Me: More details would be fantastic, sis.

Allielicious: Cara’s spiraling. What did you do?

Me: Rude of you to assume I did anything.

Me: Have you actually talked to Cara or are you just assuming?

Allielicious: She sent an SOS text but has not replied. Not like her. Whatever you did, fix it.

Me: I didn’t do anything!

Allielicious: Then go check on her

Allielicious: and tell her to call me

I go to put the phone down but as soon as Allie’s texts stop, a phone call comes through.Gusti.I hit the green button, answering the video call and bringing my arm behindmy head to rest. As I’m holding the phone I play with Cara’s bracelet, just thinking about all these little moments we’ve lived together the past few days and how happy they’ve made me. Happier than I’ve been in years.

“Keloke, manin?1,” Gus says but I can’t see him, hidden between the shadows behind the darkness in the room he’s in.

“Are you done playing house yet?” he asks, a smirk dancing across his face, his tone light and playful. But what he doesn't understand is that there was nothing pretend about it for me. I wish I was playing house with her. Damn, I’m ready to buy the damn neighborhood if that would get her to stay with me forever.

“No, Gus. I’m not playing house. That’s not what I’m doing here. I’m on a trip with Cara, and I’ll be home in less than two weeks. I’ll be back to real life.”

His eyebrows raised skeptically. “Are you liking it, though?”

“Actually, I am.” I pause, reflecting on how long it’s been since I truly enjoyed my time away from everything. I try to remember the last moment I could be present, doing anything other than work. It dawns on me that it might have been back in high school. Even then, it was hard to focus on what I wanted because there was always something else demanding my attention—homework, extra classes, advanced Spanish in the afternoons, and even trying to keep up with my friends. Many kids hate school but for me, school was a refuge. It was the one place where my only responsibility was to finish my assignments and be done with them. High school allowed me to pursue something for myself, and while I did have to maintain good grades, it felt good to concentrate on something I genuinely wanted to do.

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