Page 43 of The Road Sometimes Taken

The bar was high at home. And havingAllie as a sister didn’t make it any easier. She could finish her homework on the ride home and have the rest of her evening free, while I had to study for hours to keep up. I worked hard for my grades, which taught me a lot about self-discipline and perseverance. However, it also made schoolwork feel like a chore, like something else on my to do list to please my parents. At school though? I thrived.

“You enjoy spending time there?” I want to answer his question honestly, but just then, a flash of movement catches my eye behind him. He frowns, noticing something on his phone, and immediately mutters, “Shit.”

“Have some company?” I tease. It’s unusual for him to have people over, especially this early in the morning but he also seems to be somewhere else, not at his main home. He rarely has girls sleepover; he’s more of a casual dater, like me I suppose.

“Yeah, let me call you back, okay? Good luck with the outdoors and… whatever.” He hangs up the phone abruptly, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

The day is bright ahead of me. I change into workout clothes, leave the hotel room, and hit the gym. I haven’t exercised since the trip began, which isn’t a big deal with how much hiking and walking we’ve done. I still feel restless and the best way to clear my head is sweating. Especially since I can’t stop thinking about Cara and how I’m going to resist kissing her again—when I can’t stop remembering how her lips felt against mine and how she fit perfectly in my arms.

The run was exactlywhat I needed. There’s nothing like listening to my favorite music while getting my heart rate up. I told Cara I’d check with her around ten, since she mentioned wanting to sleep in. I want to respect her space, but my mind is unraveling wondering what is going on in her head. I know she’s probably spiraling about our kiss and I do need to bring it up at some point so Allie doesn’t kill me. She might be losing it, but I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that she kissed me. She wanted to kissme.

I’m giddy at the possibility of this becoming more—or at least, of her letting me in her heart a little bit more. After having that conversation with both Allie and Gus, I actually realize how much I’m enjoying this trip and how I think about work less and less every day. That’s never been possible before and I kind of like it—a lot. There are so many memories of good times but very little are actually in adulthood, most of them are from when I was young and coincidentally, Cara is in most of them too.

I can’t shake the memory of the first time Cara showed me her heart. I was five and she was seven, and we were running around inside the house during one of our family vacations. Our families stayed in touch over the years, often vacationing together, whether at busy amusement parks or quiet beach houses. My favorite memories were the times we spent at the lake, playing games, and enjoying family time. There was this one beach house I vividly remember because it was the first time I felt seen and I was just a little boy. Our moms set up an ice cream bar at the kitchen table and yelled for us to come inside.

Cara had been swimming for what felt like hours, and so was I, but at five years old, who could keep track of time? I bumped into her when she ran inside the house, and fell to the ground, trying my hardest not to cry. My parents had alwaystold me to be tough, not to cry—to be a rock so I kept repeating those words over and over in my head.

Cara, however, looked at me like I was a fragile little thing. She looked so apologetic, and said, “Oh no! I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” She gave me a big hug and when I sniffled, she told me, “It’s okay to cry if I hurt you or scared you. It’s okay, Manny.” Her angelic voice and the sincerity of her concern left an imprint on my heart.

We were just kids, and it was an accident, but that moment marked the beginning of something special. That entire interaction helped me understand that it was okay to have big feelings and to express them if needed. I could tell even then that I was drawn to her glow, and I always knew that my life would be intertwined with hers in some way. Even if it was from afar as I watched her glow. Except now I’m not sure she was actually as happy as she let on.

I walk up the stairs, bypassing the elevator entirely, still needing the physical effort to ground myself. Making my way up, I mentally prepared to check on her—wondering if she needs anything, if she’s eaten today, and to check on our schedule for the rest of the day.

My skin is slick with sweat, and I wipe my forehead as I approach Cara’s door. Just as I raise my hand to knock, I hesitate. I hear faint sounds from inside. At first I think she’s hurt but then I hear it—a soft, unmistakable moan. My heart races, and I can’t help but feel like that sound is rooted deep within my soul. It’s not a sound of pain but one of pleasure, and I know it’s wrong to stand out here, listening to whatever is unfolding behind that door.

Yet, a primal part of me wonders—is she touching herself, lost in thoughts of me? Is she thinking about what could’ve happened last night? Is she thinking about our kiss? The idea sends a jolt through me, and my entire body reacts to thosesweet sounds cementing the fact that we’re both so in tune with her, my dick and I of course. I stand frozen in place, caught between wanting to respect her privacy and the overwhelming urge to know what is happening inside. But before I can hear more, I make myself walk away and into my room to take another cold shower and leave her alone in her private moment.

1 It’s a colloquial way of saying Hi brother in the Dominican Republic

21

LIKE A MILLION BUCKS

RECKLESS DRIVING, LIZZY MCALPINE FT. BEN KESSLER

Cara

Yesterday is a damn blur.From the bourbon tasting and people giving Manny and me compliments about our relationship, to the party, the closeness between us, and the kiss. The perfect kiss. I’m a good kisser, or I thought I was, butthatkiss is making me question if I’ve ever even been kissed right my whole life. I never knew a kiss could not only touch your lips but reach your soul. Set your senses to overdrive and give you sensations only described in movies. Just one kiss and I’ll never be the same again. Where’s the new bracelet for that? The one that will help me remind me of that feeling.

My mind has been in overdrive since last night, reading between the lines and overthinking all the scenarios. All the what-ifs dancing in my mind and my body—well, my damn body. The slightest touch from Manny and my skin is on fire. He looks at me with his stupid smile and his backward hat, and I get goosebumps. And his damn cologne or soap or whatever itis that makes him smell spicy, woodsy and manly has me sizzling. Add the kiss to the equation and my body doesn’t know what to do.

We’re supposed to get ready to go to Nashville. My number one stop on this trip. I can’t wait to dance my heart out and to listen to live music for days on end. We rented a B&B because we wanted to take our time. I’ve been so excited to finally get there, but instead of rushing out the door to leave, I’m here sitting on my hotel bed, wrapped in a towel, hot and bothered. My body is begging for relief and I might just give in. I think I have to if I want any chance at enjoying my day without jumping on Manny the minute I see him.

I search my bag for the beige pouch I keep at the bottom. A little pouch that holds a girl’s best friend. This one, particularly, is my favorite. It’s small and pink but damn powerful. I got it because it’s supposed to be amazing for couples but when I brought it up with Cole, he got all defensive and asked me if his dick wasn’t enough—so I hid it. I’m also not going to bring a toy out with random hookups or with guys after a date or two, so I mostly use it by myself and I fucking love it. It has a small part that sits on my clit while I reach the perfect spot. I get goosebumps just by thinking about how good I’m about to feel.?

I lay back on the bed, unwrapping the towel and touching my pebbled nipples. I close my eyes and get lost in the feel of my cold hands against them. The contrast of the warmth of my breasts against the chill of my fingers sends shivers down my spine. I touch one softly, drawing circles against my skin with one hand and lowering my other until I reach the spot that has been dying for attention. I rest my feet on the edge of the bed, dropping my knees. My fingers trace between my folds; sliding through them, I touch my needy clit which is ready to be teased. I circle it a few times while I pinch my nipple and moan, filling the room with the most indecent sounds. Soundsof pleasure and satisfaction; what better sounds are there? I can feel my arousal building, so I grab the vibrator, turn it on and slide it in gently, adjusting until it hits the right spot.

“Jesus,” I whisper to no one, but this feels so good, I can’t keep in words or sounds. I bite my lip, at the same time that I squeeze around the toy. I squeeze as I rock my pelvis in circles as I let the pressure and the vibrations touch my most sensitive parts and reach all my pleasure points. I continue to motion, chasing the high. I know it won’t take long because I’ve been on the edge for far too long.

After licking my lips and letting out a guttural moan, I explode around the toy, squeezing it tightly with my inner muscles and turning my face on the bed, screaming a loud and borderline obsceneyes. I let myself come down from the high, shaking my head at the fact that I just made myself come so fucking hard thinking about Manny’s face between my legs.I’m in so much trouble.

I clean up,put some makeup on, and play country music so I can get in the groove. I start swaying as I sing with Kelsea Ballerini, putting on jean shorts and a loose spaghetti-strap shirt. I decide to go braless because it’s too damn hot for anything else and grab my tennis shoes. Space buns pin up the front of my hair with the rest in messy waves down my back and when I look at myself in the mirror, I feel like a million bucks. I’m hot and I just orgasmed, nothing can sour my mood today. I just have to avoid talking about the kiss and everything will be fine.

I walk toward the door and when I pull it open, Manny’sstanding there, coffee in hand with troubled eyes. He has dark jeans on and a button-down olive green shirt that makes his features pop. His skin practically glows in contrast with the color of the shirt and his soft curls are unruly as if he passed his hand through them.

“Well, hello, Manny. Personal space?” I ask, trying to go past him but he keeps staring at me, so hard I look down to make sure I did actually put clothes on and I’m not out here embarrassing myself. “Mmmm, hello?”

He swallows, his Adam’s apple bobbing down and he hands me the coffee. “Here, cafecito para ti?1.”

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