Page 63 of I'll Carry You

She hugged her legs to her chest, setting her face on the tops of her knees. Before Colby was even born. He hadn’t even made it to his son’s birth.

This whole time, she’d been furious with a man who was dead.

He would never come back. Was never going to be a part of his son’s life.

She’d mourned Kevin years before when he’d left. But this...

A crushing pain gripped her heart. She’d loved him so much. She didn’t stop the tears. Her shoulders shuddered with broken sobs.

The bench creaked as Jason sat beside her. She didn’t fight him as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. Much as she was angry with Jason, her head was spinning from all the shocks to her system at once. Her feet slid off the bench, and she buried her face against his coat, breathing in his scent, which had felt so familiar and comforting just minutes before.

She’d tried to do her best to learn more about him, and he’d hidden the most important thing she needed to know. Jen clenched her jaw. Jason had slept with her knowing all this about her, while she knew nothing.

Her hurt was difficult to process, to understand. A gust of icy wind sent the bare branches of the trees scraping against the stone of the buildings beside them. The air dried the icy trails of tears on her cheeks. The desire to know more about what had happened to Kevin consumed every other emotion.

“I was afraid—” Her voice filled with tears. “I was afraid that he’d gone back to using.” She sniffled, wiping her nose with her sleeve. “He just seemed sodifferent from any of the guys I knew around here. Didn’t know a thing about fixing cars.” She chuckled softly. “But we could go to museums and get lost in them for hours. He was the only person I’d ever met who would stop at the historic signs—you know, the ones on the side of the road that tell you about the important stuff that’s happened there?”

“Did he ever talk about his family?” Jason leaned back against the back of the bench, his arm still around her.

“Not really.” Jen cleared her throat. “He would just get really sad and close up entirely when I asked about it. He said something about his dad drowning, though.” She winced, immediately remembering Jason’s dislike of water.No wonder.“I mean,your dad. Sorry, I probably shouldn’t bring it up.”

Jason looked away as though willing himself not to think about it. He got to his feet. “Yeah. That was a long time ago.” He held out his hand to her. “I know you probably don’t want to be around me, but if you’d like to talk...can we continue it inside somewhere? You’re shivering.” Then he added with a pleading expression, “Please.”

She stared at his hand, her anger at him flowing back to him now that the shock about Kevin had ebbed. She shouldn’t have let him comfort her. Not after the way he’d lied to her. “Did you know who I was when you met me?”

“Yes.” Jason put his hands in his pockets.

The succinctness of his response felt honest but only made her eyes narrow as she remembered her fears about stalking her. “Then you actually were following me?”

“No.” Jason drew a sharp breath through his nose as though affected by the cold. “I just kept running into you. I didn’t come into Brandywood to meet you. I only found out about you and Colby the day before I came into town, and my goal was to talk to Mildred.”

She stood and lifted her chin. “And somehow, instead, you conveniently found and flirted with me—and then fucked me? Even though you knew I didn’t know Kevin was dead. Even though you were basically lying to me about who you were.”

“Jen . . .” Jason took her hand, but she yanked herself free from his grip.

“Don’t you dare touch me.” Jen glared at him. “The thing is, this whole time I’ve been questioning myself since I met you. But maybe being cautious and waiting for someone who actually deserves my limited time wasn’t the world’s worst plan.” She backed away, ready to flee. Her teeth chattered, almost more from emotion than from cold. “Do me a favor, will you? Stay away from Colby and me.”

ChapterTwenty-One

The doorto Mildred’s house swung open, and Jason crossed his arms as she peered out from behind the door. “What are you doing here?” Mildred asked. Her white hair was set in pink foam curlers, and she wore a nightgown as though she’d been in bed.

Jason let out an exasperated sigh. “What in the hell do you think I’m doing here? I just spent the last forty-five minutes trying to find out what happened to you. You were gone from the Depot when I went back, and then I checked the hospital and swung by the police station to find Dan Klein—”

“I’m flattered. Sounds like you were worried about me.” She winked. “But I’m just fine, honey. Thanks for checking. Good night.”

She started to shut the door, but Jason shoved the toe of his shoe in the doorway before she could, wedging his way closer to her. “Shouldn’t you be in the hospital?”

Mildred scrutinized his expression, a faint smolder of surprise in her eyes. “You don’t really care, do you?”

“I . . .”

The thing was, he hadn’t even really considered that possibility. When he and Jen had gone their separate ways after that disastrous conversation, the only other thing he’d been able to focus on was finding Mildred. His shoulders loosened. “I care, Mildred. You scared me back there.”

“It was all part of the plan, sonny. I’m in perfect health. How’d it go with Jen?” Mildred gave him a bright grin.

She pretended to be sick?

Dumbfounded, Jason stepped back. His arms flexed as he set his hands on the back of his neck. “Are you serious?” A bristle of annoyance replaced his surprise. “Do you have any idea what you did? Jen is furious with me. And I had to tell her about Kevin being dead. She said she never wants to speak to me again.”

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