Page 76 of Lessons with the Mothman

CHAPTER 25

Victoria

What am I doing here?I stood at the end of the block, but Nightlight's glow was visible from here, warming the sidewalk, shadows of figures shifting and fading into one another.

What is the goal? What will I say?

Because I missed Elias.

I missed him, and I wanted to drag him in front of me to yell at him all over again, because my mom had been dropping little hints and questions about Elias ever since he'd appeared at the bridal shop.

Because I hadn't told her anything. Not that he was a fling. Not that he was helping me with my study. Not that he was no one.

Elias wasn'tno oneto me.

Which I supposed was my answer to why I was standing just out of sight of Nightlight, arguing with myself about whether or not to walk in. To demand an explanation…and maybe also to apologize.

Just a few steps… All I had to do was take a few more steps, peek through the window.

And then…

What?DateElias? Why was that such a terrifying thought?

I swallowed as the door opened, light and sound spilling out, and turned my back on the bar, shrinking a little closer to the corner of the alley to let the flow of Wicker Park traffic sweep past me.

Sex with Elias was simple. Well, no, it was fucking spectacular. It was everything I'd ever wanted, been too afraid of or discouraged from asking for. ButEliaswas even more than that. He was smart and curious and intuitive. He was as interested in me as I was in him, not in the usual way of attraction, but at a deep "how does this person tick and what drives their choices?" level. I knew that hadn't been an act. That was who Elias was.

"Victoria?"

I startled, looking up and finding an unexpected face in front of me. "Hannah!"

The shadow behind her grew in size and then burst into a smile, dark wings spreading to shield us from the street. "Hey, Victoria! Looking for Elias?" Rafe greeted, one arm slung over his mate's shoulder.

I froze and the pair stared back at me, a subtle twitch of Hannah's elbow into Rafe's side, his face going slack with surprise and then recovering with a sheepish grin.

"I was trying to find him, 'cause the venue for my dinner club just dropped out on me, but he's not at the bar," Rafe hastened to add.

I blinked, glancing down the sidewalk, my shoulders dropping. "Oh. Umm… Yeah, I came to see if he was around."

"I told Rafe we should text him first, but—" Hannah started.

"I like the urgency of bursting into the bar without warning. Keeps the old man on his wings," Rafe said.

I smiled at that. "You could always surprise him at home," I suggested.

Rafe snorted, but Hannah tipped her head in curiosity, a sharp light arriving in her eyes. "Have you been to Elias's house?"

"Of cour—" I paused as Rafe and Hannah both leaned in, the same intense focus in their gazes, and then recalled what he'd told me during his mating season. None of his friends had ever been to the house. "That's unusual, I take it," I said, pretending not to already know the answer.

Hannah relaxed and shrugged. "I've never been, but I'm still new to the crew."

Rafe shook his head. "I know it's nearby. And to be fair, he'd never been to my old place. I just assumed it was too tight for us all to have dinner there. Moth cozy, you know?"

Normally, I had a lock on my expression. But it had been a month made for fraying me at the edges, and I knew I was failing to hide my reaction from them.

"Told you," Hannah said to Rafe, nudging him lightly in the side. "He's ostentatious."

"It's not… He's more—" I swallowed hard and shook my head, pausing at the corner, staring blankly into the cars that turned around us.

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