Page 55 of Inevitable

I look over to him and for once I don’t let my smile fade. “I fucking love her so much, brother. She has always been it for me.”

“I know what that’s like,” he says softly.

I rest my hand on his shoulder and squeeze. “You know Gio, Isabelle would want you to move on. She would want you to be happy, she would want Alessandro to have a mom.”

“He has a mom,” Gio snaps. “An incredible one that gave her life for his.”

“I know,” I say as I raise my hands up. “I am just saying if you ever did want to give a woman a real shot, I know it is what Izzy would have wanted.”

Gio closes his eyes before he shakes his head and goes to pour another drink. Guess that closes that subject. It kills me to see him like this, mainly because I feel responsible. It was me that declared war against the Chernoff’s. It was me that had Gio go on the stakeout where they followed him and found his house. He has never admitted that he blamed me, but I know if the roles were reversed I sure as hell would have blamed him.

Once dinner is served, we all sit down and quietly and eat our dinner. Well, the adults do, Alessandro ends up wearing more than he eats. Ashlynn laughs as she watches him and helps wipe his face off. She would be such a good mother.

“So, Ashlynn,” Gio interrupts my thoughts as he turns to her. “Luc here won’t budge so I figured I should ask you. What’s the story between you two? I know that his family got kicked out of your house but what all went down that led to you not seeing each other for all of these years?”

I send daggers at the side of his head, but he seems to be completely content with ignoring me.

“My father found out about us and fired the Marianos. There really was no choice-”

“I should have chosen her,” I interject. “I thought I wasn’t good enough for her. I thought I was going the right thing by letting her go.”

She smiles and shakes her head. “You did the right thing at the time, no matter how angry I was with you over it. I was 16, there wasn’t anything we could have done.”

“But what about when you turned 18? Why didn’t Luc come for you then?” Gio asks her while he looks at me.

“Because you of all people know the price you can pay for living this life with someone you love,” I say.

Gio gives me a look that holds an incredible amount of anger. Anger at me or the situation I am not sure. He nods and we eat the rest of the meal in silence. I feel like the tension between Gio and I has only gotten worse over the years. When we are working it never comes out, but when we hangout like this it seems to be the only thing that shows.

Once we are finished with dinner Alessandro comes bounding up to me excitedly. “Uncy Luc, piggy ride?”

I let out an exaggerated sigh before I smile and bend over for him to climb on. He jumps on me so quick he almost knocks us both over. As I am galloping through the house with a squealing toddler on my back, I catch a twinkle in Ashlynn’s eyes as she watches us, I toss her a wink and continue playing with Alessandro.

The rest of the night is spent telling Ashlynn stories about Gio and I in our earlier days. We laugh and joke and for a little while I almost forget. I almost forget about our enemies lurking in the darkness and enjoy life as is. It is so tempting to want a simpler life, one away from the family. At the end of the day, I know that that is not the type of life that I was destined to live.

Once they leave, Ashlynn and I decide to make our way up to our room. I come up behind her kissing her neck and slowly start peeling off her clothes. She stretches her neck to give me more access and sighs.

“You were so sweet with Alessandro today,” she says. I smile against her bare shoulder.

“I love that little guy too much for my own good.”

“It shows,” she chuckles. “I never imagined you could be good with kids.”

I nod my head. It is a bit of a contradiction. “I always wanted a big family, until I became Boss.”

“And now?” She inquires her head tilted to show she is listening intently.

“And now I think it would be completely selfish of me to want such things and bring innocent children into my world. It’s bad enough I have drug you into it and I am too selfish to let you go. I couldn’t do that to a child.”

“So, you don’t want kids? Ever?” I hear the hint of disappointment in her voice, I know we use to dream of starting a family together and I am sure that is what she still had in mind. I give her a sad smile.

“I want kids terribly. But the more loved ones I have the bigger target I paint on mine and their backs.”

She nods but stays quiet before she slips away to the bathroom. I let her have her space, I know that I am now asking even more of her than before. To give up a life with children, to never be a mother. God, I know she would be fantastic, might even rival my own. I guess this is what she means by the things that she really wants are things that money can’t buy. I wish more than anything I could give her everything.

Chapter Twenty

Ashlynn

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