Page 35 of (Un)Spoken

Alex came up behind Cole, rubbing her hands along his back. “Everything looks great, baby. She’s going to love it.”

“I hope so,” he muttered, pulling her to his side. “I just want them to be comfortable.”

“How could they not be?” I chuckled, walking around the space one more time. “You’ve done everything to make sure they’ll love it. And knowing Victoria, the best thing you can do is let her and Emilia make it their own, even if it’s just for a short time.”

Alex shot me a look that made me uneasy, as if she could feel the weight of my words. Even if I tried to play it off, Cole wasn’t the only nervous one. Victoria and I had talked every day since we left Texas, but my nerves were quickly fraying. I was dying to see her again without a screen in front of us. I wanted to do a whole lot more than that, if I was being honest. And while I loved getting to know her better, I was spending more time with my lefthand than ever before. Shit, was she feeling this too? Was she craving my touch as much as I did hers? With every stroke of my hand, I imagined it was hers, dreaming up her mouth taking my cock. Fuck. I shifted, trying to hide my thoughts from my friends. How the fuck did this girl do this to me? She wasn’t even in the same state, and I was hard as a rock just thinking about her.

However, as much as I wanted her, I also wanted so much more. She was sweet, kind, and so bright, it scared me. She’d shown me some of her school assignments, and the way her brain worked out problems amazed me. But with every step we took forward, it felt like it still wasn’t enough. Even though I had spelled out my intentions to her, she was still playing things close to the chest, and I had no idea what was going through her mind.

Pulling myself out of that thought spiral, I glanced at my watch. “Shit, I gotta head out. I’m supposed to meet with Dr. Kedir in half an hour.”

“How’s that going?” Cole asked.

Even though I hadn’t told them the reasons behind my therapy appointments, I was open about the fact that I was going, at least with them. They’d been my biggest supporters for months, encouraging me to seek help when the thoughts in my head got too loud. And maybe one day, I’d explain the whole situation, but not today.

“It’s going well,” I said. “Doc’s helping me work through my block with acting, and she seems hopeful I’ll be able to get back to it soon.”

“Good.” Cole nodded. “I’m glad to hear you’re not giving it up for good.”

“And stop gracing the world with this handsome face?” I smirked. “Not a chance.”

Alex rolled her eyes and came to my side. “C’mon, ego-maniac. I’ll walk you out.”

We walked down the steps in silence, Alex waiting until we got outside to speak. She looked up at me with an open expression, one that had only started when Cole came into her life. While I always admired Alex’s strength, it was no secret that she hid behind iron-reinforced walls. Only after letting herself fall in love did they start to fade away with everyone else as well.

“I’m worried about you, Adam.”

My jaw tensed, and I hated she could see through my false smile. “There's no reason to be, I promise. I’m doing better.”

She crossed her arms around her chest, leaning against the wooden support on the side of the porch. “I know you are, and for what it’s worth, I’m really proud of you for taking these steps.”

“But?”

“But…” She sighed. “This thing with Victoria is complicated.”

I shook my head, “Nothing is going on. I’m just happy she’s coming to visit Cole.”

“Don’t bullshit me, Rice,” she laughed. “We both know you did not spend hours painting purple walls because it would makeColehappy. I’ve seen the way you two look at each other; it’s clear there’s something there.”

I clenched my teeth, already knowing where this was going. “Look, if you’re afraid I’m going to hurt her?—”

“I’m worried aboutyou.”

My eyes snapped to her, reading the concern written in her own. Alex continued, “I like Victoria, and I think you two could be really good together, but you have to admit, this is complicated.”

“And?”

“And I’m not saying don’t go for it. God knows if anyone deserves to be happy, it’s you. But just promise me you’ll take your time. I don’t want you to be hurt when she goes back home, and there are more hearts at stake than just yours and hers.” She placed her hand on my arm. “Make sure this is what you really want before diving into the deep end.”

As Alex went back inside, I stayed on the porch. I needed to leave if I wanted to get to the other side of town in time, but her words stilled my steps. As much as it pained me to say it, Alex was right. I was willingly free-falling into this girl, and there was so much more at stake than just me.

And I started to doubt I was worth the risk.

Even after settlingin at Dr. Kedir’s office, Alex’s words still echoed in my mind. The entire drive over here, I’d run through every scenario, wondering if it was a mistake to bring Victoria into my world. It was unpredictable and often unstable. I was lucky I’d had some success and made enough investments to keep me going, but how long would it last? Acting was my only true career, and now, I wasn’t even doing that. Even without that, my dating reputation would always be a red flag. Was that why she was holding back? I tried to explain the media’s commentary, but what if it wasn’t enough for her? If you looked at my track record, I wasn’t a safe bet, not for a mom with a kid to think about.

Dr. Kedir shuffled in her chair. “Anything you want to talk about today, Adam?”

I leaned forward, elbows on my knees. My legs shook restlessly, unable to quiet the doubts in my mind. “I decidedto take your advice. I spent more time with Victoria and talked to her about what’s been going on. And we…” I scoffed. “We kissed before she left.”