Page 133 of Curveball

When Quincy gets home, whether Kaya’s awake or not, he usually wakes her, feeds her, and dances with her. No matter where he starts the night, I always wake up with him in my bed. Each night, we get a little more handsy.

Quincy is now on his road trip. He constantly FaceTimes me so he can see Kaya. I think he’s already struggling being away from her.From us.

I’m finishing up pitching for the day. Mom heads upstairs for a shower, leaving Arizona and me alone.

I’m feeding Kaya, looking into her gorgeous little face.

Arizona practically melts at us. “You’re such a natural with her.”

“You should see your brother with her. He’s totally smitten. Can’t get enough of this little one. When he dances with her every night, I just about lose it. It’s so sweet.”

“How are things with you two?”

I shrug. “I’m not sure. He’s been a hundred percent devoted to us. He does and says all the right things, but, honestly, I’m still on guard with him.”

She nods. “That makes sense.”

“He asked me out on a date for when he gets back into town.”

She gives me a huge smile. “That’s great. Where are you going?”

“I don’t know anything. He said I can be casual.” I blow out a breath. “I’m so confused about him. He’s completelydifferent than he was during our entire pseudo-relationship. He’s very…outwardly into me. He was never like that. It was purely booty calls.”

“You would just have sex and leave?”

“No, not quite. Remember, we were always friends. We’d have sex, and then we’d talk and laugh for hours until we fell asleep. And then usually have sex again in the morning before heading out on our respective ways.”

She raises an eyebrow. “You were basically in a relationship.”

I shake my head. “No, we weren’t. We never once went out for a meal. We never told another soul. Everything was behind closed doors. And now he throws around the L-word like it’s no big deal. We called things off in Houston because I told him I loved him in the heat of passion one morning. Actually, it was the morning you called to tell us you were engaged to Marc.”

She thinks for a moment. “I called him, and then I called you. You were together?”

I smile. “Each of us heard both conversations. You should have seen Quincy’s face when you started telling me about how Marc proposed while you were fucking. It was priceless.”

She lets out a laugh. “That’s hysterical.” Her face softens. “What exactly happened between you two?”

“After years of our booty calls, I was caught up in a passionate moment and blurted out that I was in love with him. He completely lost his shit, so I kicked him out, for good. I was so far gone for him at that point, but when he rejected me, it was the end of my rope. I couldn’t continue to pretend we were nothing but physical. It was time for me to protect my heart and try to move on. I didn’t see him for months after that day, not until your wedding stuff.”

“Oh, Rip. I’m so sorry. I wish I had known. I wish I could have beenthere for you.”

“I know. The whole situation was messed up. At times, he acted like he cared about me, and then we would equally have times when I wasn’t sure he gave me a second thought. And now he casually tells me he loves me every single day. He’s given me whiplash for years. I’m afraid this is one turn of the head, and the other turn will come when he freaks out like he did that day.”

She gives me a compassionate look. “I can’t give you answers or guarantees. I can only tell you that my brother has grown up a lot in the past few months. I don’t know what he did when he was missing for all that time, but whatever it was gave him some inner peace and direction as to what he wants in life. Has he mentioned where he went to you?”

“No. He pushes his way into my bed every night, but most of our conversations are about Kaya. We haven’t gotten deep yet. I’m not sure I can. I’ve always had this need to help him, but I’m done with that. I need to help myself.”

“Do you want to be with him, Rip? I know what he’s put you through, and he’s an asshole for it, but in the end, do you want him?”

I blow out a long breath. “That’s a loaded question. I won’t lie to you and tell you that it wasn’t always my dream. It was. But I can’t let him hurt me again. Ever. He has to earn my trust. He needs to open up to me. One misstep, and I’m out the door.”

“My fingers are crossed that he behaves. It’s so weird that only a few months ago I had no idea about you two, and now I want it to work more than anything.”

I sigh. “We’ll see. Enough about my drama. How are things with yourhusband? I can’t believe you’re married.”

She leans back on the sofa with a dreamy look on her face. “Honestly? I feel like I’m living in a fantasy.”

“You are. He dresses as Captain America and fucks yousenseless.” Arizona has a thing for Captain America. Layton indulges her and dresses up like him sometimes in the bedroom.