Page 10 of Faking the Book Boyfriend

“Under a photo of your covered ass, which is sexy by the way, I wrote,No plumber’s crack here, but I do promise to crack you up. The only pipes I’ll make burst are yours.”

I smile. “Perfect. Submit it. Game on,Tami Maida.”

Chapter

Two

GEMMA

It’s Sunday night,and I’m flying home from our book signing. We were supposed to stay until tomorrow but there’s a big storm coming in, so I grabbed a late-night flight to get out of Colorado ahead of it.

We woke up hungover as all hell with completely flooded inboxes and social media posts that went viral. Our drunken business creation completely exploded while we slept. Apparently, thousands of men want to learn how to be like romance book boyfriends.

I’ve downed about twenty glasses of water and have eaten the greasiest food you can imagine. I’m ready to get to work going through all the applications. I open my laptop, completely dumbfounded by the number of applicants.

The four of us agreed that we would each take at least one client immediately to see how it goes. Libby and Ava mentioned taking on more than one, but with my demanding job and my writing, I don’t have time for more than one man.

We want to give this business a go, having nothing to lose except a little time. We also decided that it makes the most senseto take on clients near where we live so we can meet with them in person as we learn how to navigate our way through this new business.

I love the idea, but I’m not optimistic that this business will be sustainable. If I’m only doing this once, I want a good guy who genuinely wants and needs my help.

I’m able to filter all the applications for those living in or near Philadelphia. There are several dozen of them.

I start carefully reading through all the answers to our questions, hoping to find the right man.

Wow, some of these guys are super weird. Several of them basically admit that it’s to get into women’s pants. Morons.

There are many others who are interested inusbecause of our videos, not in learning to be book boyfriends.Pass.

Then there are a lot of guys who clearly have no chance of ever getting into women’s pants. I’ll pass on those too.

I’m losing hope until I come across an answer that immediately catches my eye:

Dear Quarterback Princess:

I’m sure your inbox isfloodedright now with men wanting your help. It’s a good thing that I’m a plumber and managing floods is my specialty.

Sometimes it’sdrainingfor me to find the right woman. I think it’scrapthat they’re focused on my job and not on me.

Admittedly, sometimes Icrackunder pressure. That’s why I need aservice callfrom you. Mypipedream is to find someone who loves me, complete with all myleaks. I’m hoping you canunclogthe dating pool for me with your wisdom.

I have faith that the world isflushwith amazing women, but I’m asking for your help to make them see the real me.

Sincerely,

Willing to Take thePlunge

I can’t help but giggle. This guy is clever. Let me look at his picture.

Hmm. It’s only his profile, and he’s oddly in a hat and glasses, but he’s not bad looking. It’s weird that he covered up though. I wonder what he’s trying to hide.

But then I look at his second shot and start laughing hysterically, earning myself a disapproving look from the woman sitting next to me on the plane.

Okay, the plumber is funny, and, if nothing else, he has a great ass.

I think his personal statement alone sets him apart from the other men. This is the guy I want to help.

I pull up the email address he left and let him know that I’m taking him on as a client. I suggest meeting at a local bar that’s usually quiet during the after-work hours, asking that he pick the day.

---