Page 53 of Yearn

But all those fantasies were just that. Fantasies. I lived in the real world, and if I didn’t stop the madness, I’d splinter the group and the friendships I really did care about.

Especially after hanging with Unison, I realized how my friends got me. Coop, Noah, Daisy, Elle, Landon, and Max understood my rhythms, my silences, my creativity. Sure, we fought, and I thought Max was an entitled asshole, but he cared in his own way. After AC, he called and admitted he’d been a bit of a dick lately—that he was happy about Unison but had been worried I’d replace them for my new band and he’d been feeling left out.

The admission both surprised and touched me. He wasn’t the emotional type, but he kind of poured his heart out, telling me I was important to him and that he didn’t want to lose my friendship.

Days before I’d had my tongue in his girlfriend’s mouth.

It was then I swore it was over.

This time, I meant it.

I re-focused on Gabby, who was asking a question. “You happy with the way the songs are turning out?”

I nodded, plucking a fry from my pile. “Yeah. There’s two I compromised on but I think that’s where I messed up in the past. I always want things my way, but working with a band isn’t about that.”

She gave a cheeky grin. “Are you growing up, Adam?”

I laughed. “About time, huh? One of my favorites is the one with Elle. JJ asked if she’d sing it with us when we tour some of the local places.”

“That’s so damn cool.”

“Enough about me. What’s next with The Drip site?”

“I signed up a few cold clients to test things out so I’m excited.” We chatted about the plans for her business and once again, I was impressed with Gabby’s savvy. If only I had thatelusive connection with her, I think she’d be a great fit. But even with that kiss at the club, I felt nothing other than surface physical arousal. Not that intense burn that fired up my body, mind, and soul. Landon had been the only one in my life to elicit such a reaction.

We finished lunch and ordered cappuccinos. The waiter dropped them off and suddenly, Gabby’s face changed to a hesitant expression. My muscles tensed as I waited for her to speak.

“Landon’s moving in with Max this upcoming weekend.”

I pushed through the sick feeling in my stomach and reminded myself it was a good thing. Maybe if I let the possibility of us go, she’d be happy with Max. Maybe it was my ego that told me she belonged with me. “That’s great. Coop and Elle are talking about it, too. Guess that leaves me and you as the singles.”

“Adam, do you trust me?”

I blinked. “Sure.”

“Then will you just be real for once? I know you’re in love with Landon, and I think she’s in love with you. And I’m not here to judge, or lecture, or be anything else than a friend you can talk to. Because I see you being torn apart by this and it’s time you deal with the situation.”

Shock funneled through me. I never thought she’d push the issue. I stared at her, trying to decipher if it was gossip or if she really was into Max, but I only spotted honest care. Something softened inside me, and I ached to tell her. God knows, I was used to building walls and keeping shit to myself on a regular basis. The truth about Landon had been blistering for a long time. Was it wrong to want to feel a bit of relief by sharing my secret? I hadn’t known Gabby for long, but my gut told me she was trustworthy.

I gave one final test. “Why? Because you want Max for yourself or revenge on Landon for being such a bitch?”

Gabby rolled her eyes and gave a dramatic sigh. “No, you idiot. I have no interest in Max and I told you I like Landon now. This is about you. Everyone else froze me out but from the first, you welcomed me into this group. You were real and nice and I’ve never had a male friend who didn’t want to fuck me, which is really cool.” She reached across the table and squeezed my hand. “It would be nice to return the favor and be here for you. To talk.”

The comfort of her hand on mine was a funny thing. I was used to touch, of course, but usually it was impersonal, or strictly for sex. Rarely friendship. Sure, I was tight with Elle and Daisy but their main go-tos were Coop and Noah. Gabby and I had begun as equals. I liked having someone for myself.

So, I said fuck it and took the leap.

“Landon and I have a thing. A crazy-ass connection that I’ve never experienced before, and I’m pretty sure she hasn’t. From the first, she was after Max so I stepped back, but we can’t seem to stay away from each other. Which is so fucked up.”

“Lead me up to what happened in AC,” she said calmly.

I did. I told her about our interactions without the TMI sex details, and all the way up to the kiss. I dumped it all out and Gabby listened without being judgy or with fake concern. She nodded and encouraged.

Finally, I finished and collapsed back in the hard chair. I felt lighter, as if a weight had been lifted. “Do you think I’m a dick?” I asked half-jokingly.

“Nope. Neither is Landon. You can’t help who you fall for,” Gabby said with a shrug. “The real issue is if she’s decided to go full in with Max, the door isn’t just closed. It’s locked.”

I tapped the edge of the empty coffee mug. “I know. That’s why I pulled back these past two weeks with everyone. Sure, it’s work, but I wanted to give us a bit of distance.”

---