Page 133 of Breathe Again

“I don’t know.” He made it sound crazy. “I don’t think I’m loveable, or wantable. I feel like that is the truth, so when you say stuff that’s sweet, I reinterpret it to make it fit into my version of reality.”

“You know your version is fucked, right?” He crinkled his eyes at me, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Maybe,” I conceded.

He dipped his chin once. “I’ll take a maybe for now.”

Zale

They got through their first night, and Mara had a chance to face everyone who was directly involved, the anticipation of that first meeting no longer hanging over her head. She stared off into space and wandered from room to room, retreating into her cell phone games at times. The times when she was present, she was wary of him, of them, but her humor broke through here and there, and with Olivia she was completely natural.

It was nearing lunchtime. Normally Mara would be preparing something, but she seemed lost in her thoughts and unaware of the time. He used to think that was part of her charm, how she wandered around in her head. Now, it seemed her head was a dark place for her to be much of the time. He was playing cards with Olivia in the sunroom when Mara came in and sat beside Olivia, cell phone in hand, playing a game.

“What do you girls want to do for lunch?”

Mara looked up with surprise, then guilt shadowed her face before she quickly moved to her feet.

“I’ll get something ready.”

“I thought we could order in. It’s the first day of Dad’s time off, Olivia, what do you think?”

This was a typical game he played with Olivia, conspiring to get takeout.

“Gyro?”

Mara and I both repeated her answer in surprise, “Gyro?”

“Yes, I would like to get gyro,” she answered in her formal way.

Mara looked at Zale in surprised delight. “She spent some time at Bex’s place!”

Rhys and Rebecca loved Greek food; they must have gotten take-out when Olivia stayed with them.

“I wonder how many things she tried?”

Mara laughed and turned to Olivia. “You expanded your palate, hmm? What else did you try?”

“Lemon potatoes. Pita bread. Gyro. Souvakiki.”

Zale smiled wide. “Souvlaki?”

“Yes, souvlaki.”

“Did you like all of those things?”

“Those ones, yes. I also tried cal-marie, it was rubbery. I did not like it. Rhys was happy, more for him.”

They both laughed that time. “I’ll call Bex and see where they order from.”

She sat back again to make her call, then when the call seemed to go on a bit, she left the sunroom to talk to Rebecca in privacy.

“We’re going to stop after this game, go to the bathroom, so we can go for a drive and pick up the food all together.”

“I don’t want to go. I’ll stay here with Mommy.”

“No can do, Livvy. I want Mommy with me. Tell you what… we’ll all go together, and we’ll pick up ice cream for afterwards. Do you want to bring your bag of happiness? Is there anything you need to add to it for the drive?”

“Yes, there is.”

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