Page 50 of Passion Restored

She shook her head, cursing herself for doing so when her brain went fuzzy again. “I’m late,” she said again, putting emphasis on the last word.

His eyes widened, but she didn’t see the fear she should have there. “Oh.” He swallowed hard. “Okay, then.” He let out a breath. “And you’re feeling sick. Well. I guess the next thing on the list would be for you to take a test to see if that all leads up to one answer or if it’s all just coincidence. I can go to the store for you if you want. You’ll just need to tell me what kind works best. I’d say we could go to a doctor since those tests are more reliable, right? They use blood? But since you work at a hospital, things might get tricky with the whole privacy thing, and I know how you like to be private about everything in your life. So just help me make a list, and I’ll get you all the tests you need. Then we’ll do this together.” He cupped her face. “We’ll do this together,” he repeated. “Because I might not be able to throw up for you or pee on a stick, but I can do other things.”

Why was he being so sweet? And hell, it was just like Owen to ramble on about lists and organizing things when it came to a freaking pregnancy test.

“Owen,” she said after a moment. “I…I can’t think.”

“It’s okay. I don’t think I’m thinking either. Of course, the fact that I just said think really makes that confusing.”

She pressed her lips together, holding back a laugh even though there was nothing to laugh about right then. Not when the one thing she told herself she’d never do might be happening at the worst possible time. He was totally freaking out trying to list his way into calming down. There was no calming down from this.

“There are a couple of tests in the linen closet next to the sink,” she said after a moment, her voice oddly toneless. If she didn’t feel, didn’t put too much into anything, she wouldn’t break. Because she was so close to breaking right then, she wasn’t sure what she was going to do. She couldn’t become her mother, couldn’t turn Owen into her father, but once they had a child… Her body shook. Once they had a child, things would change, and she’d become the person she hated the most. She was already not the nicest person in the world because she always pushed people away to protect herself and them, but once that last piece snapped into place, she’d break.

“You have tests in the closet?” Owen asked, confusion on his face once again.

Liz sighed. “Yes. Tessa and I are two single, sexually active women in the medical field. We also have condoms and other options when it comes to protecting our bodies during intercourse with a partner. Yes, we keep pregnancy tests around just in case because sometimes stress makes our periods late and that can be a trying time. This will just be that time.” She let out a breath. “But we need to be sure.”

“We will be,” he said after a moment and stood up to rummage through her linen closet. His hands didn’t shake, and he seemed so sure of himself. Yet she knew he was freaking out inside. Probably not as much as she was, but enough that he was running on autopilot.

She pressed her fingers over her eyes, willing herself to snap out of it and not go numb. She needed to take this test, find out it was negative, and eat some crackers to settle her stomach. They’d been safe each and every time they’d had sex. There hadn’t been a single accident, tear in the condom, or time where he’d accidentally entered her before pulling out. Even when he’d sent her into a sex-induced coma, they’d been safe.

And yet she knew condoms weren’t a hundred percent effective.

Her body shook. Tessa and others were lucky that they could also have other birth control to protect themselves, but Liz could only use condoms. It wasn’t inevitable that she’d have this…occurrence, but the math didn’t lie.

“You have two kinds here,” Owen said as he sank back onto the floor next to her holding two boxes. “One has the lines on it, the other a clear readout. Which one do you want first?”

“First?” She clearly wasn’t running on all cylinders at the moment.

“I assumed you’d want to take it twice to be sure.” He was being so careful with her, as if afraid she’d snap at any moment. And she knew he wasn’t wrong in that assessment.

She let out a breath. “The clear readout first, then. I could use easy wording.”

“Gotcha.” He opened the box and handed over a foil-covered stick. “The instructions are right on the box. I read them already just in case, but it should only take three minutes after you pee on the applicator for the words to show up. I won’t stand in here and watch you take it, but I’ll get you a glass of water or something if you need it.” He sighed and cupped her face. She didn’t lean into his touch like she had been doing recently, and they both noticed but didn’t say anything. “I’ll be right outside that door. You call me when you need me inside.” He shook his head. “Or rather, when it’s time to read the test.”

Because she wouldn’t admit that she needed him.

Damn it, he knew her so well, and it killed her that she was hurting him, and yet, if that test ended up positive, she knew she’d hurt him even more. That’s how things like this worked. It might not be logical to others, but it made sense to her in some twisted way.

“I could use water for the second test,” she said after a moment.

“Okay, then.” He kissed her softly, and she pulled back.

“I just threw up.”

“I can handle a little vomit,” he said with a wink, though the humor didn’t reach his eyes.

“But this is probably just a stomach bug that you caught.” They both knew it might not be a stomach bug.

“Then I get sick, and you get to play doctor with me again. Be right back.” He stood up and left her alone in the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

Knowing she could only stare at the foil-covered stick for so long without making herself go crazy, she stood up and unwrapped the thing, reading the instructions on the pamphlet inside the box, as well.

Two minutes later, she had the test on the counter, and Owen had come back in to watch the words appear with her.

Three minutes after that, her world shattered.

“We’re pregnant,” Owen said in shocked awe. “Holy…okay, then.”

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