Page 70 of The Preacher's Bride

She rose from the pillows and headed toward her bedroom… alone.

After she closed the door, she leaned her head against it, wondering if he would ever come to love her.

Mia woke early the next morning, wondering if Caleb would ever love her the way he had loved Jessica, and if they could ever become a real family.

Even though what they had was tolerable, she wanted more. She wanted and needed someone to love her as his wife, and to want to create a family with her.

She decided to catch Caleb before he left. She needed to get away for a bit. For a moment, she thought of going back to New York to give him time to make up his mind, but the thought of leaving the children tore at her heart. But staying there was tearing her apart.

So, she decided to visit Ella and the children. Maybe it would help to take her mind off her own problems, and she could help Ella and Colton in any way that was needed.

She looked outside. It was still dark. Just a few streaks of red and purple threatened to break the sky to let the sun light through. Maybe Caleb was still here. She hurried to dress and threw her coat over her arm as she rushed out, hoping she wasn’t too late.

Caleb was sitting at the kitchen table, sipping his coffee. “Good morning,” he said, smiling. But his smile slowly faded when he saw her face.

She pretended not to notice. “I hope you didn’t have plans,” she said as she slipped into her coat. “But I need to see Ella today.”

Caleb nodded as he rose from his chair. “How long will you be gone?”

“I’ll be home later, but you’ll need to fix dinner.” She placed her hand on the door handle. “And I’m taking one of the horses, if you don’t mind.”

“I’ll saddle one for you,” he said as he downed the last of his coffee. “Are you all right?”

She shrugged. “I hardly know.”

He took a step toward her. “Is there anything I can do? Anything I can say?”

She shook her head as she took a step back. “No, I just need a day.”

He nodded, taking a step closer. “For what?”

She bit her lower lip as her eyes welled up with tears. “Not to sound selfish, but I just need a day. I can’t explain it right now.”

“Okay.” Caleb reached down beside her for his boots, slipped them on along with his coat, and then headed out the back door, letting it slam closed behind him. A few minutes later, the sound of horses’ hooves shuffling in the snow resonated outside, growing louder.

Mia walked outside and stepped down off the porch. “I’ll be back, all right?”

He nodded as he handed her the reins.

Mia said nothing more as she swung up into the saddle. “Look after the children for me, please.”

He nodded as a line formed between his eyes.

“Yah!” she yelled, leaning in the saddle as the horse launched into a canter. She looked behind her one last time. Caleb was standing out in front of the house, watching her go.

On the way to Ella’s house, she had some time to think. Could he ever love her the way he should? The way she needed to be loved? The way she already loved him?

Tears ran down her cheeks. After the night before, after he had kissed her, it had triggered her heart and all the love that had lain dormant inside. But she couldn’t live in a one-sided marriage. She needed more… and so did he. She couldn’t give her whole heart while he withheld his.

A few minutes later, she rode up on to Ella and Colton’s farm and came to a stop in front of their house. She slid off and took the reins, ready to lead the mare to the back, but Colton walked out onto the front porch.

“Welcome, Mia!” A broad smile spread across his face as he skipped down the stairs. “It’s good to see you!” He pulled her in for a one-armed hug and took the reins from her with the other hand. When he pulled back and saw tears in her eyes, his face fell. “What’s wrong?”

Mia shook her head, quickly drying her tears. “I’m okay.”

Colton grabbed her shoulders, forcing her to look at him. “Are you sure?”

She nodded and quickly put a smile on her face. “Please, don’t tell Ella. I came over to help. Not to burden her.”

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