Page 11 of Bonding with the Beta

I swallow around my dry mouth. “I know. Sorry.”

“Don’t be. It’s fine.”

“Did you enjoy your baby shower?”

Ava instinctively rubs her stomach and smiles. “So much. This baby is going to be so loved.”

“Without a doubt. How do you feel about everything?”

Her mouth opens, and she shuts it immediately, a thousand different emotions rushing past her eyes.

I scoot closer and frown. “You can tell me, you know? Nothing has to be sugar-coated.”

“People ask me that all the time, and I lie straight through my teeth.” Her eyes lower, and she slumps back. “Jaxon is the only one who knows because he can see everything.”

My hand reaches across the blanket, and I take her hand. “What’s wrong?”

Ava sniffles and looks up at me with teary eyes. “You know this pregnancy wasn’t planned,” she explains, and I nod. “At first, it was so hard for me to come to terms with. I’m almost twenty-two, yet I feel like I know nothing about this world. How on earth am I meant to raise a child when I still feel like one myself?”

“Oh, Ava.” I clutch her hand tighter. “You’ll be a great mother.”

“Everyone keeps saying that.” She tugs her fingers away. “How do you know I’ll be a good mum? I have zero maternal instincts. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. I feel like a fraud, and I don’t want to let Jaxon or our baby down.”

My chest aches at the panic and pain rising in her voice. “I’m sorry you’re feeling that way,” I whisper. “But you know you could never let that man down? I don’t think you even see the way he looks at you. He thinks the absolute world of you. I also think you’re forgetting that being parents means you’re a team. It’s not a competition. I know everything will work out, but I think it’s normal to be having these thoughts, Av.”

She hums softly. “I know. I’m just so scared. I don’t want to do anything wrong.”

“It’s a learning curve,” I state. “For you and Jaxon. You’re going to get things wrong, but you will learn from them and do better the next time. Do you think all parents do everything perfectly? No, because not every child is the same.”

“Yeah,” she croaks. “I guess. I can’t stop overthinking.”

“Have you spoken to Jaxon about it like this?”

Ava drags a hand through her dark hair. “A little. I don’t want to worry him.”

“You need to talk to him, Av. Be honest. He might be able to help take away some of this pressure you’re putting on yourself. You need to communicate.”

“I know,” she whispers. “Thank you, Kay. I really appreciate it.”

I give her a moment to compose herself before she starts laughing. “Honestly, these hormones are crazy. I know I used to cry at anything, but now I feel silly.”

“Oh, no,” I shake my head. “What have you cried at?”

Ava purses her lips.

“Tell me!”

“The weather forecast.”

“What?”

She presses a hand to her head. “I know. It’s stupid.”

“Why the weather forecast?”

“There was this old guy on there, and it looked like his first day or something. He kept messing up and started sweating, and I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I started crying,” she explains with rosy cheeks.

A laugh barks out of me. “Wow.”

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