Page 132 of Bonding with the Beta

“Please,” I sniffle. “Go.”

Because my heart is breaking and this is how easily I can turn.

“Do you even care about this relationship?”

I squeeze my eyes shut at his words. I care—of course I care—but he doesn’t deserve this. Tears stream down my face, and I clutch my hand to my chest, tangling my fingers into the material of my jumper.

“Kayleigh.” His voice snaps me back into the room, and I open my eyes to find his devastated face. “I need to know if you’re even going to fight for this.”

My head shakes once. “I-I can’t.”

Kayden nods and purses his lips. “Great.” He flashes me a dejected smile that shatters me to pieces. “Thanks for giving up on us so easily.”

He leaves moments later, and I drop to the floor, cradling my arms over my knees. A tear rolls down my cheek as I bury my face into my legs. “Fuck,” I curse. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

I cry and cry, and I realise the only person I have to blame is myself.

That night,I decide to go back home.

I didn’t really want to spend the next few weeks with my mother, but it’s better than being on campus by myself or in the company of Josh. I’m not risking it again.

It’s been four days since I came home. Four days since I last spoke to Kayden.

He told me he loves me, and I told him to leave.

“Honey.” My mother pokes her head into my bedroom. “Do you want some dinner?”

“No,” I mumble into my pillow.

She sighs and steps inside. “Kayleigh, you’ve hardly eaten or left your room since you got home. What’s the matter?”

I close my eyes. I can’t cry anymore. I’ve run myself dry.

“Nothing. I’m fine,” I say, wiping my nose with my sleeve.

“Did you fight with Evie?”

“No.”

“Did you get a bad grade?”

“No.”

“Did you speak to Josh?”

“Mum.” I push myself up from the bed and stare directly at her. “Please, will you just leave me alone? I need to be alone. I can’t?—”

She rushes towards the bed and perches beside me. “Kayleigh, what on earth is going on?”

“Please,” I choke. “Leave me alone.”

Her blue eyes hesitate for a moment, and the concern adds another slash to my heart because of everyone I’m pushing away. “I’ll be downstairs if you want to talk,” she replies calmly. “Whatever you want to talk about, I’m here for you. Remember that.”

She closes my bedroom door behind her, and I close my eyes in defeat. I collapse onto my bed and stare numbly at the ceiling. My chest aches. What is wrong with me?

Kayden doesn’t deserve this side of me.

Neither does my mum or Evie.

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