Page 6 of Agony of Our Regret

Luca watched me. “Different how?”

“If he hadn’t been so upset, he wouldn’t have cheated. You wouldn’t have gotten mad at him. The fights in Mexico never would have happened––”

“And we’d all be here together?” he guessed.

“Yeah.”

“Noah would have left no matter what. He dropped out because he couldn’t handle his visions.”

“He would have reached out to us. He would have told us because there wouldn’t have been tension. We’d all be speaking,” I countered.“Nothing would be like it is now.”

He lifted his sandwich and took a bite, thinking and chewing.“And you assume it would have all been for the better.”

Wouldn’t it have been?

“You’re not thinking about what could have happened if there were…” he cut himself off and glanced around. “An accident with Vince.”

“No one knows that would have happened.”

He cocked a brow. “Through four years of playing football.”

“Something he was already doing at Arlington,” I shot back.

“Not on the same level,” Luca sighed. “We left only a few months after his birthday. He grew so much while we were at the academy.”

“Yeah, his control did too.”

“The point is, there’s no way of knowing. There’s just as much of a chance something would have happened as there is of nothing.” He paused. “Probably.”

He cocked his head.

“Actually, I don’t know if that’s right. There’s probably some equation to calculate the risk.”

“I’m sure Gavin did the math if there is.” I cracked a smile.

“Yeah, he probably did.” Luca rubbed between his brows. “It sucks. It was a horrible situation with no easy answer, but we know Gavin. He’d never do anything to hurt us, not without thinking about it from all sides. He would have weighed the pros and cons and gone through all the possible outcomes. I’m not saying I trust him more than Vince, but in the end, all he did was alert the Society. The Council decided to step in.”

Finally, I nodded. “You’re right. About all of it. He did what he thought was best, even knowing it would piss off Vince.”

I stared at my half-eaten lunch, no longer hungry. “I need to apologize to him.”

“That would probably make you both feel better.”

“So, there’s no chance Vince will ever come back?”

Luca didn’t answer, but I knew. Not with what Gavin confessed.

“That also explains why he hasn’t texted me since the accident.”

He checked in to make sure I was fine, and that was it.

He finally looked up and replied. “Everything’s out in the open now, at least. No more secrets.”

“No more secrets,” I repeated. Was that true? I couldn’t believe there wasn’t something else waiting to jump out and rip the rug out from under me.

Again.

Maybe I should just expect that now. Every time things felt settled, just wait for the bomb to go off. That would make each shock a little less upsetting.

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