Page 45 of Lucas

31

Lucas

After talkingthings out with Abby last night, I decided to meet up with my dad and Arisha today. They weren’t happy that I’m doing it with the both of them at the same time, but I don’t care. If we’re going to do this, I want it on my own terms. I’m the one who’s been kept in the dark for over twenty-three years and I want answers. There are always two sides to every story, and having them in the same room will keep them accountable. No more damn lies!

In my crazy twisted way, I love my dad. Hell yeah I’m angry, but if not for him I wouldn’t be doing what I love. So I’ll listen to each of their sides of the story and then decide what happens next. Depending on what kind of role my dad played in all of this will determine whether I want to continue our relationship or cut him out of my life. As far as Arisha, I’ve only agreed to this meeting because Caleb was furious over what happened the other night. For the band’s sake, I’m trying to keep the peace.

We’re meeting up at theBistroonce again and I’m reluctant since I’ve been having a hard time keeping my temper in check. Dad assured me we’d sit outside where I could bust out anytime I needed to. I guess he’s trying, so it’s only fair I do the same. I really wanted Abby to come with, but she declined. It’s for the best, but I have her on speed dial just in case I need her.

Twenty minutes later, I’m pulling into the parking lot and I notice my dad’s Porsche is already here. Well, let’s get the show on the road. “Reservation for Knight.”

“Perfect. Follow me,” says the hostess. I do, with trembling legs and a knot in the pit of my stomach. When I see both of them sitting there, I just want to make a full U-turn and walk right back out. Just like when I step on stage until the crowd cheers, but there’s no one here to cheer me on today.

“Lucas, thanks so much for coming.” Dad stands and holds out his hand. Yeah, not a huggy-feely kind of guy. Arisha wears a cautious smile, as she should. I hope she’s not expecting an apology because that will never happen. I take his hand in mine and give it a firm shake. “Have a seat, son. What would you like to drink?” He waves at the server and she rushes over.

“I’ll have a beer. Whatever’s on tap, thanks.” I need all the liquid courage I can get. It’s going to be a long-ass lunch.

Clearly, no one wants to start the conversation, so, being the ballsy guy I am, I do. “I recall you mentioning that my birth mom was a bar singer, why’d ya lie?”

“He didn’t lie, Lucas,” Arisha says, eyeing my dad. “I was very young when I started out. In fact, I was too young to be in those sleazy clubs, but I had a fake ID like everyone else in the city. When we met, I had stars in my eyes and he was a recording guru who could further my career.” I can’t help noticing the insulted look on my father’s face. Hmm, truth is hard to swallow, even after all these years.

“So, you slept with the boss man and I just so happened to be the catastrophic mistake to further your career.” Wow, if I hated her before, I hate her even more now.

“You were never a mistake, Lucas. I think you should address these questions to your father instead of berating me.” Ah, I knew it was a matter of time before the waterworks started.

“Arisha’s right, Lucas. If you need someone to blame, that would be me. I was so angry that she didn’t reciprocate my feelings that when I found out she was pregnant, I made her sign an NDA giving up all of her parental rights. She was desperate to keep you, but had no financial means to hire a lawyer to fight me. It’s a mistake I live with every day. So, if you’re going to be angry, then aim it at me.”

Well, I guess I had this all wrong from the get-go. I should have known that he would manipulate someone who was weaker than him.

“Let me ask, what did you hope to accomplish by having this little chat today? That all three of us would kiss and make up?” I’m fuming, but since I’m only doing this once, I want to hang tight and get it over with.

“I can’t speak for your father,” Arisha says, “but I want to get to know you. The man, not the musician. I realize that’s asking a lot, but now that everything’s out in the open, there’s no reason to continue with the facade. I have no intention of telling the world I’m your birth mother if that’s what you’re afraid of, but I’d love to be your friend.”

A friend. How fucked up is that. Only weeks ago she was a stranger, a singer on the radio. A damn good one, but someone so untouchable I never thought after the audition I’d ever see her again. I should have known something was up when she started hanging out at the studio.

My head swings over to my dad, who is giving me the evil eye. “And what do you hope to accomplish today? Forgiveness? You’re a smart man so I hope you know that will never happen.”

“I don’t expect your forgiveness, son, but I was hoping you’d understand why I did what I did. If your mother—sorry, Mrs. Knight—thought Arisha was a threat, she would have made our lives miserable. Best-case scenario was for me to raise you and have Arisha step away. I knew she’d have an amazing career and be a star. I didn’t think of the long-term repercussions or I never would have done what I did. I apologize to the both of you for being such an asshole and keeping you apart all these years. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll let the two of you catch up. Lunch is on me.”

I’m not sure if he thought I’d stop him, but I don’t. Maybe he’s doing me a solid by walking away and letting me get to know my new friend.

***

Abby

While Lucas is havinglunch with Arisha and his dad, I take the time to get my apartment and life in order. Now that we’ll be on the road for months at a time, Lucas thought it would be best if I didn’t renew my lease. I’m elated he asked me to move in with him, but afraid, too. I’m hoping that being together every waking moment won’t put a wedge between us. I know I’ll never get sick of him, and I hope he feels the same.

Thank god it’s a furnished apartment, so I don’t have to worry about any of the bulky pieces. The only piece of furniture I brought with me is my sleigh bed and mattress. Whatever I’m keeping needs to go into a storage unit, and my personal stuff will be brought to the loft. I still have to pack up my dishes and all of my small kitchen appliances. Lucas promised he’d help me sort things out when he was finished with lunch.

I’m easily distracted, so when I come across a box of pictures I found on the top shelf of my closet, I can’t help but rummage through it. Sitting on the edge of my bed, I flip through the old photographs. It’s bittersweet when I come across the ones of Adam and me when we were younger. Who knew way back then he’d be a snake in the grass and pull the rug out from underneath me? I love working with Lucas and my confidence has grown a thousandfold, but I really loved being a barista. There’s something truly gratifying about creating art in a cup of coffee. It lights up the customers’ faces and puts a smile on many a grumpy lip first thing in the morning. I’d like to think my artwork might have been the little something they needed to brighten up their craptastic morning. I suppose I could sit here all day and procrastinate, but that won’t be productive.

Another thing I need to do amidst everything else is pack for the tour. I have no idea what I should bring, and when I asked Lucas, his answer was “everything”. Ugh, so not helpful. I get that no matter where we go, the weather will be different, and if he only knew how many clothes I have, he’d pitch a fit. Not that I wear them much. Come to think of it, maybe I should make a trip and drop things off to charity. They have tons of bins scattered about and someone else might get more use out of them than me. Something to think about.

My stomach rumbles, so I decide to take a break. All I had was a yogurt with my coffee this morning, so I’m running on empty. I’m disappointed when I look in the fridge and nothing tempts me. A glance in the freezer is even more disappointing. The cupboard has potential, so I open a can of soup, grab a bowl, and stick it in the microwave. Beggars can’t be choosers. And the smell is enticing even if it will taste like shit.

The soup wasn’t too bad, and it filled the space in my stomach for now, so there’s that. With a renewed strength, I tackle the kitchen. I have a few boxes with inserts so it will be easy to get that over with before Lucas shows up.

I soon find a rhythm, and hours later the kitchen is packed and ready to go. Now I either wait for the man who was supposed to be here hours ago or I do it myself. I’m not angry, I know he has tons of baggage to work through, so I grab a box and head downstairs. Only to discover that I let him borrow my car! How the hell did I forget about this little tidbit of information? Well, I guess I have no choice but to wait.

---