Page 44 of Passions & Peonies

Love, Lacey

I flip through the pictures and stop on one. She finally sent me the picture of her from the plane.

“Is it from her?”

“Mmhmm.” I sit down on the bench and hand Josh my phone for him to read it. On the counter near where my phone was is a heart-shaped shell. I pick it up and trace it with my finger.

So many emotions are zipping through my body that I don’t know what to think. I’m mad at myself that I didn’t wake up or hear her before she left. I’m mad at her because she left without saying a word. But we said all we needed to say last night.

“I’m sorry, bro. What are you going to do?”

I rub my hands up and down my face. “What can I do? She’s gone and not coming back. We knew it was only for a week but… I never thought it would hurt this bad. If it hurts like this for me after one week, I can’t imagine what Sawyer feels like after losing Deb.”

“Didn’t you talk about seeing each other when you return to the Hamptons?”

I tell Josh what we said last night. “I understand what she means. What kind of relationship could we have? I don’t want her for only six months.” I growl and stand up. “But how can I even think that after only being with her for a week? Have I lost my fucking mind? How can such a beautiful woman get under my skin so quickly that I can’t bear a day without seeing her beaming face or hearing her laugh?”

“I’m sorry it worked out this way. Maybe—”

“No maybes. She’s gone, and I have to accept that. She’s the one I want, but she’s right. She doesn’t deserve fifty percent. She deserves all of me. We both do. But again, how did we get to this point in such a short amount of time?”

“I’m not going to answer that for you. You already know why.” He claps me on the shoulder. “I’ll leave you alone. Let me know if you need something.”

“Thanks. I’m going to clean up the boat. When I’m done here, I’ll go to the office. I know it’s a busy day. Thanks for covering for me so much this week.”

“You bet. It was great to see you relax and have fun. It’s been a while. I hope it was worth it.”

“She’s worth everything to me. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

“Then take some time and think about what is right for you. If you care for her as much as you think you do, then do something about it. Maybe respond to that text or call her.”

I nod.

If it were only that easy.

Chapter 22

Lacey

I didn’t tell my family about Will, and Sky has kept her promise and stayed quiet too. She’s been coming to the city almost every weekend and has been getting to know the rest of the family better. Just like I told her, Jocelyn has welcomed her in like she’s always been here.

Sky and I agreed on the same story to tell them about our vacation. We said it was awesome and we’d go back in a heartbeat. I managed to plaster my usual smile on my face before we got back, but it hurts to fake it all the time. It’s exhausting to act like the peppy, positive one when I’m not anymore. And I miss feeling that way. Sky knows I’m still hurting, so she lets me talk her ear off most of the time.

I got a new phone, and I almost passed out when I saw that I’d somehow managed to send the text message I created for Will. I must have hit the send button right before I dropped the phone. But that hurt even more, because he didn’t respond. Not even an emoji. But what did I expect? He’s doing exactly what we agreed to do.

Meanwhile, I’ve become a bit of an online stalker—I stare at his name on WhatsApp and wonder what he’s doing when it says he’s online. I also looked up the marinas’ websites, but there aren’t many pictures of him on them. I researched how to get a boating license—and I don’t have a boat!

I’ve walked past Chloe’s flower shop several times. I’ve even stopped a few times. But as soon as I get hold of the door handle, ready to go in and introduce myself to her, I chicken out and leave. The peonies are there, and they’re gorgeous, but I haven’t bought any. My desire to buy flowers has disappeared.

To torture myself even more, I had a few red streaks put in my hair. My family and friends commented on it because it’s not my usual color and it’s more dramatic. They act like I dyed my hair completely red.

But today is going to be the test. Sophia and Drew have finally set their wedding date for the last weekend of October. They were able to reserve a banquet hall at the Leonardo Grand, Will’s uncle’s hotel. She set up an appointment with Chloe to discuss wedding flowers. She asked me and Jocelyn to go with her. I don’t know how much more torture I can endure.

Chloe might recognize me as a customer, but she won’t know who I am. Knowing that she’s Will’s sister kills me for some reason. I wonder if he told her about me and how much I love her flowers. Or does only Josh know about me? If I didn’t tell my family, why should Will?

Wake up and smell the peonies, Lacey!

I want to smack myself senseless. It was vacation, and it’s over. It was only a vacation romance. So why, after all these weeks, do I still miss him so much?

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