Page 52 of Vibing Unity

“I’m lost,” Lucca muttered. “Isn’t it better to talk about this stuff? I mean… We have before—why is it a problem when I do it?”

“This isn’t a you thing,” Hudson assured him. “No, something else is going on here.”

I was glad he understood that and could reassure Lucca because I didn’t want him to feel that way. It took me several minutes to calm down and feel composed again, hating that I spun out so easily sometimes.

Then again, talking about kids and their futures maybeshouldbe the time to spin out, and people didn’t take that seriously enough too often.

Reality in general.

“We weren’t raised like you guys were even if Tamsin ended up being royalty,” Darby said for me when I was calm. “People just have kids because they love each other and want children, not for heirs and to take over worlds.”

“That’s not what—” Hudson defended.

“I know,” Darby interjected. “I know that’s not what either of you are saying or even what we’ve all said before. We’ve had this discussion before. Somewhat. You’re just talking reality and logistics. I get it.”

“But it’s also that Julian and I are the only ones who have said—he’s said that he wants to have children with me,” I whispered, hugging my knees to my chest. “A girl with my hairand… I get it. I’m not open to the topic because I think I’ll be a shit mom, but this all just seems too cold. The pressure. On us.”

“On the kids,” Lucca sighed, getting where my head went. He blew out a harsh breath when I nodded. “I’d never force or push my kid to be Alpha, Tams. I just don’t like the idea of taking the option away when it’s something I want.”

“I get it, Lucca. I do. I think you’re being good to this kid who’s not even here, but as the one you’re talking about having the kid with one day, it’s all a bit too cold,” I whispered.

“I’m sorry, cream puff,” he mumbled, his voice sounding lost and hollow.

“It’s also we’re signing her up for a lot of kids,” Neldor added, him and Julian having joined us at some point. He didn’t say anything until I looked at him. “I’m with you that I want to be excited and have kids for love. I’m just not there after what my mom did. I don’t think I’ll ever be half the dad mine was. What if we have one and it’s a boy or a girl who doesn’t want to—”

“To be queen,” I whispered, scared of that as well. “Do we have to have another like buying another car instead of making a life? Does Faerie deserve that, and—can we be that cold about popping out babies to love?” I glanced at Lucca. “What if we never have a bear child? Will you want us to keep having children until we get one?”

Tears filled his eyes as he understood the question I really wanted the answer to. “Will I hate you if you don’t give me a shifter child to lead after me? No, cream puff. Never. The gods will give us the child or children we should. If we’re not meant to have a bear—then that’s what’s meant to happen and my niece or nephew will take over. Family.”

“What if you don’t feel that way later?” I whispered, hating that I felt like I was opening another can of worms instead of us settling something.

Or really, Lucca did.

“Tams, you’re spiraling a bit on this, and I think you need to take your hormones into consideration this time,” Julian said gently, not backing down when I shot him a nasty look. “You’ve said it again and again that you worry people hate you or are mad at you when you’re on your period or about to start it. That sounds like this conversation.”

I opened my mouth to blast him but then sighed. He wasn’t wrong. “It’s still valid.”

“Yes, but we won’t know any of those answers, my sweet mate. Everything and anything can change. You might not ever be able to conceive with him. Or one of us. One of us could have a problem. My family could go bankrupt before we have to worry about an heir. Darby could try to take over the world and we’ll have to deal with that instead of having babies.”

“I would worry more about my little sister,” Darby drawled. “She is a fucking demon now that she’s talking. And she throws everything.”

I knew they were saying that to add levity to the situation… And it worked. It really did.

It also really did take five of them to keep me in line sometimes. Seriously.

14

Advanced Healing wasn’t going to be a lot of classroom work or even textbook anything given the nature of it and the fact it was a new class. But mostly, it was magic that couldn’t just be replicated like talismans or growing magic. It had to be used on someone live.

So it wasn’t really at the designated time but more emergency services?

I fully understood and agreed, but it was a nightmare to coordinate and sort of became the magical version ofHouse. I figured that out with the first case.

Except with a lot more people.

Like… Alotmore people.

Many, many more people.

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