Page 85 of Fall at Once

“It’s okay. I get it, promise. I’d be the same way if I had kids of my own. But really, it’s barely even dinner time. It’s hardly late.”

“Oh, honey.”

“Stop it. You’ve got to quit, ‘oh honey-ing’me; you’re going to make me cry. I’ve cried enough today.”

“Baby girl,” she whispered, holding her arms out. “Come here.”

I went. I burst into fresh tears and let her hug me. It felt good to get it all out.

“I’m such an idiot.” I sobbed into her shoulder. “I think I ruined everything.”

“You did not. That’s impossible. Tell me all about it, and we’ll make a plan to fix it.”

I pulled back to study her face. “Haven’t you heard most of the gory details from Riley and Abigail? Or Gigi?”

“No. They keep your secrets, honey. And before you ask, Gigi didn’t tell me anything other than you were upset and I should come over here to check on you.”

“Oh. That’s nice to know.” I followed her to the couch, and we sat down.

“However, I do know about your fondness for Cole. She didn’t tell me on purpose. It’s the way she talks about him, and I know you were planning the fundraiser together, and, well, I can put two and two together; let’s just put it that way, okay? Am I right?”

“Yeah, you’re right, and apparently, he wasn’t ready for all this.” I waved a hand up and down in front of myself. “And how do you know so much? You couldn’t have figured it all out on your own. Please.”

“I’m your mother. I know everything, don’t you know that by now?” she tsked. “And even if I didn’t, I have eyes and the power of observation. Ever since you were a little girl, you’ve always thought Cole was cute. Plus, the gossip from Cozy Creek has spread all the way to my office, thanks to my temporary event planner. Your itty-bitty crush is more now, yes?”

“Itty-bitty crush?” My voice rose in surprise. “I used to think he was cute? I don’t remember any of that.”

“Oh, yes.” She brushed my hair over my shoulder and smiled. “You used to cry when Riley and Abigail played tag with the Sutter boys in the street. But you were too little to join, so he’d always bring you a peony from his mother’s garden whenever they were done. Those lovely pink ones in the backyard, all fluffy and soft. I wonder if they’re still there.”

I sat there blinking and wracking my brain, trying to remember. “How could I have forgotten that? I mean, maybe I remembered bits and pieces. I’ve always loved peonies. Maybe that’swhy?”

“I bet it is.” She eyed me knowingly. “You were a toddler, and he probably doesn’t even remember doing it. He was very young, too, and being kind was second nature to him; he was such a sweet little boy. But I thought it was the cutest thing. Gigi and I used to swear the two of you would grow up and get married someday—after you graduated from college, followed your dreams, and grew up to be a fully evolved woman, of course.”

I laughed. “Obviously.”

“But then, your dad and I divorced, and we moved to Colorado Springs. Then that little Sherry girl from next door caught his eye, and that was that.”

“Well. Holy shit.” I loved the idea of having a history with Cole, even a minor thing such as this.

“I know, right? It’s kind of like fate has stepped in, isn’t it?”

“Well, I’m afraid I blew it.”

“Well.” She stuck her tongue out at me teasingly. “According to Gigi, he hung the moon. So most likely, he’ll be removing his head from his ass at some point, and then he’ll come crawling back, begging to be with you.”

“Doubtful. And it’s too late for that.” I blew a disgruntled breath. “I’m hurt and also embarrassed. And a tiny bit mad at him, too. I don’t care if I have a right to feel this way. I just do. I put myself out there. I wish I could take it back.”

“Gotcha. I’d probably be feeling the same thing. Love is a bunch of bullshit, isn’t it?”

“It is. Total freaking bullshit.”

“He’s not that hot anyway. You could do better.”

“He’s totally hot, Mother. Are you blind? He’s a firefighter. He literally saves lives for a living. He’s a hero and a good dad too, by the way.”

“Meh, whatever. Dads are overrated. Moms are where it’s at. Take me, for example. I am here for you and ready to listen. I give the best hugs. Not to mention, I have the DoorDash app pulled up, and I’m ready to order all the takeout you want. I bet you’re hungry. Aren’t you?” She held up her phone.

“Oh, I’m starved. You’ll just have to trust me; he’s a good dad, and his kids are awesome. I want pizza. Get extra pepperoni and a huge Diet Coke.”

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