Page 19 of Hear Me Roar

I cringed, knowing full well what that meant; drunk, brutal sex with a one-way happy ending. I could already picture the bruises I’d have when I awoke. Every hair on my body rose at attention, fear-induced goose bumps breaking out along every plane of skin. I fucking hatedthis.

“Okay,” I whispered, defeated, curling into a ball. “I’m going to hang up, Dimitri; my head ispounding.”

“Feel better, my love. I will you see youlater.”

A lone tear rolled down mycheek.

Click.

Why the helldid I think this was a goodidea?

Thatwas the very question I’d been asking myself since Knox began wrapping my hands. Had you asked me three hours ago, maybe even two, I would’ve given you a million reasons why. But now, as I sat here, anxious out of my mind, I couldn’t give you one. Regardless of all the training we’d done to prepare, I felt less than, and suddenly, all I wanted was the safety and comfort of what I was familiar with, and the certainty that came with ittoo.

“You ready, baby?” Knox asked, pulling the pink tape snugly around my fingers one lasttime.

My answer was instantaneous. “No.”

He froze and although my eyes were glued to the floor beneath my feet, I knew he was observing me keenly. The warmth of his penetrating stare heated every layer of my skin from the sheer force of its intensity. Setting the roll of tape down beside him on the bench, he sigheddeeply.

“Talk to me. What’s goingon?”

“I just...I...I don’t know,” I stammered, shaking my head as another wave of unease floodedme.

“Hazel, look at me,” hedemanded.

So I did. I lifted my gaze and immediately noted the hint of worry that flashed over hisexpression.

“What’swrong?”

“I don’t think I can do this,” I said, my voice all buttrembling.

“This again?Why?”

“I don’t know. It’s just so different. There’s so many rules I have to abide by now, and Terra has much more experience than I do. Not to mention I’m the newbie. Aside from you, I won't have anyone out there rooting for me, and you know how much I love my fans. I thrive off theirenergy.”

Knox’s head reared back in disbelief. “You really believe you're not going to have a lick of support around thatcage?”

“Yeah.”

“Then you’re in for a rude awakening, baby. Let’s put aside the fact that everyone we love is here, but when I went out there to show them to their seats, I caught groups of people who are here,justfor you.If you don’t think your fans from The Underground have followed you since leaving, you’re wrong. And what does it matter that Terra has more experience? She was never Queen of The Underground for four consecutive years, and she sure as hell hasn't gotten a title since going pro. Listen to me.” He grabbed my hands. “I get being nervous, it’s to be expected with every new experience, but Iknowyou can do this. You were made for this, kitten, but you have to believe in yourself. Where's the cocky, fearless Lioness I love somuch?”

“Cowering like a wimp,obviously.”

“Well, tell her to quit it and lift that head up high. You’re a Queen, and I refuse to let you go out there feeling defeated, when the fight hasn’t even started yet. If you step foot in that octagon with negative thoughts, the outcome will be negativetoo.”

I turned my head away from him almost shamefully. I knew he was right, and I knew I could do this. But fear was a powerful emotion and change was fuckingscary.

“Let me ask you something. Who rose to the top her first year as afighter?”

The question pulled me away from my fears and sparked a familiar flame within me. “Me.”

“And who owned the title year afteryear?”

“Me.”

“And who was the fighter everyone dreaded going up against,” he pressed, spreading the fire through myveins.

“Me.”