Page 97 of Manny

She’s the whole package; smart, funny, beautiful, caring. I know she has layers to her that I’ve yet to discover, and it shocks even myself that I want to learn what those are. All those quirks, even the ones she thinks are bad, are where all the good stuff is.

Then there’s Manny. I don’t know how to explain it, but the connection is there. I realize now that the reason I’ve never ventured into any kind of relationship with a man, whether it be a one-night thing or more, is because I’ve never had a connection like I do with Manny.

It’s weird how I’ve been alive this long, but I’m only now starting to learn these things about myself. When I kissed him, it shocked me. It raised all kinds of questions, but I pushed them aside.

Being naked with him? I want that. I want it more than anything because I’m a physical being and I like it when the people I care about know it. When I can do things for them, so they know.

I may be a brute at times, but I would take care of both of them in the bedroom. I know Lace loved being pummeled as much as she did being taken care of afterward. She’s a dirty little girl and I love that side of her; the one where she tells us what she wants and we learn every curve of her body, how she wants things, how she likes things.

Having sex with Manny fills me with as much trepidation as it does excitement. I’ve never kissed a man in my life, but when we touched, my entire being set on fire. I could’ve done so much more, and it’s clear he wanted to; judging by the fire when he kissed me back.

His body is beautiful. Muscled without being obtuse. Lean. Perfect. His dick is mouth watering, big and long and when Iremember seeing it ramming in and out of our girl while rubbing against mine, it makes me wanna turn this sled around and drag them both back there. Into our little bubble. With me, Manny and Lace together? Man, that’s my every fantasy brought to life.

My son shifts and I’m brought back into the reality; my child. What would he think of all of this and how do we negate any of it if things…if things what?Work out? Are we really gonna enter a throuple relationship? Or am I jumping the gun just a little?

“You okay, bud?”

“I’m good, Dad.”

I smile to myself. I’ve been blessed with my child, and I like to think Jill is watching over him. He’s never given me a lick of trouble, not like I did when I was his age. Then again, I never had a stable upbringing, so I can be forgiven for some of that. He’s also only a child, so maybe things will change when he’s a teenager. I just hope we’re always like this and no matter what the future holds, he won’t hold it against me for my life choices. I’m done with running away from my feelings and judgment.

My sister would be shocked, but then again, it’s none of her business what I get up to. I’m not bringing Eli into any of it. As far as the club or anyone knows, nothing is going on, and I want to keep it that way.

Having the boys judge me does send a trickle of fear down my spine. I’ve always had to save face my entire life, hiding from my true self. But something tells me that if they accept Manny knowing full well he’s bi, then there is no reason they couldn’t accept me. Which reminds me; Cash talked about Manny being possibly patched in, but no more has been said about it. Then again, Bronco was told to get a cut organized, so maybe they’ll do it soon?

It warms me when I think about the look on Manny’s face if he were to get that cut. He’s earned it, and I’m not just thinking that because of that thing I said about him just being a cook.I know that was wrong, and I’ll never utter a cruel word like that ever again. I was nursing a bruised ego, and fighting my confused feelings, but that’s still no excuse.

We travel through the city and out to US 90, heading toward Fort Pike. Cash said we could stop today so Eli could see some of the fort and ruins. Out here we’re miles away from the city; just wildlife reserves, swamps and bayous. Sometimes we stretch even further toward the beach and coastline of the Gulf of Mexico, but today we take it easy and walk around Fort Pike. I’m all for my son learning a little history. Then we grab some lunch and take the trip back at our leisure. I avoided talking to Lace or Manny. Keeping my eyes off them has been proven difficult all day, but I smiled to myself when I saw Lace taking photos and posing for selfies.

Today has been magical; having everyone here from the club to let their hair down after months of being in lockdown, and Eli excited about visiting the fort. There’s nothing that compares to the freedom on the road and being around my brothers.

Harlem and my sister ride next to us, and my family is complete. I can’t shake the feeling that now I’m onto such a good thing, it could be all undone. The shiver that runs up my spine when I think about all of the things that I can’t control. The decisions that I’ve had to make when Eli was being cut out of my wife’s stomach so he could have a chance at life. Maybe that will never leave me, I doubt it ever could, but it’s made me stronger. I can’t use my past as an excuse to hide who I really am, and when I’m with Lace and Manny, all of that goes away.

When we pull back into the clubhouse lot hours later, the weight of the world is no longer on my shoulders. For the first time in a long time, I feel relaxed. Cash has arranged a barbecue for dinner, and Manny, of course, is in charge of bossing everyone around. I put my arm around my son, sitting outside as it’s warm and enjoying the balmy evening. Deanna walks upand passes me Caprice. “You don’t mind for a second, do you, Bandit?”

I grin. “Of course not. You know how much I love kids.”

Caprice is almost two now, and she’s grown so much over the year that I’ve been here. She also has a flock of black hair like her momma, and Cash’s blue eyes. She’s tired, almost asleep, as Deanna scruffs Eli on the head and I hold her in my arms. I’m always the one the women come to when Harlem isn’t available.

When I see Cash, Hawk and Bronco in my periphery, I know something’s going down. I press the beer bottle to my lips and try to hold in my grin when I see what they’re holding. Manny has his back to the group, still cooking sausages, steak and corn.

Cash dings his fork against the neck of his beer to draw everyone’s attention. So they’re finally gonna do it. “It’s a little of out of left field, but I have an announcement,” he starts, Deanna folding into his side as she beams. Everyone quietens down as our gazes swing his way. “As we know, someone in the NOLA Rebels has been pivotal in keeping our club not only fed and well nourished, but also given us a place that feels like home.”

“Is that because he won’t get the hint?” Ryder calls out and everyone laughs.

Manny has stopped in his tracks, turning with the tongs in one hand, and a hotdog bun in the other.

“Like we’d want him to, we’d all starve!” Bronco laughs.

“Which is why it’s high time we recognized that being a member of this club isn’t just about patching in members and honoring those on the committee, it’s about family. It’s about loyalty to this club and the endurance that it takes to be part of an MC,” Cash goes on. Ryder steps in, taking the cut from Bronco and handing it to Cash; it’s a big deal. Like handling the crown jewels. The cut is brand new; the patches are still vibrant and new. It has Manny’s name at the top left breast pocket, then Club Chef underneath it. “So it’s with honor and pride that theentire club was unanimous in patching in Emmanuel today and welcoming him as a permanent member of our club for as long as he’ll put up with us. Manny?”

I watch him from across the room, my eyes flicking to Lace, who has tears running down her face as Halo wraps an arm around her shoulders. Trust her to get all emotional over it, though I have to admit, I have a frog in my throat at the sight of his shock.

“For me?” he squeaks.

Cash laughs. “Don’t see any other fucker around here with a pussy boy name. Get over here before I change my mind.”

He drops the tongs, and when he doesn’t move, Summer takes the bun out of his hand and gives him a gentle push toward Cash. Manny may enjoy being the center of attention most of the time, but I’m chuckling to myself at how uncomfortable he really is when the spotlight is on him. “Wait? Does this mean you guys now get to beat me up? I remember Pipes looking like a half-dead raccoon when you’d finished with him. You all realize this is my money maker?” He circles his face and chuckles ring around the group.