Page 89 of The Photograph

“Hey, Des,” Alex says when I answer.

“Hey! How’s it going?” I curl a strand of hair on the top of my head around my index finger.

“I’m going to stay here tonight.”

Frowning at the wall of my apartment, I examine the picture of Mitzi that my lovely friend Alice drew for me.Sleep at his parents’ house?

“You’restaying? Do you want me to come and get you or …”

“No. It’s fine. I need longer here. I want to talk to my parents some more.”

Well, that’s positive, right? “So, it’s gone well?”

There’s a long pause. “I think I owe my sisters and Mom some consideration here.”

What does that mean? “In what way?”

“Mom’s been in floods of tears all day. It’s been tough on her dealing with Dad’s explosions. I want to at least try for them.”

My stomach drops. “Try what?”

Another extended silence.

“Do my best to help. Understand what’s going on. Try and mitigate the effect on them and the rest of the family. Give them some protection.”

An unsettling hollowness creeps through my gut.

“I don’t think I’d thought about how much it affects everyone if I carry on with this,” Alex adds.

Ifhe carries on?There’s some doubt?“Such as?”

“All my family relationships. I won’t be able to attend Hannukah, family bar mitzvahs, my sisters’ weddings, births. It’s a lot.”

Where is all this coming from? “Who told you that?”

“The rabbi.”

“You’ve been to the synagogue?”

Alex blows out a long breath. “No, the rabbi was here, at the house. It’s been an intense day. Everyone was here when I arrived: all my aunts and uncles. It was weird, like they were welcoming me back into the fold. I wasn’t expecting it to be honest. So I panicked.”

Hepanicked?“What did you agree to?”

“Nothing. Well … just to stay here for a while.”

He’s moving backhome? I’ve put my trust in someone who can’t stand up for something he believes in, something I thought he wanted. I shake my head.

“What conversation are we having now, Alex? Are you saying that it’s over?”

“Of course not!”

“But you’re aware that their problem is that you’re gay and in a relationship with another man.”

“Perhaps there’s another way to get them to come around.”

“You remember that your dad hit you, right? Have they said anything at all about you being gay? Have you?”

There’s silence when I say this.

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