Page 50 of Beautiful Dangerous

Always the hard way. Everything she fucking does is always the hard way. And I keep my eyes on hers as she slowly unzips the jacket, flinging it open, her jaw clenched in frustration. And there it is. The vest she thinks will protect her, when she knows as well as I do that it won’t protect her from anything.

“Take it off.”

“It can’t hurt to wear it. Extra insurance.”

I take a few steps toward her, our eyes still locked, it’s a battle of wits now. Her stubbornness versus my fear of anything happening to her. That’s why I’m doing this, it’s not like I’m on some kind of ego-trip here. I’m trying to save both our fucking lives.

“Take it off.”

“Fuck you!” she hisses, her eyes clouded by a darkness I’m all too familiar with. I’ve seen it before, the black mist that takes over, transforming her into that beautiful monster.

I move closer still, but her expression doesn’t waver, she remains defiant. “When they come for you, they’re going to hit you, right here.” I jab the first two fingers of my right hand into the center of her forehead, but still her gaze remains fixed on mine. “You’ll go down in a heartbeat.”

She reaches up and grabs my wrist, yanks it away from her head, she wants a fight. She wants to push me, in a way I think she’s punishing me. For rejecting her?

“No stab vest in the world is going to save you, baby girl.”

She keeps hold of my wrist, her eyes still boring into me, and images of her and me, and Javier, they’re filling my head, confusing the fuck out of me at a time when I need to be focused, one hundred per cent. Today of all days, this shit isn’t welcome.

She finally lets go of me, flinging my arm away like it’s a piece of trash, and she steps back. But she’s still holding my gaze, still staring me down. “I’m doing this, Lucca. I’m fucking doing this, and if you can’t understand why I need to end this…”

“They will kill you, Olivia. Do you understand that? If they see you, they will kill you.”

“You’re as much at risk as I am. As Eddie or Angel or any of the bikers, we’re all at risk.”

“Wedon’t matter. We’re collateral damage, you’re not. This cartel needs you…”

Javier needs you.

Javier wants you.

I fucking want you, you beautiful, twisted bitch…

She shakes her head and backs up against the wall, and for a moment the blackness lifts from her eyes, and she’s back to being the woman I don’t want to love, but I do. And I can’t. I can’t love her, I don’t have that right.

“I can’t lose you too, Lucca.” Her voice is little more than a whisper, and her guard is right down now, she’s let the mask slip, and all I’m seeing is a sad and vulnerable woman who shouldn’t be living this fucking life. “I can’t lose you, too.”

“I’m not going anywhere, Olivia, I promise you that. Which is why I need you to stay here, so we can do the job as quickly and cleanly as possible. You really don’t need to be there. Don’t give them the satisfaction of knowing you care how they die. Don’t do that.”

She drops her head, but only for a second, and when she raises it the black mist has returned, and her guard is back up, Jesus, she’s fucking killing me here!

“I have to be there.”

“Don’t do this, Liv. Please.”

She takes off her jacket, rips off the vest, and reaches for her gun, tucking it down the back of her jeans. “I have to be there. And you know, deep down, that you can’t stop me.”

I can have a damn good try. “Even if it means putting me in danger, too?”

“Jesus, Lucca, we’re already in danger! We live our fucking lives in danger every fucking day, this is just raising the level slightly.”

I’ve had enough now, she’s pissing me off and wasting my time, we don’t need this shit today. And I’m too quick for her as I slide my hand around her waist and pull her gun from the waistband of her jeans, tossing it onto the bed.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

“Saving you.”

She laughs, a hollow, cynical laugh that echoes off the cream-colored walls, filling the room as we face each other in another heightened stand-off that she won’t win. Not this time.

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