Page 1 of Sheltering Instinct

Prologue

“Tess, I love you,” Abraham’s voice, usually a rich baritone, came through the phone as dry and raspy. “I would be honored if you would accept my hand in marriage.”

Tess stared straight ahead; her eyes held wide.

In the silence that fell between them, Abraham stammered, “I know what I’m asking of you,” Abraham cleared his throat, then whispered, “And I think you understand that my asking you to accept my hand in marriage is a complex commitment.”

Her day had been so banal. She was reading from her pile of scientific journals, munching from a bowl of cold popcorn. She wasn’t ready for this call or for life to change in the blink of an eye.

It had happened to her before. She’d been living through a normal day when she’d been, quite literally, slung into a new reality. All one could do was hold on tight and go along for the ride.

Tess glanced around and saw the worried look on her roommate Shanti’s face.

She felt bloodless as her whole body trembled.

As a child, Tess had learned that the only way to express big emotions and stay safe was to shiver.

She wasn’t a child anymore.

Adults face the world squarely on. Tess tried to roll her shoulders back, to stand erect like a soldier, to borrow some bravery from the rigidity of the stance. “Do you need me to come to you?” were the words that showed up.

Marry Abraham.

She was going to say yes, of course she was. She just hadn’t worked the words up to her lips yet.

“I think Ghana, for me, would not be optimal in this situation. I would prefer to come to you.”

“Yes, of course.”

“Does that mean?” For the first time through this conversation, there was energy in Abraham’s words. His vowels fluttered with hope.

“Yes, I’ll marry you. And as soon as we can. The sooner, the better.”

“Thank you, Tess. There are probably some things that need arranging on your end.” In Tess’s imagination, she saw Abraham’s words glow a warm, golden, relief-filled color. “And there are things for me to do here. I will most likely come at the beginning of June.”

“A June wedding will be beautiful.” She felt her throat close around those words and hold them back, if even for a moment more. “I’m going to hang up now. I need to figure out what hoops we need to jump through.”

“Thank you, Tess. The children and I love you. We will be a good family.”

Abraham needed her. With stage three cancer and two young, motherless children, he needed her.

And Tessneededto do this.

“Yes. Yes. It will be good. I love you, too. I'll see you soon.”

Shanti was on her feet, running in place, her hands tightly clasped and held to her chest. The jubilation that she reined in until Tess swiped the phone closed bubbled out with a whoop and joyous laughter.

Tess struggled to lift her head to catch Shanti’s gaze.

“You’re in shock!” She ran over and grabbed Tess’s arms, which hung heavily at her sides like she was a beanbag doll.“Snap out of it!” Shanti jumped up and down, grinning ear to ear. “You just got engaged to Levi! We need to celebrate.”

Shanti probably interpreted Tess’s silent tears, slithering, fat and salty, down her cheeks as happiness.

But these tears were shed for the ramifications of that phone call. And all the people who would feel the effects.

For Abraham's plight, she shed tears of heartache.

For what she was giving up, there were tears of grief.

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