Page 91 of Broken Bonds

That could have been me. I could have ended my life after my alphas were gone. I considered it, wanted to so many times. But I knew deep in my heart that it’s not what they would have wanted for me. I also couldn’t do that to my babies.

After reading this, I feel grateful to still be here. I may be hurting and grieving, but I’m still standing. In spite of the pain, I’m still here, and with time, I hope that moving on will seem less daunting.

ChapterTwenty-Nine

RAMSEY

“Hey,how do you feel about another girl’s night tonight? The babies will be here in just a few short weeks, and I could use some more girl time before they get here.”

Jilly and I are outside on the dock, enjoying the sunshine while it’s out with thermoses of hot chocolate clutched in our hands and throw blankets wrapped around our shoulders. Despite the chill in the air, it’s a pretty day, and I know spring is right around the corner. I’ll be glad when all the snow melts away completely and gives way to fresh grass and pretty flowers.

“Hell yes! I want all the gossip and to watch all theMagic Mikemovies. Those are my terms,” she says, throwing a grin my way.

I roll my eyes playfully at her and nudge her shoulder with mine.

“Deal. Do you mind if I invite someone else? She might not be interested, but I think she could use some girl time, too.”

“Who?” she asks quizzically, brow furrowing.

“Shelby. Remember? The alpha that was over before we went on our trip?”

“Oh, yeah. She ran away awfully fast when I showed up. If I were more self-conscious, I’d have been offended,” she jokes.

“She’s nice. And I think she’s been a little lonely since her omega died. She has friends, I’m sure, but I don’t know. I get the impression that when she’s not at group meetings or helping someone with their grief, that she goes home alone and closes herself off,” I say sadly with a shrug.

I could be completely wrong. But either way, I enjoy Shelby’s company, and I’d like to invite her over to have a fun night. And maybe pour my heart out to her some more and hope she gives me some clarity.

“Well, invite her. I’m sure she won’t turn you down, and we’ll have a fun night watching men take their clothes off on the projector screen.”

* * *

Later that evening, Jillian and I set the living room up for our night. We’ve made an awesome mini nest to sit in with all the blankets and pillows we could find in the house, an array of finger foods and snacks, and plenty of drinks. The projector screen has the first movie queued up and paused, and everything is set so, now we’re just waiting on Shelby.

My phone keeps pinging with text messages from Forde, and every time one comes through, I can’t stop the smile that takes over. Jilly has been eyeing me every time my phone pings, but I dutifully ignore her piercing gaze.

“Someone’s awfully popular tonight,” Jillian singsongs the next time my phone pings and I snort.

I quickly read his message, sending one back, and then put my phone on ‘do not disturb’ and stash it away as I fluff the pillows.

A knock on the door draws my attention and I move to get up, but Jilly beats me to it.

“I got it.”

She pads barefoot to the door and lets Shelby in while I lean back against the couch and snack on some M&M’s.

“Oh. Hello. Is Ramsey here? I’m not early, am I?” I hear Shelby ask and chuckle.

I raise my hand high so she can see it over the couch and wave.

“I’m over here. It’s hard to get up and down off this floor these days,” I say loud enough she can hear me, and wait for them to come to me.

Shelby and Jilly make their way over to where I am and Jilly plops down by my side and steals some of my M&M’s, making me smack her hand and scowl at her. When I look back at Shelby, I notice she’s wearing her pajamas like I told her to, and they’re so adorable, with little pandas munching on bamboo all over them. Her hair is thrown up on top of her head and she looks so unsure that I almost feel bad for her. She also can’t stop sneaking peeks at my best friend as she continues to try stealing my candy.

“She has no manners,” I tell Shelby, rolling my eyes and patting the empty space next to me. “Come on. Jilly wants to watch the Magic Mike movies, so we’re starting with the first one. I’m glad you came,” I say, whispering the last bit at her and giving her a smile.

She smiles back at me and says, “Thanks for inviting me.”

Jilly presses play while Shelby gets comfortable, stuffing a handful of popcorn in her mouth and gluing her eyes to the screen in preparation. Shelby and I chuckle under our breath when we see her just keep grabbing handfuls and shoveling them in her mouth, both of us leaning back and looking up at the screen.

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