Page 11 of Broken Bonds

“Let’s get this over with, shall we?”

I try to put on a brave face; I really do, but I’m pretty sure I fail.

Jillian doesn’t call me out on it though, instead nodding and helping me get my shoes on before we walk out the front door. The sun’s rays beat down on us causing my sensitive eyes to sting. Jillian passes me a pair of sunglasses and I could kiss her.

She puts on her own as we get in the car the guys bought for me when they found out we were expecting multiple babies. The new car smell is still prevalent inside, and my chest begins to ache again.

With one last deep breath and a good talking to internally, we head to Crystalwood Hospital.

My heart —or what’s left of it anyway— is in my throat the entire drive.

ChapterTwo

RAMSEY

Parking my car,I can’t help but feel a sense of dread as the hospital appears ahead; its tall structure a looming reminder of the difficult task I have ahead of me.

In a few months, I’ll be here again to bring the babies into the world, right above where Van, Ollie, Lake, and Rule’s bodies lay right now. Fitting that I’ll bring the lifeblood of them into this world in the same place where Death took them away.

I think I’m going to be sick.

My hands shake and I clench them to stop the trembling. I shut my eyes tight and try to inhale and exhale, pushing the nausea away for what seems like the hundredth time. I’ve been battling it since we passed the massive oak tree. Despite my efforts not to look, I still saw some of the car’s remains.

I do my best to quiet my pounding heart, trying to regain some semblance of composure. When I’m certain I won’t have an emotional breakdown in the hospital parking lot, I take a deep breath and exit the car. I hear Jillian get out as well, and we come together on her side.

She takes my hand in hers and gives it a gentle squeeze as we make our way through the parking lot to the entrance. Moving my feet one after the other, I look straight ahead, doing my best to shut out my surroundings.

The cool air is a relief from the scorching sun when we walk through the sliding glass doors, though the sweat on my skin that had appeared on the short walk has left me feeling clammy and makes my shirt stick to me. Today is a warm, beautiful day.

This is wrong.

Everything iswrong.

Jillian asks about the location of the morgue at reception. The compassionate receptionist looks at me with pity as she explains the route to our destination to Jillian. My face remains totally expressionless, my teeth biting into my cheek when I feel myself gearing up to cry... again.

As we walk down the hallways devoid of any color, the scent of desperation, sickness, and strong industrial grade cleaner singes my nostrils. My emotions are a riot inside my head, assaulting me from every angle.

The entire walk to the morgue, I keep my eyes ahead and work on locking those emotions up in a little box inside my head, stuffing everything in there and sitting on the top to lock it. Then I shove that box into the deepest, darkest recesses of my mind to be dealt with later.

Right now, I need to walk through those doors so I can see my alphas one last time.

When we reach the right area, Jillian knocks on the window to get the person on the other side’s attention. I feel lightheaded as I glimpse a metal bed with a sheet overlaying it.

Can I really do this? Can I walk in there and look at all four of them? Can I say goodbye?

Do I have a choice?

The woman pokes her head out of the entrance, studying us. She smells like rusted iron and her alpha energy washes over me, but luckily it isn’t too intense and doesn’t make me uncomfortable. More than I already am, that is.

“Yes?”

I clear my throat and attempt to speak, but it’s like my lips have been glued shut and my tongue feels thick, sticking to the roof of my mouth. Several tense seconds pass before I unglue my lips, and it still takes licking my dry lips several times before I fight the words out. Jillian lets me take the lead here, not interfering when I stumble. She stands by my side, offering her silent support and offering me what little strength she has for me to get through this. We’d talked about it in the car at length, and as much as she protested and said she could do this for me, I declined vehemently.

I will do this, nobody else.

“I’m Omega Daniels. I’m here to see the bodies of my mates,” I finally rasp out.

My voice comes out a little stronger than it has in the last twenty-four hours. Barely a tremble throughout.

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