Page 81 of Ho Ho Oh No

“Technically, her hands are in you,” she deadpans without missing a beat.

Sawyer moves back to my side, and we reach for each other in unison. Mom approaches from the other side, with Sue hanging out in the corner as planned.

“Where’s Leo and Big Al?” I ask them.

“They stepped into the hall,” my mom answers. “Unless someone shoos them away, they’ll be right outside the door.”

I like having my brother close for this, even if it’s just the artificial sense of safety he provides. I wish Drew were here too.We told him and his family to stay in Maine for the holidays because of the stupid mafia threat.

Turning my attention to my nurse, I ask, “Laci, is it still okay for the three of them to stay in here for the delivery?”

She nods, darting her gaze from Sawyer to Mom and then Sue. “As long as no one gets in the way, that’s fine. We’ve got lots of space in here.”

My doctor comes in without fanfare. She’s as cool as a cucumber while one of the nurses gives her an update. Another nurse holds open some type of protective covering. Doctor Root steps into the shirt, and the nurse ties it behind her.

Next thing I know, her big blue eyes are sparkling in front of me. “Ready to become a mom times two, Samantha?”

“Seems irrelevant whether I’m ready or not.”

She rolls her eyes, having grown accustomed to my brand of snark over the last few months. “I like to give my patients the illusion they have a choice in the matter. But yeah, you’re right. It’s go time, regardless.”

Stuff keeps happening between my legs, and I’m vaguely aware of the nurses talking and working together on who knows what. But my attention is on the doctor.

“Are they okay?” I ask her, all my sarcasm evaporating.

“Yeah. We’re gonna get the first one out quickly to ensure she stays that way.”

Sawyer squeezes my hand, stroking my knuckles with his thumb. “Will you need to do a C-section?”

She kicks her head back, mouth quirked into a smile. “I almost didn’t recognize you without a silly accent.” She winks at me, then gives us a serious answer. “Baby A is right in perfect position. So she is coming out the old-fashioned way.”

Laci announces, “We’re ready, doctor.”

“Here we go,” she responds, moving into position at the foot of the bed.

“Can I do the thing?” Sawyer asks me, his big brown eyes begging me.

I answer with a flick of my wrist. “I’ll allow it.”

Channeling Mariah Carey, he squeals, “It’stiiiiime.”

Chapter 21

Grandfather Christmas

TOMER

Lettie rests her head on my chest, wrapping her frame around my midsection. I cover her with my arm as much as possible to keep her exposed shoulders warm. I’d give her my shirt, but I’m in the ragged John McClane tank top. No help there.

Although it’s in the eighties in Clearwater, it’s chilly inside since the damn air conditioning in the hospital is set to turbo blast. Perhaps they’re trying to artificially make it feel more like the holidays since Mother Nature dropped the ball again this year.

Lettie’s subtle yawn brings a sleepy smile to my face. I’ve offered to take her home at least ten times so she can sleep in a bed instead of on a hard waiting room chair. But she’s stubbornly determined to wait out the babies.

Apparently, Klein and Mia are experiencing similar resistance from Klein’s mom. Each time they try to get her to leave, she becomes irrationally angry. Keeps talking aboutthe bag. So they’re staying along with the rest of us.

We’ve taken turns doing sweeps of the hospital perimeter, looking for signs of trouble. Josh, Marley, and Deb volunteered to camp out at the entrances to ensure hospital security doesn’t let anyone in without a bag check and metal detector scan.

I kiss the top of her head, stroking my thumb up and down her shoulder. “I’m sorry your party ended in disaster. You worked so hard.”

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