Page 63 of The Bonds of Nyx

“Bullshit.” He didn’t look my way as he stopped and waited for me to ward the next tree. “You’ve been standoffish since Ivy and I completed our bond. I get it—you thought that because she expressed the mate bond with you first, you’d get to complete it first. But life doesn’t happen that way.”

I pressed my lips together. Logically, he was right. Although the bond is clearly there for both of us, it never meant we would complete it first. It was unrealistic of me to think that way—especially with the baggage between us, baggage we definitely haven’t worked through even though she’s assured me she has.

And although I wished it was me, I cared too deeply about her to begrudge her for completing the bond with Elias.

“I know,” I replied finally, stopping at the next tree. With each charm, the wards strengthened, the power almost visible to me as I glanced behind us at our progress. “I guess I don’t understand. You were a real dick to her.”

Elias glared at me before shrugging. “I knew she was my mate the night she was attacked by hellhounds. My wolf made it known when we were back in the apartment.”

I almost dropped the wards as I turned to him. “How could you keep that to yourself?”

As soon as he’d known, he should have made it known to Ivy. It might have prevented her power surges and given her some relief from the nightmares.

It was almost too tempting to punch him, but he started off on the path of our patrol again. “I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to scare her, obviously,” he growled. I could almost hear his teeth grinding as he stomped through the forest. “And honestly, although the wolf was ready, I wasn’t.”

“Why?” I asked, without thinking.

He paused, shook his head, and sighed. “You really think the council will be happy about an Alpha with no pack, no name, being the Queen’s mate?”

My response was on the tip of my tongue. I knew the council, the representatives of each species who worked alongside my mother and her personal council—her mates. I wanted to disagree with Elias, and yet, I couldn’t. Because I knew they’d think Ivy should be with a shifter from a better family. One that could summon an army for her should she need it.

Finally, I shook my head. “They’d question the mating.”

Elias nodded. “Even though she took my mating bite easily, they’ll still call to question whether it will hold. Even though she wears my shifter mark on her back, they’ll want to test whether it is actually mine. And even though we have all the markers of mates, they’ll still want me to prove my worth, despite Nyx being the one to create me for Ivy. Because I won’t be worthy in their eyes.” He came to a stop at the final tree and leaned against it. “Butshedoesn’t see it that way. She wants me regardless of any of that. And maybe that’s why our bond appeared when it did.Maybe I just needed to know she didn’t see me as the worthless pup I’d been brought up to be. And she needs me to be her protector now more than ever. You just need to show her you’re more than your past.”

I swallowed thickly. “I don’t know how,” I replied quietly. “I think I really fucked up before. I don’t feel worthy of her.”

After everything we’d been through—what we had put her through—I doubted my ability to be there for her. To protect her in the way she needed.

“No, you didn’t.” He pushed off the tree. “Take the night with her. Just be there for her. Show her you can be relied on. Especially after letting go of her mother. She needs to rely on you.”

Bile rose in my throat, and I nodded silently, tying off the final ward as I did. It surprised me that he was willingly leaving Ivy to me tonight. His wolf would be more protective than before, being so close to the mating. But he was doing me a favour, giving me this time.

Our eyes met as we started our patrol circle again. “Don’t look so starstruck,” he replied with a roll of his eyes. “The wolf knows we have to share. There’s another bastard out there already tied to our girl, and once he’s near, I’m going to get him so close to death he knows never to leave her again.”

I snorted. “Not if I get to him first.”

Elias shook his head, and a dark grin formed on his lips. “He better be careful. Ivy’s hurt over his clear refusal to be with her now, even if she doesn’t realise it. I know it pains her to think about this mate who should be at her side, helping her. But he lied to her before, and he’s lied to her since. She even blocked their bond when she realised.”

“I want to kill him,” I said, shrugging as his brows rose. “This Fae male is currently experiencing the high of a magic boostthanks to her coming into her power, and he’s doing nothing to help her regulate the surges.”

Elias’s eyes darkened, and a familiar rage filled the glowing green of his irises. “We can handle it. Once you complete the bond, we’ll work out a system.”

“It won’t be that easy.” I lowered my voice as we passed the side of the house. “Each mate completes a facet of her magic. She needstimewith each bonded mate. My mother couldn’t go longer than two weeks without one of her mates because her magic would surge without the necessary release and connection.”

The wolf swore under his breath. “Why didn’t you bring that up before? During the discussion of this prick?” he hissed, turning on me.

“Because I didn’t know.” I held up my hands in surrender. “I asked my sister about it after the meeting with my mother. She wanted to ask me about Ivy’s preferences for the Academy. I brought up the obvious question: what about you and me? We can’t be enrolled, and she explained it to me. Apparently, it should have been obvious, but I think she forgets she has over a hundred years on me.”

My stomach twisted at the thought, but I pushed it aside. “We’re going to be recruited as instructors and guards,” I said, picking up my pace. “We need to be close to her at all times, my sister says, especially early in her transition.”

“Does your mother know about the other mate?”

I shook my head. “No, and I don’t think Maeve wants to say anything about it yet. She knows there’s a chance Ivy will be anchored by the time we return. If anyone knew…”

“They could use him against her.” Elias cursed, scrubbing a hand through his hair. “He could be anywhere. Avalon, one of our cities, or the Fae realm, and I’ve heard nothing yet from my contacts.”

A feeling of despair opened a pit in my stomach. My pace slowed until we were walking at a crawling pace. “We need him to help regulate her magic.”

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