Page 20 of A Rogue Cowboy's Kiss

“I wasn’t free. I was trapped by the promise I’d made. Now, I’m free.”

Her heart tightened. Whatever he’d been trying to fix, it had hurt him. She could see it. “I’m glad you’re free, Falcon. What are you going to do with it?”

“I want to move to the Hart Ranch,” he said quietly. “I want to put down roots. I want to grow a garden. I want to find out what life is like when I’m not running all the damned time.” Hepaused. “I want to get married. Adopt some foster kids who need homes. Create a life I’ve never had, not even as a kid. Create a family, and make one for others who never had it either.”

Her heart seemed to stutter to a full stop for a moment. “You do?” Never in all her life would she have guessed that was Falcon’s dream. He’d always been a vagabond. A loner. When she was younger, all she’d wanted was a knight in shining armor to swoop in and take care of her. That need had made her chase a lot of jerks who had shown her that she was better off counting on herself.

“Yeah.” He turned to face her. “The opposite of you, I guess. We’d never work.”

“Us?” She blinked. “Us?”

“Yeah.” His fingers tapped the railing restlessly. “Here’s the deal, Bella. I came back for you. I want that house on the ranch, but I want it withyou.I wasn’t going to tell you. I was just going to sweep you off your feet. But if you would really never get serious or settle down, if the future I want isn’t ever a possibility with you, then I want to know.”

She felt like she couldn’t breathe. “You want…me?”

“Yeah. Always have. But my life was too dangerous. I don’t care if I need to wait another ten years, if there is a chance. But if there will never be a chance, I need to know.”

She stared at him, too stunned to speak. “It’s…you’ve…never…”

“I had to keep you safe.” He shifted. “What do you say, Bella? Is there a chance you would want to get married someday? Move to the ranch? Have a family? With me?”

She couldn’t believe she was having this conversation. “Foryears,I dreamed of you,” she said. “I dreamed you’d come back from one of your trips and take me away from my life. We’d run to New York City. I’d become a fashion designer. We’d go to fancy dinners, and Broadway, and the opera. We’d never set footon a ranch ever. Never pat a horse. I’d wear a long dress all the time, and you’d wear a tuxedo every day. We’d be so far away from our pasts that they would vanish forever.”

His eyes flickered with an emotion she couldn’t read. “You wanted me.”

“I wanted you to save me with your rippled muscles and moody silence.”

He grinned. “I’m not moody. I was silent because if I spoke, I’d do something like ask this sweet young thing to wait for me, even though I might never come back for her.”

She sat back and flung her hands in the air. “If you had said that, I would have sat on my front step every single minute for the rest of my life, waiting for you.”

He grinned. “I’m not worth that, but that image is great for my male ego.”

She rolled her eyes. “You were my imaginary knight in shining armor. I kept thinking you would save me, and when you didn’t, I went in search of other men who would.”

His smile faded.

She leaned forward. “I would have given anything for a chance with you back then, Falcon, but it would have been a terrible mistake. I needed to find myself and realize how to rescue myself first.”

“And now?”

“I’ve spent my whole life doing the exact opposite, until I got on that plane and flew out here to do the wedding I did last night.” She took a breath. “I think that crush on you is still there. I think I would be willing to give up on myself to move back to the ranch to be with you, and that would break me. I can’t do that, Falcon.”

He nodded slowly. “I couldn’t do that to you.”

Her heart was pounding. “I can’t believe the man I’ve had a crush on my whole life wants me.”

“I can’t believe the woman I’ve dreamed of for years thinks I have rippled abs and a coat of armor.”

The air was strung so tightly between them, she felt like she was going to snap. “What now, then?”

He let out his breath. “I’ll leave.”

Oh, God. She didn’t want him to leave. “If you stay, I’ll lose myself in you,” she whispered.

“I know.” He stood up. “I spent twenty years chasing a monster, and I’ve wondered many times if that quest was turning me into one myself. If I take you away from who you need to be, then I’d know that I’d become exactly what I didn’t want to be.” He walked over to her, slid his hand under her jaw, and leaned down. “Bella Hart, I have loved you since you were sixteen, and I’ll love you ‘til I’m gone. For that reason, I’m getting the hell out of here before I become less than the man you deserve.”

Then he bent his head and brushed his mouth over hers.

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