Page 114 of Jax

“I…” Ronnie gasped, her chest stuttering with a struggle for breath, her spare hand tightening around the damp flannel around her collar. “I can’t leave it behind, Jackson.”

“Ronnie….” The word was torn from deep down in my chest. I felt my legs sinking into the mud beneath me, my own breath slow and natural, as if this wasn’t happening at all. As if she hadn’t just said that to me.

“No,” I growled. “You can’t do this to me, Ronnie. Not now.”

“But, Jackson—”

“YOU PROMISED!” The roar bellowed through the rain. It scratched my throat all the way up like liquid acid that exploded into the air. I felt sick to my stomach. A hot burning began to rage inside of me.

“I know, Jackson,” Ronnie cried. “But now we’re here… I can’t give up on it. I can’t give up on the horses. I can fix the farm!” she pleaded, her hand jumping from her shirt to mine, clinging to the limb like she was dangling on the edge of a cliff.

But it was me that was blindsided. It was me that felt like I was hanging on the edge of everything and nothing.

“You can’t fix it! I’ve tried. For years and years, I’ve tried. But my parents can’t be changed!” I screamed, my fist squeezing around hers, as if I was trying to push the thoughts through to her.

Her arm bent, trying to relieve pressure in her arm, but I didn’t care that I was hurting her. I didn’t care if she was in pain. “You need to listen to me, Ronnie. You need to come with me. We can start a new life. We can start up our own farm and let it be everything we want it to be!”

Ronnie shook her head.

“RONNIE!” I cried. My frustration and pain and betrayal crying out alongside me.

Ronnie flinched, as if the sound struck her.

But it didn’t change her mind.

She didn’t hesitate. And with the sob breaking through her lips, her head shook even harder. “I can’t….”

“Ronnie,” I whispered, the bag falling from my defeated shoulders as it slapped against the wet earth. I stepped into her space, my hand coming up to cup her face and turning her to look at me. Her wet skin was warm against the touch of my palm, eyes bleached a paler green against the white light as they flickered up to me.

“If I leave now, I’m not coming back,” I vowed through the broken and defeated ache of my voice. “I will forget about my parents. I’ll forget about this farm. And I’ll forget about you.”

Her sob jerked her face in my hand as she shook her head.

“If you don’t come with me now. That will be it for us. Whatever future you hoped we’d have, whatever love you had for me. Whatever feelings I might have grown to have for you in the future… everything… I’ll leave them behind and I’ll forget about them forever.”

I brushed a fallen strand of hair from her face. “Will you still choose to stay here?”

Her sobs broke into a heavy cry as her head broke loose of my hold, tears falling to the ground as her shoulders slumped in defeat.

“Fine,” I croaked, my vision beginning to wobble. “Goodbye, Ronnie.”

As if I was in concrete, my legs ached in pain as I turned from her, reaching with my hand to pick up the fallen bag and stepping away.

Her hand clung harder to mine as I pulled away. “Jackson!” she cried, tightening her wet grip, as if trying to hold me there. But she couldn’t. If she couldn’t follow me… I couldn’t stay.

“Jackson! Please!” she begged. I didn’t stop.

Not even as I felt her wet fingers slip from mine.

The faint sound of a snapping thread rung in my ears, but it didn’t stop me. Each step didn’t get easier, and as her cries grew louder and louder from me, all I could feel was the empty hole growing in my heart.

I had been betrayed.

I didn’t look back once. Not even as I heard her knees crash into the dirt. Not even as I heard her breath struggle. Not even as I heard her whispering plea for me to come back.

I climbed into the cab, wiped my wet face, and nodded at the driver.

“The girl—”

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