Page 7 of Kissed By Shadows

“O–okay,” I murmur, trying and failing to keep the tremble from my lip.

“He’ll just use it against you, against me,” he says as his forehead crinkles, and I swallow, knowing that he speaks about Sergi and his need for ultimate control over his son. “Come, let’s get you in the tub.”

I miss his warmth as soon as he steps away, but he takes my hand, which is some consolation, leading me into my bathroom. The almost full bath is full of bubbles and I assume some bath salts as the jar is open on the side.

No words pass between us as he turns the tap off, helping me into the hot water. A deep sigh leaves my lips as it covers my body, my muscles relaxing into the warmth as I lie back.

“I’ll be back soon,Dorogoi,” he assures me, placing a light kiss on my head before leaving the room and pulling the door, not shutting it completely.

I listen to him moving around my room as I soak, the swish of the sheets being changed accompanying my slow and steady breathing as I try to process what the fuck happened in the past few hours.

How did I go from a normal young woman with a bright future ahead of her to this? Being owned by the Russian Bratva, losing my virginity to my childhood crush—who happens to be the son of the leader—and having the proof of my virginity being paraded for all to see?

Low voices draw me out of my thoughts, the bedroom door softly closing, and my heart races. They’ll all know what Nikolai took, what I gave him. Although, would I have done so under different circumstances? I don’t regret that my first was him because I’d always fantasised that it would be him.

But those were the dreams of a young, naive girl who knew absolutely fucking nothing of the world and all the shit that is in it. My jaw clenches when I think about my father and what he’s done.

We’ve always been so close, my mother leaving before I was old enough to walk brought us together. It was me and him against the world. My throat tightens when I think about Nik’s words earlier and the fact that my dad didn’t have a choice. Was he hurt? Where has he gone? And why didn’t he take me with him?

Questions swirl around my mind as my hands trace the bubbles in the water. How could he have just traded me like a piece of property he had no other use for? I know he sent that message, and Nikolai says he didn’t have much of a choice, but to sell off your own daughter…that shit’s fucked up. That’s the kind of unforgivable act that will haunt me for the rest of my life.

I think about getting in touch with him, calling or texting him back and asking him all of this, demanding that he explain himself, but aside from the fact that Sergi has my phone andI can’t remember my dad’s number, would that put him in danger? Does he even have his phone or did he ditch it so that Sergi wouldn’t be able to track him? And do I even want to speak to him after what he’s done?

I’m sure Sergi promised that I’d be looked after, but surely my father knows the man better than I do, and I know that he likes to hurt people, I could see it in his eyes downstairs. He liked my fear, and I know from his treatment of Nikolai, and from what I can guess, that Sergi is not a good man.

“Are you ready to get out?” Nikolai asks, his deep voice interrupting my swirling thoughts, and I startle a little even at his soft tone. I glance up to find him leaning in the doorway, his tattooed arms crossed over his muscled chest, wearing just his black boxers.

My brain short-circuits for a moment, the sight of him rendering me speechless and overriding my overwrought mind. His cough breaks my ogling, and my cheeks heat at being caught staring.

“I’m ready,” I reply in a rasp, getting up. He moves towards me, taking a towel off the heated rail and helping me out of the bath, wrapping the warm towel around me.

“Let’s get you to bed, you need to rest.” His large hands rub the towel over my skin, making sure every inch is dry before he hangs it back up and leads me into the bedroom.

The bed is freshly made, the duvet back on it, and I see he’s even put out some of my favourite PJs; an oversized T-shirt and fluffy bed socks. A small chuckle falls from my lips when I see which T-shirt it is.

“What’s so funny,Kotenok?” he asks, a single brow raised even as his lips tilt up into a smile.

“Do you know what this means?” I question, letting go of his hand to pick up the T-shirt before slipping it over my head.

“No…”

I glance down, laughing again. It’s a picture of several book spines, flowers surrounding them with the words ‘Just buy me books and tell me to STFUATTDLAGG.’

“It’s an acronym…” I start, that stupid blush heating my cheeks again.

“And?” he questions, bending down to help me put the socks on. I belatedly realise he’s given me no knickers, though I can’t say I’m too sad given I hope he’ll be in bed with me. Evangeline gives a weak protest, still a little sore even after my hot bath, but if more sexy time with Nik is on the table, I’m taking it.

“It means, shut the fuck up and take this dick like a good girl.” I bite my lower lip as he stills. It was a joke T-shirt one of the girls got me for my birthday, knowing my love for naughty romance novels, and one that I never explained to my father. His head raises and the fire in his eyes burns hot enough to scald me.

“Time for bed,Solnishko,” he whispers, taking my hand once more and leading me to the side of the bed.

“Will you stay with me?” I ask as I get in, hearing his hissed breath behind me when I crawl to the opposite side, flashing all the goods at him. Good, he can feel as desperate as I currently do.

“For a little while,” he answers, climbing in beside me and immediately pulling me close. For a second, I worry what will happen when he leaves. Will Sergi or one of his men come into my room? Then he pulls me closer, and I know that he’ll never let anyone hurt me. It’s a truth that I know deep in my bones; Nik will protect me no matter what. I snuggle into his chest, my finger playing with the ink marking his body.

“Will you tell me about your tattoos?” I ask, my eyes already threatening to close as exhaustion sweeps over me. His body stiffens.

“One day, maybe. They tell you why I’m not a good man, why I don’t deserve you.” His voice drifts over me as I lose the battle, my lids closing as sleep pulls me under.

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