Page 87 of Tangled in Knots

“Then stop being a victim!” Morris yells back at me. “Get mad, strong, come and beat the fuck out of me. All I see is a sad, small girl. Where’s the goddamn fire?”

“That girl is dead,” I rasp, feeling as if I’m going to collapse from the outburst of words. “If you had any feelings for that person, it’s a shame you killed her just as much as you did the alphas whose necks you snapped.”

Forcing myself to walk, I almost trip over my feet as I turn into the alley. I ignore his pained scream from the street and as I make my feet continue to move forward, I acknowledge how much I pushed myself today. I need to rest and then study tomorrow before I go back to work.

It’s going to be an endless cycle of exhaustion, but it’ll allow me to do what Morris said. I’m not doing it because the beta told me to, though. I want to be a better, stronger version of myself. I need to build myself up, because no one else can do that work for me.

Knocking on the door to the shelter, I wait for Hazel to open it, my body vibrating with sadness and also anger. I definitely don’t feel numb. I’m pissed all the way off.

I will never go crawling back to Pack Dresmond. If they want me badly enough, they need to crawl through fire for me and show me the evidence of their scars. Even then, I may decide that walking around with a part of my soul outside of my body is a better option.

Damon is a glittering reminder of what one night’s consequences can yield. Omegas crave bites and to be possessed. Instead, I found a demon filled with a lot to say and the emotions to match.

My life will never be the same.Hazel opens the door with wide eyes as she gazes at me, but I shake my head, brushing away the wet shit on my face.

“The past came to say hello, and I told it to go fuck itself,” I whisper before brushing past her to get ready for bed.

It’s going to be another long day tomorrow too.

CHAPTER 20

1 Week Later

MORRIS

I’ve been following Adira from afar every night this week. She can tell when I’m watching her, but is completely fucking oblivious to other people. It’s incredibly frustrating. The only good thing that has come from her seeing me last week is that she now carries a stun gun in her hand when she walks home, instead of in her coat pocket.

I have no idea if she knows how to use it or who gave it to her, but it seems to deter people. I’ve watched them walk closer to her and then veer away when she walks under a streetlight, because they see the weapon in her hand. I fucking hate this damn city and all the predators. I had no idea it was so hard to be an omega until now.

She’s so vulnerable. The least I can do is take care of her from afar. If I stay far enough back, she doesn’t notice me.

I have a lot of time now that Jed is working on gathering influence and allegiance before we move to get rid of his fatherand his pack. Cutting the head off the serpent only goes so far if there are other money hungry people who want to take over.

It’s going to take some time to amass the support, but it’ll be worth it. Jed wants to ensure that no one will move against us.

Anyone we know who won’t be happy with the change of leadership will also be razed in the fire of our wrath. Kane doesn’t have much patience, so he’s taken up running and is regularly beating the shit out of his body at a local boxing gym in between meetings.

The psychotic rottweiler energy is eating him alive. Apparently this gym doesn’t take many people outside of the boxing industry, but the owner took pity on his crazy ass.

Damon, on the other hand, is desperate for any news about how Adira is doing. We need to find something for him to do before he loses his damn mind. None of us are doing well with the fruits of our decisions.

I can’t sleep, my nightmares driving me out of the warm bed next to Jed and Kane to walk Adira home from work without her knowing.

After her reaction to seeing me, I know she can’t handle it. I want to protect her mind as well as her body. Hearing her tell me her soul is torn apart and the raw emotion in her voice made me want to die.

Except, death would be too simple. I have people who depend on me.

My alphas need their omega. Even if I ultimately walk away despite Jed’s claim on me at the end of this, I need to know they’re whole and will be alright.

Sneaking into our rental every night my pack is home has become my new ritual. It blows my mind that her boss has her working every night until closing, unless she’s asking for these shifts.

Adira shivers in her coat when she walks home from work each night, and it makes me want to kill something.

She deserves the world, but we can’t give it to her. It’s enough to give me another bitter spoonful of self loathing.

I’m muttering under my breath as I open the door on the bottom floor of the building slowly, only to find Jed leaning against the wall, waiting for me. I guess I’m not very successful at sneaking around.

“You’re either cheating on us or stalking a pretty little omega,” he drawls. I haven’t so much as glanced at anyone else, since we got together eight years ago and he knows it.

---