Page 33 of Unravel Me

“How about before that, Ivy? Has that ever crossed your mind? How about, “Hey, Sawyer, I want to go to culinary school in California instead of going to U-Dub and living together. How can we make that work? You didn’t even give me a chance!” I know my voice is raising at this point, but fuck. She left me. I know I want to focus on moving past all of this, but damn if it isn’t difficult to hear all of it.

“Answer me this then, Ivy. Do you really think I would have done anything but support you? Do you think I would have kept you from reaching any of your dreams?”

“I don’t know. We were kids for fuck’s sake!”

Wrong answer. This time I lean forward over the bed and grab her face between both of my hands, forcing her to look directly in my eyes.

“What did I tell you about saying that?”

“It’s the truth,” she spits.

“Don’t push me, Ivy. Or I’ll be forced to remind you exactly what’s always been between us. You think it’s just gone? Do you think any amount of time could change our connection? You may be hurting right now, but don’t forget that I knew your body first. I see how flushed you are with me this close to you, how your skin just broke out in goosebumps when I touched you, how you shifted your legs closer together.”

I lean closer, ghosting my lips over hers before whispering into her ear, “Tell me, butterfly, if I touched your pussy right now, what would I find? Would you be dripping wet for me?”

“Sawyer . . .” she says, barely a whispered breath. Her chest rises and falls while her eyes shoot back and forth between mine.

“That’s what I thought. Don’t say that shit again or I promise I’ll remind you.”

Chapter 13

IVY

Holy. Shit.

I lift my fingers to my lips, swiping two of them back and forth while I sit on Sawyer’s bed, stunned.

“Tell me, butterfly, if I touched your pussy right now, what would I find?”

He strokes his hand across his short beard and ticks his jaw before bringing his eyes back up to mine, as if he were re-hearing the same thing, shocked by his own words. With all the madness of the evening, I haven’t properly taken him in. He’s changed so much. His rich brown hair is mussed, like running his hands through it is a common occurrence. There is no arguing thathe is all man now. His body has filled out in the best places. It’s clear that he works hard to stay in shape, I wonder if he’s still boxing his brothers. His biceps strain against the navy blue henley that fits his body like a glove, his forearms thick and veiny.

I was always putty in Sawyer’s hands. There was something about being swallowed up into his vortex that emptied my brain of all rational thought. All I saw, heard, and felt was him. And now? Hearing the deep timbre of his voice say those filthy words, his warm breath caressing my ear and down my neck, his big hands holding my face exactly where he wants me—my core pulses and throbs in need. I can’t deny that he’s right. No matter how much time has passed, that pull to be swept up in him hasn’t changed. We may be strangers now, but our cores recognize each other as if they are two halves of a whole.

This undeniable connection.

A tether that lights me on fire, a flame that only he can stoke. Even after all this time, just being in close proximity to him makes me feel more than I have in years. It burns brighter the closer he is to me, the longer he looks at me, the more he touches me. It’s like I’ve been asleep and seeing him again has jump-started my heart. How did I walk away from him?

“Get some sleep, Ivy. You’ve had a long day.”

His voice startles me out of my thoughts. I watch him as he walks toward the open door of his bedroom.

“Where are you going?” I ask, slightly confused and not wanting him to leave.

“To the couch.”

“Sawyer, you don’t have to sleep on the couch.”

“But I do. We have a lot to process and we aren’t going to do that lying next to each other. The last thing I want is more separation from you, Iv, trust me. But at least this time I’m choosing it and I know where you’ll be when I wake up.”

His words, although true, sting. Fresh tears prick my eyes and I do my best to blink them away. He walks back over to the side of the bed and pushes my hair behind my ears before grasping my jaw again in his large hands. He tilts my head back so I’m forced to look into his eyes.

“No more tears. Rest. We’ll talk more in the morning. You may think that you have to figure everything out on your own, but you don’t. You have people here in this town who have always loved you, Ivy. You can have whatever life you want, as long as you’re living it for yourself. Not your mother. Not me. Yourself.” His voice is gentle, almost pleading with me. As if the way I’m treating myself and the way I’ve been living all these years is causing him pain. Not pain for how it affects him, but pain seeing me this way.

His words hit home.

He uses the pads of his thumbs to wipe the stray tears from under my eyes before leaning down and pressing his perfectly warm lips to my forehead. I close my eyes and take the first breath of steady air in what feels like an eternity. A calmness washes over me. He releases me before I’m ready and returns to the door. He places his hand on the side of the door frame and drops his chin to his chest for a moment before looking back over his shoulder at me.

“Be here when I wake up, baby. Please.”