Page 29 of Snow River

On her way out the door, Molly snapped her fingers.“Almost forgot.Who were you yelling at for being a coward?”

“Oh…” Something told her not to explain—some strong warning that seemed to come from the direction of the living room.“It must have been something from my dream.I can’t even remember it now.”

Clearly, Molly didn’t believe her, but she nodded and turned to go.Lila hated lying to her friends, and tried her hardest not to.But sometimes it was just kinder.How would Molly react to the news that apparently the spirit of the murder victim Allison Casey still clung to that dress displayed in the living room where she was sleeping?

“I could use your help with something,” she said, loving how Molly’s face brightened.

“Anything.”

“When the Snow River Murders happened back in the eighties, there must have been official records, right?Police reports, coroner’s reports, that sort of thing?”

“Sure, it’s not like that was the Dark Ages.Some of it might not be digitized, depending on how tech-savvy the local authorities are.Want me to dig it up for you when I’m in Blackbear?”

“You could do that?”

“Sure.I’m meeting Sam in Blackbear, and he still has a good relationship with the FBI from when he was working with them.They would have been involved since there were multiple victims.”

“Thank you, Molly.Tell Sam thanks too.”

“Is there a reason you’re curious about the case?”

“Who wouldn’t be?Especially considering one of the victims lived here.”

Molly shivered.“Please don’t remind me.I have to block that out every time I stay over.”

And that was exactly why Lila didn’t want to tell Molly who she’d been calling a coward.Maybe some people were just too ‘sensitive’ to handle certain information.

Smiling at her own internal joke, Lila snuggled back under the covers—a heavy quilt and two comforters.As good of a friend as Molly was, there were some things she would never understand.

Like why Lila had reacted to kissing Bear as if she’d just touched a hot stove.

If Molly heard the story of their blistering kiss, she would urge Lila to take the next step.To open her mind to the possibility of some kind of relationship with Bear.

It would be easy for her to say that.All of her friends would probably say the same thing.Take a chance.You can do this.It’s worth the risk.They’d all opened their hearts to love, and all of them were now sublimely happy with the results.

But they hadn’t seen what Lila had during that kiss.They hadn’t felt what she’d felt.They didn’t know what she now knew.

She’d sensed a wounded boy.Deep scars.Love and kindness that went so deep, but that had been betrayed over and over.As they’d kissed, emotions had flooded through her.They belonged to him, she knew, because she’d experienced that kind of transference before.Alongside them were a few images—a dark-haired boy alone in a dirty apartment, wondering how long until someone came back.A younger Bear, hands linked behind his back, listening with head bowed as his superior flung lies at him.Breaking bad news to a heartbroken Alaska Native family.

What did it all mean?

Bear was so much more than what he showed the world.He deserved the best of everything, especially when it came to love.Someone like her, who never stuck around, who was only here because some strange impediment kept her from leaving, would be a terrible match for him.She couldn’t trust herself to be what Bear needed.

She cared about him too much to be one more betrayal in his life.

15

Ever since heand Lila had kissed, they’d kept their communication focused on work and the Snow River case.Bear didn’t understand it, but if that was what Lila wanted, he’d respect it.

The vandalism at the Community had rattled the entire town.It turned out that Oil Can was right.No one wished ill on them.Everyone who came into The Fang wanted to throw out ideas about who could be behind it.And they all had ideas about where Bear should focus.

“You should talk to that new couple that moved into Stony’s old place, that homestead out past the airstrip.Who’d be crazy enough to live next to that noise?”Trader John had barely ordered his usual before launching into his rant of the day.“Think about it.You move here all the way from Seattle, Washington for the peace and quiet, then you buy the loudest goddamn place in the entire Wrangells.”

“A lot of people say it’s louder living next to the river,” Bear pointed out as he poured out a pint of Guinness.Trader John limited himself to alcoholic drinks only on odd days of the week, with Monday marking Day One.

“I say they need investigated.”

Bear set the mug in front of him.“You want me to investigate a young couple who just moved here for pouring corn syrup on the floor of an old train station they probably don’t even know exists?I heard they have a baby.Think they brought the kid with them?”