Page 56 of Never Say Yes To A Stranger

She shoves me away, then pulls me back for a real hug. “Brat? Brat? I’ll show you brat.”

She’s three years younger than I am, but after high school, she worked odd jobs and didn’t want to give up her friends or a more vibrant nightlife than I ever had. I won’t say she’s a partier, or she won’t grow up, or that she’s irresponsible because she’s not any of those things. She’s just taking longer than I did to find her path, and that’s perfectly fine. I knew what I wanted to be when I was ten years old, and I went for it so hard that I graduated early. Sometimes, especially with all that’s happened, it’s hard to believe I’m only twenty-five.

Taking my hand, Katie pulls me out of the kitchen, waving our parents off over her shoulder. “I just want to see the barn cats,” she says. “We got here too late last night, and I keep getting promised that one of them is an absolute unit.”

As I slip into my hairy slides, I flush at how I used Beau’s words with my family last night. Yeah, even out here, I didn’t totally give up on fashion. I remember how Beau’s nose crinkled when he saw these ridiculous, wonderful, pink, and impractical shoes. I shake the memory off. It seems like that’s all I ever do—shake off images of him. He’s a haunter, all right. A full-on freaking ghost.

“Tell me about him,” Katie demands as we walk to the barn. She’s got a pair of huge rubber boots on. I’m not even sure how she fit those into her luggage. They’re green, industrial-looking, and a total overkill, but exactly what my sister would pack to be prepared for the country. My freaking goodness, I love her. I love my parents. The giant ache in my chest hasn’t quite evaporated yet, even though they’re going to be here for a week.

It’s going to take me another few days for the reality of them being real and being here to truly sink in. I guess it’s half trauma and half disbelief that this nightmare is finally coming to a close for me. I’ve lived someone else’s life for a year, but it’s kind of been my life, too. I’ve learned how to be two different people. I’ve learned an entirely new skill set, different passions, and a new way to survive. It wasn’t horrible, other than going on the run and having to give up everything I loved about my old life, as well as not being able to see my family or friends. But the rest?

I breathe in the sweet smell of hay after pulling open the barn door.

Both cats rush at us as I take a scoop of food out of the container on the shelf. “Sorry, I forgot to bring treats. I promise I’ll come back with something. Tuna, probably.”

They both meow their heads off, eat a few crumbles, and then come racing over. Katie plops down on one of the bales, laughing as she gets double cat-mobbed. They both shove their wet noses into her palms, her neck, and her cheeks. They’re normally not so enthusiastic about strangers, but she probably smells like me after being in the house all night. Even if she doesn’t, she’s my blood and literally one of my favorite human beings ever.

After the cats finally tone it down, and a few minutes later pretend like we’re not even here, all cattitude and perfect feline indifference, Katie puts her hand on my arm. “You still haven’t said anything.”

I sigh. “I’m not sure what there is to say.”

She’s pure evil with all that burning curiosity, but there’s humor lurking under it. She knows I’m hurting, and she wants to help in any way she can. “Was he hunky?”

“Oh, terribly,” I deadpan. She’s not put off by the dryness of my tone.

“Excellent. You look like you banged him.”

“Katie! What the hell?” I gasp.

She giggles and waves a hand but refuses to let me off the hook. “It’s not the end of the world. So what if you had crazy sex with your bodyguard slash undercover agent dude? That’s hot. You were out here all by yourself for alongtime. You probably needed to end the dry spell.”

I shake my head. “Good freaking goodness.”

She frowns at me. “The problem isn’t the hot sex. It’s that I think you fell for him, the fact that he was kind of a douche notwithstanding.”

Ugh. Denial isn’t going to get me anywhere. Not with my little sister. I might be good at clothes, but she’s a genius at people. She should pursue that. She’d be great at it if that’s what she wanted. I’m not one of those people who has an easy time keeping everything jammed up inside. It’s almost a relief to let it all out.

“I’m not sure what I am. Still kind of mad, still a little sad, but still missing him anyway. And yeah, it wasn’t just the…um, well, the physical aspect I miss. It’s him. But he’s the kind of person who needs to realize for himself that the world is a problem, but it’s not his biggest problem. His problem is the way he sees it and reacts to it. He’s had a lot of pain in his life, and he doesn’t want to let himself feel it. He thinks breaking isn’t strength, and feeling anything is silly. I know he does, but he won’t admit it, even to himself. He wants to just be one of those strong people who keeps moving forward, but he thinks doing that means cracking himself wide open.”

“Butt cracking himself?” Katie snickers.

I roll my eyes. “He told me I was obsessed with butts. What I should have said was that it runs in the family.”

“Definitely. There’s nothing wrong with a good butt joke, and how on earth would we call anyone a jerkface without inserting some kind of bathroom humor in there? It’s just not as fun.”

“I pretty much told him that,” I say with a chuckle.

“Goodness. If he can’t accept a good butt-laced insult, then I’m not sure he’s the one, Sam.”

Sam. It feels so, so good to hear my real name spoken out loud by someone who has known me my whole life. Yes, even if Sam is short for Samandra. I might not ever look at my real name with such disdain again. It’s more of a privilege to be able to even use it.

“I don’t know if he’s the one. That’s a little heavy.”

“You won’t know if you don’t get in contact with him again,” Katie wisely says.

“I don’t have his number. I don’t…it’s not like he’s one of those people you can just track down and call up. He probably goes to pretty great lengths to keep his privacy private.”

“Hmm.” She pretends to think deeply. “Despite the fact that he was kind of a catfishing turdstink, you did meet him on that hot bedding website.” Yeah, my family does know about that. I was always straight up and honest with them. They were already worried about me. I wasn’t making things any worse with the hot bedding thing. At least not that much worse. “You could try to message him on there.”

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