Page 63 of Another Postcard

The hospital had letme stay with her for the entire week she’d been there. Noah and Matteo had brought me clothes and Simon and Sasha had taken turns bringing food, all of them eager to visit Brooklynn. It wasn’t the hospital kicking me out, it was Brooklynn.

I ran a hand over Brooklynn’s head, down her hair, then stood and leaned over to place a kiss on her temple. “I’ll go for now,” I murmured. “But, you and I are far from over and we’ll talk about the band tomorrow. I love you, sweetheart.” I held my breath for a moment, hoping, but she didn’t say it back and the air rushed out as my heart stuttered.

“Signore?” the nurse called softly. Her expression was filled with compassion, but she waved me toward the door. With one last touch to her head, I reluctantly left. When I reached the lobby, I stopped at the front desk to ask when visiting hours started. She gave me the time and I thanked her before exiting through the sliding glass doors. I sent a quick text to Erin and 2.0 asking one of them to send a car for me. I didn’t feel like flagging a taxi and I had ridden there in the ambulance.

While I waited in the parking lot, I pulled out my cell and called Noah.

“How is she?”

“Talking about quitting.”

“Fuck,” he sighed.

“Yeah. Pretty much how I’m feeling, except with a lot more pain in the vicinity of my heart.”

Noah was silent for a moment. “Wait, quitting the band or your relationship?”

I clenched my teeth, stifling the need to yell at no one in particular. I felt like an animal that needed to howl in pain. “Both.”

“Son of a bitch.”

“We’ll all go with you tomorrow and talk to her.”

“No,” I sighed. “I don’t want to overwhelm her. Let me talk to her first.”

“If you’re sure.” He sounded doubtful and it irritated the fuck out of me.

“I’m sure,” I snapped as a black sedan pulled to a stop in front of me. “Car’s here.” I ended the call and opened the door, climbing in and practically collapsing on the seat. I was fucking drained, but I wasn’t looking at much rest. I’d discovered an inability to sleep well without Brooklynn in bed with me since the night of our fight. I just hoped she would be in a better mood tomorrow after she got some sleep.

But, the next morning when I arrived at eight AM on the dot, I tried to sign in to visit her and was told that she wasn’t taking any visitors. I must have stared at the woman dumbly for several minutes because eventually she waved her hand in my face. “Signore? Pronto?”

I shook my head and stepped back, still a little stunned that Brooklynn had basically banned me from her. If I was being honest with myself, I had expected what Brooklynn liked to call a “movie moment.” She would wake up and tell me she loved me and all would be forgiven and we’d ride off into our happily ever after. Instead, she effectively shut all of us out of her life. Whoever said that tragedy brings people closer together was a fucking idiot. Complete bullshit.

I stewed at the hotel the rest of the day trying unsuccessfully to come up with some kind of game plan. Depression was starting to settle over me as I wondered if I’d truly fucked this up for good. Simon called to see if I needed to get good and drunk. I considered it, but it would only delay the inevitable. The heartbreak would have to be dealt with eventually, might as well get a jump start on it. My door suddenly opened and Sasha came marching into my room, looking at me with disgust.

“Really? Sitting around in the dark feeling sorry for yourself?” She planted her hands on her hips and glared at me. “A couple of stupid idiots, the two of you. You know that? Do I have to doeverythingfor you people?” She huffed and stomped over to flip the lights on, making me wince. “Serves you right,” she muttered under her breath as she moved to a chair and flopped down into it. “You just going to be a pussy and let her walk away?”

“What exactly do you want me to do, Sasha? She won’t even let me near her.”

“Yeah, you’re a colossal fuck up, Matthews. Still, you’ve got some good qualities, or I wouldn’t love you like a brother.” Her voice softened and she reached out to grab my hand, giving it a squeeze. “Come on, dude. You really going to just let the best thing that ever happened to you, to us, run away?”

Something in her voice perked my ears and I cocked my head as I studied her. “You sound like you’ve come up with a plan.”

“Well. Ideas more like.” She let go of my hand and leaned back in chair with a smug smile making it look remarkably like she was a queen sitting on her throne. “First of all, I don’t want you to let her get away, but you do need to give her some space.” She leaned forward conspiratorially. “Then…”

I listened and wasn’t sure about some of her ideas, but I sure as fuck didn’t have any better ones.

“What makes you the expert on this?” I asked, only half kidding. “You can’t even deal with your own fucked up relationship.”

She glared at me. “You want my help or not?”

I sighed. “Yeah.”

It about killed me, but I took Sasha’s advice and gave Brooklynn some space. We sent out a press release that she was leaving the tour temporarily for medical reasons. Speculation ran rampant, the assumptions that she was pregnant hurt my heart more than I expected them to. It wasn’t that I was ready to start a family, but my greatest fear was that I would never have the opportunity to have one with Brooklynn.

I mostly adhered to Sasha’s suggestions. But, I did send her flowers to have waiting for her when she got home. In the note, I told her that our story was an unfinished song and someday, we’d have no choice but to give in to the music and follow the melody where ever it led.

We continued with our tour and every time a show ended, with the noticeable absence of our duet, I fought the desire to drop everything and go get my girl. I didn’t completely leave her life though. I meddled when necessary and planned for the right day. The one when I would claim her for good.