Page 49 of Hold Me Before You Go

Eventually, the warmth provided by my blood pumping wasn’t enough, and I was freezing, my body shivering as my teeth clattered. I was no longer running, slowly shoving my legs through the snow as I kept my head bent, trying to shield my face from the wind whipping around me. My sweater did nothing to protect me from the elements. I felt naked, exposed to the cold and bitter hell that nature was giving me.

I couldn’t feel the bottom half of my legs anymore, and the sky was getting darker by the second. It would be nightfall soon, and the temperature had been dropping since I decided to make a run for it hours ago.

I was very, very tired.

The jerky was gone, and I was running onnothing, the fumes having dissipated hours ago.

I’d crossed over the first pasture, going into the next after having to step over a fallen gate post. Whoever owned this land must own the entire state. The wind slowed then, giving me a mere second to look up. I halted, finding myself standing at the opening of a small, tree-covered section of the pasture. I blinkedonce, then twice, trying to decide if my mind was playing a trick on me—again.

I was standing in front of a graveyard.

The pine trees that were dotted all around it provided an umbrella of sorts, leaving some of the dead grass visible while the strong branches held up the snow. Patches of faint, dull light sank through the tops of the trees, giving me a few of the old headstones.

The wind picked back up again, and I made my decision. I stepped into the trees, heading straight for the first headstone. The grave wasn’t covered in snow, the dead, brown grass untouched by winter. I stepped out of the snow and winced at the sight of my feet. My toes were a deep red, and I felt like I was walking on pins and needles. But there was nothing I could do for them now. Taking my shoes from me was a smart decision on Brandon and Monica’s part. They didn’t think I would run away barefoot, but they knew nothing of the hells I’d survived, how desperately I craved freedom.

The wind howled all around the trees as I rounded the gravestone, sinking to my knees in front of it. I wrapped my arms around myself as I looked up at the headstone.

Nancy Cross.

Loving Mother and Friend

My eyes dropped to the date—she passed last year.

“I-I-I s-s-sorr-y-y,” I pushed out weakly through my chattering teeth. I needed to use Nancy’s headstone as a shield. I pressed as much of myself as I could against the rough stone and pulled the gloves off. They belonged to a man, judging by the size and I thanked the heavens for that. I slipped my toes into each glove and tucked my legs under me, pulling my hands into the sleeves of my sweater and wrapping my arms around myself, tucking my chin in.

The wind howled, but Nancy helped block it, and I was grateful.

Thank you, Nancy, whoever you were.

Time continued the pass as the day came to an end.

I was tired, cold, and thirsty. I’d been out here for hours, and there was no sign of human life. I didn’t even see any animals.

Stay awake, baby. Stay awake for me.

“C-can’t,” I whispered, barely hearing my own voice.

My eyes closed, and I was slowly drifting off, knowing that, in my dreams, I’d find warmth.

I’d find Grayson.

Again, the wind settled, and I heard something in the distance, an engine or something.

“H-help.”

My voice was gone, my throat burning.

Slowly, I lifted my head, and there, in the distance, I saw a light. It was getting closer and closer as the rumbling sound grew louder by the second. Suddenly, a new kind of fear took over, and I pressed up against the headstone, trembling.

The single light turned into two, and I recognized the shape of headlights.

They found me.

They fucking found me.

The vehicle stopped just outside the tree line, and I blinked, my eyelids heavy. Snow, so much snow. Cold. I was so cold. My body wanted sleep. I wanted sleep. I wanted warmth…

Exhaustion took over, and I tried fighting it, but I couldn’t keep my eyes open.

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