Page 124 of Hold Me Before You Go

Don’t run. It will only make things worse, and I don’t want to see you, your team, or Carrie get hurt.

-James

“When she gets back,” I answered, dropping the tablet on her desk.

“You should’ve killed them,” my friend said.

I looked out the window. “I know.”

But what kind of man would that have made me? I needed to be better for her, my sunshine.

“You could run,” he continued.

“That’s not the kind of life I want to give her,” I murmured.

“So, you’ll give her this one? One filled with loneliness and pain?” he fired back, growling at the end.

“It’s better than us being on the run, not settling anywhere, looking over our fucking shoulders, Mags,” I bit off, my shoulders tensing. “I can’t fucking do that to her! I can’t ask her to give up everything for me, not after the life she’s lived.You damn well know that!” My words echoed through the warm house, bouncing off the walls.

Mags sighed on the other end of the line. “We’ll keep an eye on her. You have my word, Grayson,” he said softly.

My gut twisted. The tension left my shoulders.I didn’t even have to fucking ask.

“I owe you, Mags. For so damn much, and I’m sorry.” I bent my head, shame covering me now. I didn’t fulfill my promise to him. I never go to—

“Don’t apologize to me when you’re about to go to prison,” he clipped. “I don’t want to hear that shit, Gray. I’m more upset that you finally fucking found it, and it’s being ripped away from you.”

My happiness.

Without looking at my desk, I left the pink office and headed into the kitchen. There was nothing I could say to that. Thankfully, Mags asked a different question, moving on from my failures.

“Where’s the rest of the team?”

“Heading to St. Louis with the Hales,” I answered. “Hayes is still wrapping things up in Vegas.”

“Christ, I can’t believe he went into that hellhole. Those Black Mist fuckers are demons.”

I was taken aback. “How in the hell do you know about Black Mist?”

“Lance gambled away is fucking savings a few years back on a fucking college. Lawson came to Denver, pleading. Now, both of them have to work at Hallow Ranch to pay off the debt.”

“Fucking Denver.”

Mags chuckled. “Fucking Denver,” he parroted roughly.

I pulled out the ingredients for the dinner I was making tonight, hoping with everything in my soul, it would be memorable for Carrie. I planned spending on more night withmy woman. I’d hold her while she cried, make love to her until we were both spent, and when she fell asleep, I’d be gone.

The silence between me and the cowboy dragged on for a few more minutes. I heard things moving on his end as he did on mine. We didn’t have to say anything, and we took comfort in being present in each other’s day, even if only for a few minutes. I was searing the chicken when he broke the silence.

“I’ll call you every month on the tenth,” he vowed. “And if they don’t let me speak to you, I’ll just keep calling.”

My eyes closed as emotion welled in my chest, making it hard to breathe.

As I opened my mouth to tell him he was like a brother to me, the kitchen window shattered and pain ripped through my shoulder from behind, jerking me forward. I looked down, finding blood soaking through my shirt, oozing from the gunshot. Everything happened quickly.

Another shot rang out, hitting me in the leg. I winced in pain and managed to switch the stove off before I turned and ducked. My gun was in the living room. I just had to get—

Three more rounds fired off.

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