Page 13 of Little Psycho

Maybe I can find a way to make it up to Calista to erase all the pain that I caused.Would she give me a chance?Would she even forgive me?It was a risk I was willing to take.I had already lost everything, so I know I have nothing else to lose.

With that thought in mind, I follow the CO’s brisk pace, carrying the weight of my past and the uncertainty of what lies ahead.

When I get outside, shoved through the prison gates to where my freedom awaits, I feel lost as fuck.I have no idea what to do with myself or where the fuck I’m going.Heading for the prison bus, the sound of a car horn in the distance rips my focus off the ground to just beyond the other side of the bus.

There, I see Dom and Ash leaning against Dom’s black Lexus, waving me over.Clutching the cheap, clear plastic bag that holds my belongings, I walk over, feeling the itch of familiarity with each step.

“What the fuck are you guys doing here?”I ask, taking a cigarette from Ash’s outstretched hand.

“We got a call from your old man telling us you were being released today,” Dom says nonchalantly, handing me a lighter.

They both look different than I remember, but looking in their eyes, I can tell that they’re the same broken boys I left behind over a year ago.They were affected by the whole Calista incident just as much as I was, but their fathers didn’t see the need to have them thrown in prison to keep tabs on them, unlike mine.

Getting in the backseat, I light my cigarette, relishing the lightheaded rush I get from the first inhale.I try to relax as we pull away from the prison, but the fear of the unknown still holds me back from completely being free.

“Have you talked to Cali?”I blurt out, knowing how much of a sore subject she is between the three of us.

We were best friends since elementary school, attached at the hip.Cali was my first kiss… and Dom’s… and Ash’s, and honestly, the fucking love of my life too.Her thirteenth birthday didn’t only change her life; it changed all of ours, especially when she was ripped away, leaving a gaping hole inside of us.

Dom and Ash share a look, then shake their heads, despair and unease filling the atmosphere.

“No,” Dom says, staring blankly ahead of him at the winding road, gripping the wheel so tight that his knuckles begin to turn white.“Her parents still have her locked up.

And then it dawns on me—today is her twenty-third birthday; that’s why my father had me released today.

“Don’t tell me,” I seethe, already feeling the cravings grow inside of me, the need to numb myself for what’s to come.

“Her mother is throwing another birthday party for her...tonight,” Ash whispers, his voice cracking.“My father called me and told me that I had an invite waiting for me.

“Me too,” Dom adds, pushing his foot against the pedal a little harder.

The hold our fathers have on us is fucking crazy.Men in positions of power are scary and intimidating enough, but our fathers are over the top.Holding our lives and freedom in their hands, they control us completely, and at twenty-four, I still haven’t found a way to break free from my father’s clutches.But I will.I’ll show Calista that I’ve changed—that I’m not the same man who hurt her all those years ago.I won’t let this cycle of pain, abuse, and control continue any longer.

As I take another long drag from my cigarette, I can feel the determination, the fire burning inside me.I’m ready to fight—to take that chance—because I’m ready to find a way back to Cali.

“Where are we going?”I ask without looking away from the blurry view of the trees flanking the side of the road.

“There’s a race tonight.We’re heading to the shop to make sure the cars are ready.”Ash winks, knowing how much being behind the wheel of my Supra helps me relax.

We’ve been street racing and making our way into the underground world of racing for some time now; it’s the only thing that makes us feel alive.The thrill of going over a hundred and the risk of getting caught behind the wheel does something for us, something we haven’t been able to get from anything else.

I lean my head back and close my eyes, thinking about my car...and, of course, Calista.

FIVE

BREAKING POINT

RUNRUNRUN—DUTCH MELROSE

CALISTA (23)

1.Mother

2.Father

3.Holden Graham—Senator

4.Gunnar

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