Page 66 of Unforgivable

“I mean, considering how I feel about you, I like to think I have excellent taste.” I meant it to be another joke, but Rhys' breath hitched and his eyes stopped my breathing in turn. The mixture of fear and hope in that purple-hued gaze struck me to my core. The space between us shifted, vibrating with an energy that wasn't there before.

I leaned closer without meaning to, some magnetic force drawing me to him that I was powerless against. I couldn't tear my eyes away from his, drowning in the emotion I saw there. Rhys' tongue darted out to wet his lips and my gaze fell to the glistening surface. God, I wanted to taste him. My mouth was dry, blood pounding in my ears, and I was convinced he could hear my heart thud against my ribcage.

He swallowed harshly, drawing my gaze down further. I had to fight not to go bobbing for his Adam's apple and take a bite out of it. A sharp intake of breath had me looking up. We were so close I could count the handful of faint freckles scattered over the bridge of his nose and the way the arch of one eyebrow twitched compulsively. I wanted to run my finger over it and soothe it, kiss every freckle I could find. Our breaths mingled together and suddenly I needed his lips like I needed air.

As soon as the thought pierced my brain, I saw the fear overtake all lust and desire in Rhys' eyes. His gaze shuttered and he yanked away from me, creating space that felt like a gaping chasm that couldn't be bridged. My gut clenched and I worried I'd gone too far.

“Cal, I'm sorry. I shouldn't—I didn't mean to—” Rhys stuttered, wringing his hands together anxiously. “I don't want to give you the wrong idea. I believe you when you say you want to be better and repair our friendship. But that's all I'm able to give you right now. We can try to be friends again, but…that's all we can be. I'm sorry.”

The regret and longing on his face contradicted his words, and I knew the fear was making the decision for him. This was the price I had to pay to keep him in my life. Even though the thought of never being more than friends with him fucking tore me up inside, I would gladly suck it up just to have him in some way.

Two months ago, I never would have imagined being in this position, hung up over a guy who didn't want to be with me and settling for friendship. Hawk would have said “fuck it” and gone out to find some new conquest to prove to himself he felt nothing.

But Cal couldn't bear the thought of losing someone who had become so integral to his life. Not again. I promised Rhys that he'donly get Cal from now on, so I would willingly compromise and be happy to have him as my friend. It gutted me, but it had to be enough.

“I get it, Rhys. I really do. You don't have to apologize,” I said gruffly. “I thought you were gone for good, so being friends seems like a good deal to me.”

He shot me a sad, sweet smile and I did my best to smile back, but it most likely looked stiff and unconvincing. I didn't want him to see just how much his words wrecked me because I'd been a selfish dick with him enough. He needed the best I could give him.

“So how about in honor of our renewed and improved friendship, we put onGame of Thronesand you show me why everyone gets all hot and bothered for that freak show?” I suggested, trying to clear the air of all tension and weirdness that lingered. Thankfully, Rhys took my idea and brightened instantly.

“Deal! I swear, four episodes in and you're going to kiss the ground I walk on for suggesting this show!”

“Wait, hold up! I'm the one who suggested it! You can't be taking credit for my damn ideas, Evans. Didn't your Gran teach you manners, you uncouth fucker?” I teasingly berated him.

“Language! It's your word against mine anyway and you're a disgraced ex-captain now, so who do you think they'll believe?” Rhys laughed and I let out an exaggerated gasp, bantering back and forth with him as we set up the show.

It was a balm to my soul, being with him like this. He was the missing piece that slotted back into my life effortlessly and I thanked all beings above for not losing him. But I couldn't help the thought that drilled at my head as we dove into the first episode and Rhys curled up on one end of my couch.

He'd teased that I'd kiss the ground he walked on, but I'd rather give everything I owned to kiss every inch of him until there was no breath left in my body. A far more depressing thought occurred to me that I'd never be given that chance, not now.

I'd finally gotten Rhys back as my friend, but he'd never bemine. Though I had the sinking feeling that wouldn't stop me from always being his.

19

CALLUM

Iyawned for the umpteenth time in the last hour, nearly unhinging my jaw in the process. I was in a heavy fog of exhaustion and stress over my upcoming finals. The library had become my reluctant second home and I was convinced my ass had left a permanent imprint on my usual chair. It would have been insufferable if not for the welcome distraction of a certain someone who kept me company the last several days.

As if conjured by my thoughts, Rhys plopped down on the chair opposite me. “I come bearing gifts,” he declared proudly, dropping a takeout bag from Whataburger on the table with a soft thud.

“If you tell me you have a double bacon cheeseburger in there, I'll name my firstborn after you,” I replied, my mouth already watering at the sinful aroma wafting from the bag. Rhys dug in the bag and revealed a thick burger wrapped in the recognizable yellow paper. I reached for it, but he yanked it away at the last second. The look of betrayal on my face had him cackling in his seat.

“Oh, did you think this was for you?” he asked, eyes wide in mock innocence. “I didn't realize you were hungry. Dang, if only I had brought extra…” He started to unwrap the burger and brought it to his mouth, but I lunged for him across the table. He squeaked and backed up just out of reach.

“Do not even play with me right now, Rhys Evans. I am starvingand a step away from eating my damn textbook. If that burger is not in my hand in two seconds, you're going to be in trouble and I'm going to end up on the nightly news,” I growled, eliciting another amused laugh from him. He smirked at me and finally forked it over.

“Geez, you get violent when you're hangry,” he quipped as I started inhaling the delicious, bacon-y goodness.Oh fuck, that is so good. Is it possible to orgasm from a cheeseburger? I give it thirty seconds before I prove that theory right.

I moaned around a mouthful of food and Rhys' face flushed with color, shifting in his seat. My cock twitched in my sweats seeing his reaction, but I shoved down the dirty thoughts that threatened to creep up. I had promised him to stick to the friendzone and I wouldn't let an errant boner ruin it. The last two weeks had been perfect between us, both of us falling into an easy rhythm of texting, hanging out and studying together.

It still amazed me that I never seemed to get sick of being around him so frequently. I had wondered if I was gaining a better tolerance for people, but I still seemed to get overstimulated and tired of hanging out with some of my teammates or even Griffin when he was around. Unsurprisingly, Rhys was the exception to the rule. He had been from the start.

The only real problem I had was how fucking horny I was all the time. I couldn't even remember the last time I had a hookup. Despite Rhys setting firm boundaries between us, even he couldn't stop his reactions to me. If I licked my lips, his eyes zeroed in on the movement. If I ran a hand through my hair, I felt his gaze sweep across my bicep. When I wore sweatpants, he'd blush so temptingly and unsuccessfully avoid looking at the outline of my dick. That might or might not have swayed my decision to wear sweats nine out of ten times we hung out.

I knew eventually I'd need to get out and find a fuck buddy to mess around with because jacking off only got you so far. But each time the idea randomly crossed my mind, a queasiness settled in my gut and I felt weirdly guilty. It was insane to experience guilt when Rhys and I weren't a thing, yet it didn't change that I felt it all the same.

“What final are you studying for now?” Rhys asked, pulling me from my troubled thoughts.

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