Page 36 of Sinful

I rubbed my eyes, the familiar nausea twisting through my insides.

“I continued killing for my father. I’ve killed so many people, specter. I became bored with it. Hundreds of the dead haunt me. I was growing up and had friends, though. Troubled ones. Stitches. Ashes. Sin. We became broken brothers bonded in our collective darknesses. I took solace in having them in my life. They broke up the ugly I lived in.”

“Mother wasn’t happy yet. She would kiss me goodnight each night and make me promise I’d get out. When I screwed up, my father would use her to punish me. I watched my father hurt her. I stood by, unable to do anything because it would end in her death. Death would have been a far kinder fate, but again, I was selfish and wanted my mother with me always. Love can make us do ugly things. Keeping my mother alive was one of them.”

I took a moment to brush a stray piece of Sirena’s dark hair away from her face.

“My mother took to staring into my eyes while she was beaten. Tears would streak down her cheeks. I’d cry with her. As I got older, her punishments, and mine, were worse. Men. So many men wanted her. She was so beautiful,” I whispered. “Even beaten and broken, she was still so breathtaking. My father sold her to high bidders. The men would have their way with her and then spit on her after. I’d watch her curl into a ball and cry softly. I’d go to my knees and hold her hand through her tears, just like she’d do for me.”

“‘Dante, please,’she’d whispered to me after one brutal night where four men had their way with her. They’d hurt her beyond words. She screamed. Threw up. They’d run their cocks through her sick and fucked her with it. And I was forced to fucking listen to it. Sick. Sick. So fucking sick.” My voice shook. “The night that happened, I realized I was hurting my mother more than saving her. There wasn’t a way out for either of us, and she didn’t deserve to suffer as she had been. So I went to her room later that night and lay in bed with her. I was fourteen.”

I drew in a breath in a pathetic way to calm myself for the next part.

“I whispered to her that I loved her. I kissed her. Held her. Told her how much she meant to me. I wanted to show her the love she deserved.” My hands shook.

Sirena widened her colorful eyes at me, her lips parted.

“She whispered against my ear, her voice barely there from all her screaming. Her words were, ‘Please, moy sladkiy d’yavol. Please.’” I cleared my throat. “I would never deny my mother the things she wanted. I moved so I was over her, her body beneath mine. ‘Let me go. Please. Let me go.’I can’t tell you how many times she’d tried to end her life over the years. Slash her wrists. Try to hang herself. Each time, she’d be found and brought back into our dark world. But I could give her this. I could do this for her.”

I reached into my boot and pulled my hunting knife out. I ran the blade along Sirena’s jaw, along her soft lips, down her throat, and over the tops of her breasts. Her breathing picked up.

“I kissed her forehead again. Her cheek. Held her. And pushed my blade deep inside her body. She let out a soft moan against my skin. She gripped my arms tightly as I continued to cling to her as she clung to me. As I continued to kill her she whispered, ‘Kak ad menya blagoslovil’. It means,how hell has blessed me.”I took a moment to collect myself before continuing with the next part.

“She stilled beneath me, a tear working its way from her eye and dripping onto her white pillowcase. Her blood was everywhere, even in my mouth. Beneath my nails. On my face. I swallowed it, hurting so much I didn’t think I’d ever heal. But it was the smile on her face which let me know she was at peace. That I’d finally saved her. I’d done it. I’d given her the freedom she’d been desperate for.”

“With that in mind,” I continued softly. “I took my knife and chose my favorite part of her. That was the rule. We take our favorite parts and make them part of us by feasting. I took my mother’s heart. She was pure in heart. My father came in and caught me holding it in my hands, her body having grown cold. I’d taken great care of her during my operation.”

“‘It took you long enough.’” I stopped moving my knife along Sirena’s breasts. “That’s what my father said to me. He walked past me and looked down at my mother’s mutilated body before he crawled onto her and fucked her one last time. I watched, satisfied she wasn’t there to hurt anymore.” I let my knife fall away from Sirena’s soft skin.

“He took her tongue, and we ate together that night. I went back later and took some of her skin and made my bracelet with it. Her heart is part of me now. I joke and tell the guys she’s my soft spot. And the bracelet. . .” I shrugged. “I always liked the way her skin was so soft. I like knowing she’s still with me, no matter how small a piece of her.”

Sirena’s bottom lip trembled. I moved my knife back to her breast and stopped it over her heart.

“If you ever run from me, I will find you and cut your heart from your chest and devour it,” I husked out. “Then I will fuck your dead body before I preserve you for eternity. Because my love is forever, specter. When I vow it, I mean it. I fucking love you, and you will always be mine.”

A tear leaked down her cheek before she was crying silently.

“Don’t cry,” I whispered. “And don’t run. I told you it was a bad story.” I licked her tears away, relishing the way she tasted.

I thought she’d pull away from me. I thought she really would run. Instead, her lips met mine in a deep, soul-shattering kiss. My knife fell from my hand, clattering to the hardwood floor at my feet. The monster inside took over, and I pushed my way into her tiny body, her scream of protest against my lips.

“Mine,” I growled as I forced my way inside. “Your body belongs to me. Not him. Get him out of your fucking head.” I shoved upward into her, making her tears flow harder. “This pussy is mine. Not fucking his. I will fuck you until you forget that night. Now fucking scream for me, Sirena.”

And she did.

Music to my fucking ears.

SIN

Icaught a glimpse of Siren for all of a moment before Cady swooped in on her. She’d barely made it across the courtyard. Weeks had passed. My heart clenched in my chest at that small glimpse. A pink hat atop her head. Her long black hair a wild tangle around her ankle-length pink puffy coat. Her mittens. Not gloves, because a girl as sweet as Siren wore mittens. The guys flanking her.

My spot empty.

I ground my teeth at the thought, hating I was having it and hating I was hating it. I wanted more than anything to go home and prove myself, but I also had self-loathing which didn’t seem to want to fuck off. I had a belief I didn’t deserve her, and it would ruin everything.

“Everything is already ruined,” Asylum said, smacking the back of his hand against my chest and taking a bite from a muffin he had. “Why not fix shit now so you can ruin it later?”

“Shut up,” I muttered, glancing at him. “And stop chewing so fucking loud.”