Page 71 of Jael

“You remind me of someone,” she said.

She wasn’t quite sure if she’d said the words out loud until Danny said, “Who?”

There was a man her dad had used her to humiliate. It hadn’t worked. Through the torture and threat of death, as she’d stood before him while he hung naked from a chain connected to the ceiling, he’d remained steady and unflinching.

“A man my father murdered. His name was Lucas McGregor. I was there when he told my dad that he forgave him. Then,naked and bleeding, he looked me right in the eye, and he told me he forgave me too.” Her last word came out choked, and she stared past Danny’s head, picturing the scene. It sent a chill down her spine. “He said Jesus could set us free if we’d reach out to him. All we had to do was ask for forgiveness. He said that right before my dad put a bullet in his head.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“I went to my room after that and trembled for hours. I don’t even know why. When I looked it up online, I only got as far as ‘sinners deserve death,’ and I couldn’t go farther. How could I stand before my maker and ask him for my life after what I’ve done?”

“But you can.”

“Maybe. I guess some souls are worth saving. I watched my dad murder men who were. But I’m beyond the reach of any god. No matter what price he paid.”

Danny’s eyes dropped, and he pulled his hand from her arm.

“I wish I knew how to change your mind,” he said.

“I’m not your responsibility.” But she wanted so much to be.

“You know what my life was like, and Jesus setmefree. I want you to know that freedom.”

She could see that he really did. It made her ache. That someone actually cared what happened to her soul. It was too much to resist any longer. She moved toward him and reached up to rest her hand softly on his face. His jaw was rough with stubble. She ventured closer, and his hand came up to rest on hers. He held it there for a moment before wrapping his fingers around hers and pulling her hand away.

“I can’t,” he said. But the roughness of his voice said the opposite.

She stepped back, knowing he was right to resist, but she still felt the sting of his rejection. “It’s my fault this time. I’m sorry.”She cleared her throat. “I’ve had too much to drink. You should probably take me home now.”

“You don’t understand.”

“I think I do. I misread your concern. You don’t have to explain.”

“You didn’t misread anything. But I won’t take advantage of you.”

“It’s not taking advantage when I practically throw myself at you. You’d think I would learn the first time.”

“Your dad’s just died, and—it’s bad timing.” He shook his head and looked away, leaving a lot unsaid. She understood then, even through the haze of everything that had happened, there was more he wasn’t telling her. Maybe his return wasn’t a surprise to everyone the way it had appeared. Maybe her dad had found him and invited him back, knowing that his time was close and that Danny would be the one to make sure his wishes were carried out. But then why would he tell her she didn’t have to marry Christopher? Nothing about the night made sense, but it didn’t have to. Danny had made himself clear.

“Take me home,” she said. “To my dad’s place. I’ll be staying there while I’m sorting through his things.”

“I’m really sorry?—”

“It’s been a long day. I just want to go home.”

They got into the car. “Jael, I?—”

“Please don’t. It won’t help. You do what you have to do. And I’ll do what I have to do.”

Neither one of them said another word, even after they pulled up outside her dad’s big, dark house.

“Is Sofia still there?” Danny said.

“Everyone that my father employed is still employed. Christopher and I will discuss how we can find places for them all. Artus has a large estate. He may be able to take on more employees.”

“And Sofia?”

“I’m hoping Christopher will be open to hiring Sofia for our house.”

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