I try not to think about how my cock is nestled against her entrance, or how hard I am despite my efforts not to get turned on by the way her dress hugs her curves, hints at the treasures underneath. She wants to talk. I want her to be happy. But damn. She looks so sexy sitting on top of me, so sweet as she gently teases, I can’t help but be aroused.
“First they get you naked.” I trace small circles along her inner thigh beneath her dress, stopping just short of where I want to go. “Then they claim you and mark you, so all the other males, especially dentists, know to stay away.”
Encouraged by her smile and the hitch of her breath, I run my finger along the edge of her panties.
“How are you going to mark me?” She rocks her hips over my cock, and I fight back a groan.
“Here.” I feather my fingertips along the slim column of her neck. “I’ll bite you here the way I used to.”
Natalie sucks in a sharp breath and tips her head to the side, as if inviting me to fulfill my promise. “Anywhere else?”
“Here.” I place a gentle hand on my tummy. “When you’re pregnant . . .”
I don’t know why I said that. Longing? A deep-seated desire to have a family to replace the one I lost? Regardless of how it escaped the walls I built to be able to make it through each day, I regret my words as soon as they drop from my lips. But it’s too late. Pain flashes across Natalie’s face, and in the time it takes me to reach for her, she’s gone.
My pulse pounds so hard I can’t hear for the roaring in my ears. Natalie scrambles back, pushing off the bed when only moments ago we were connecting again.
“A baby isn’t going to fix us.” She stares at me aghast. “This . . . ” She waves her hand vaguely around the room. “A few hours in a hotel together doesn’t mean everything is fine. I can’t have another baby, Sam. We can’t go through that pain again.”
Pain of loss. Pain of longing. Pain of indifference to my wife’s suffering, and my own need to heal. I want to give her my pain and take her own. I wanted to share it with my body and swallow it with my soul.
“The doctors said the chances of it happening again are almost nonexistent.” I push to sit, run a hand through my hair for lack of anything better to do with my hands now that Natalie has put some distance between us. “But it’s up to you. If you don’t want to have another baby, then I’ll respect your decision. Hell, until tonight, I didn’t want to try either. But when I thought I was going to lose you, something changed for me. I woke up, Natalie. I saw a life without you in it, a life without the family we always wanted to have. You and Ethan were the best things that ever happened in my life. I want that again, Natalie. I want a family. But only if I can have it with you.”