Page 13 of Sebastian.

I catch Petra’s gaze and exchange a polite nod. I wonder if she and any of the others have heard about the tumultuous encounter with Sebastian, if the whispers have already started circulating through the crowd like they always do. I don’t think Petra is one for gossip, which is one of the few positives I see in the girl, but she’s a rarity in upper-class families in that way. For many of us, secrets are worth their weight in gold, and frankly, I don’t care if anyone talks about me. As long as they keep it to themselves until after the ceremony, that is.

With a deep breath, I try to push aside my worries and focus on happiness. The scent of jasmine wafts through the air, and the soft murmur of conversations creates a comforting hum.

I can do this. Ihaveto do this.

Elise senses my apprehension and gently squeezes my hand, offering a reassuring smile. Her unwavering support gives me the strength to face whatever challenges may arise. We share a quiet moment of understanding, a connection between mother and daughter that transcends words. Now, the music begins to play, signaling the commencement of the ceremony. I send a silent plea to the universe to grant us this one day of blissful serenity. Let the focus be on love and joy, not on the cracks in our family's facade.

Placing my other hand on my son’s shoulder, I connect with both of my oldest children at once, letting love radiate through me. Andries glances down, and while there's a sheen of sweat on his forehead, I believe I'm the only one who can see how nervous he really is.

“Ready, my love?” I ask.

“I feel like I might be sick,” he confesses with a self-deprecating chuckle. “But yes, I’m ready.”

I release Elise’s hand as the seconds count down, moving closer to Andries as we prepare to make our entrance. My heart swells with pride and love for my son. Despite all the challenges that threatened his relationship, he ensured that love prevailed.

“Are you okay, Mom?” he asks, his concern for me evident, and I give him a small smile, not wanting to burden him further with my own emotional turmoil.

“Don’t worry about me, my dear,” I whisper softly. “Today is your special day, and I’ll be just fine.”

Elise gracefully departs, leaving Andries and me to share a quiet moment. Drawing strength from his supportive presence, I reflect on our time together. He has always been the peacemaker, the eldest sibling, and a wonderful son. Andries taught me how to be a mother, and I can't help but marvel at the fine young man he has become.

He takes my hand and kisses it gently, before linking his arm with mine, and my heart is so full I feel like it might burst. Love…there is so much love here. I just need to remember that, even when my husband isn’t beside me.

The music starts, and together, we begin our slow descent down the stairs and through the garden. I savor every single second. The lush greenery and fragrant blooms wait for us past this threshold, symbolizing the promise of new beginnings and the beauty of love's bloom.

I try not to think of my own wedding. I tryso hard, and, of course, fail. But I hold back the tears and keep my smile in place, and that’s all that matters.

Then we take our first steps, and every seated person turns to look. We reach the end of the aisle, and it just feels too soon, but this is it. Now I can’t stop the tears from welling up in my eyes, but they are all for my son and his marriage. Andries and I share a heartfelt hug, a tender moment between mother and son. I feel a mixture of pride, joy, and wistfulness as I release him to wait for Roxanne. I silently pray for his happiness and a bright future with his new bride.

Taking my place beside my mother in the front row, I find comfort in her presence, knowing that she, too, knows what I’m going through. She was the one who I sent to fetch Sebastian in the first place, after all, for all the good it did me. I force my attention outwards, knowing that I will want to remember every detail of the wedding.

Dan exudes a magnetic charm as he strides down the aisle, and a genuine smile dances across his handsome face. As the best man, his presence sets the tone for the procession, exuding unwavering support and camaraderie for his lifelong friend. The rest of the groomsmen, Johan included, follow suit thereafter.

Next, the bridesmaids grace the aisle, their dresses flowing in soft cascades of pastel hues. Roxanne's sister, Lili, is radiant in her happiness, her dress a delicate shade of lavender that complements her bright smile. Elise makes her way beside Lili, where she stands tall and graceful, her demeanor emanating quiet strength as she joins the bridal party. I meet her eyes, and she gives me a quick nod, as if to say, “You’re going to be okay, Mom.” Roxanne’s friends, in an array of delicate pastels reminiscent of the garden blooms, complete the enchanting picture.

Amidst the grandeur of the garden and the splendor of the ceremony, my heart aches with the absence of Sebastian. I must not be hiding my misery as well as I think I am because I feel my mother lay her hand over my two, which are clasped tightly in my lap. As always, she’s here in my time of need. Her gentle squeeze of my hand is like a lifeline, grounding me amidst the swirl of emotions.

The guests hush in eager anticipation, their eyes locked on the doorway where the soon-to-be bride will appear any second. A gasp rolls over the crowd when she does, a bouquet that mirrors the soft colors of her bridesmaids dresses clasped in her hands, and her mother, Yao, on her arm.

Roxanne glides down the aisle in her exquisite qipao dress, and despite how I feel about the woman, there is no denying that she is simply stunning. Roxanne’s beauty has always been striking, but today, her edges are softened. Yao is in an intricately detailed green qipao, but it’s Roxanne’s dress that has everyone entranced. The delicate fabric shimmers with an opalescent sheen, embracing her figure. The high collar accentuates the graceful length of her neck, while the intricate floral embroidery adorns the pristine white fabric, a symphony of delicate artistry that tells a story of love and her own heritage. Flowing sleeves add an air of elegance, lending her an almost otherworldly aura. This is the first time I’ve looked at her and seen what must have drawn Andries in like a moth to a flame. For all the drama that she’s involved our family in, Roxanne is a rare beauty, and her confidence is undeniable.

As Roxanne moves towards Andries, her steps are light and sure, as if she is floating on a cloud, radiating a sense of serenity. The soft rays of the sun caress her like a halo, illuminating her and making her blonde hair glow.

Roxanne reaches the altar, where her eyes meet Andries’s with a tender intensity. In that moment, it's as if the entire world fades away, leaving only the two of them in a world of their own. The affection between the two is palpable.

Andries has his eyes locked on Roxanne as if mesmerized by her very presence. His love for her shines brightly in his gaze, and I can see the depth of his devotion. Roxanne hands her bouquet to her mother, who sits in the front row on the side opposite to where I am, and the bride and groom join hands. It's a sight that warms my heart and reminds me of the day I walked down the aisle to meet Sebastian, united against the world, ready to face anything together.

A soft smile tugs at the corners of my lips. I can't help but reminisce about my own wedding day, the joy and excitement of beginning a new life with the man I loved. In that moment, nothing else mattered, and the world faded away as we exchanged our vows, promising to stand together through thick and thin. Such a stark change from today, where the two of us are pitted against each other, like enemies.

The ceremony proceeds, and I find myself caught in a bittersweet mix of emotions. Happiness for Andries and Roxanne, and yet, a lingering sadness over the fractured state of our own family. It’s a reminder that love, while powerful, is also delicate, and must be nurtured and cherished to flourish.

When the officiant begins to speak, I feel one last surge of adrenaline—a desperate hope that Sebastian is here somewhere, hiding in the depth of the crowd. Surely he won’t miss our son’s wedding. Not my Seb, not the man that I’ve raised children with and loved for decades. He has to be here.

I look around, knowing that if I don’t find him in the crowd, then it’s officially too late, and that there is no getting this moment back. A lump forms in my throat when I don’t find him; no matter how many times I look, even into the shadows near the house and on the balconies. They are all empty. Sebastian really didn’t come. Not even in secret. Nothing in my life has ever disappointed me like this.

God, is this really it? Could our marriage really be over due to something like this? After all these years and everything we’ve been to?

I come back to the moment when I hear the officiant say, “…the couple has written their own vows, and will speak them now, starting with the bride.”

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