Sometimes I pinch myself just to check if this is real. My life was completely different just six weeks ago, crazy right? I never imagined being so happy. I love this guy more than I ever thought possible. Along with my son, he is everything. It’s truly mind-boggling that the person I once saw as using people to get what he wanted, and my longtime school crush, turned out to be the one who loves me deeply and makes me feel whole. It’s funny how life works out sometimes.
Chapter sixty-eight
Xander
By the time we finish performing and make our way off the stage, I can feel the sweat dripping down my face and soaking through my shirt. With our final performance in Brisbane over, our Australian tour has come to an end. This country will forever leave a lasting imprint on my heart as the place where I discovered everything I ever yearned for.
Ace mentioned that I don’t have to attend the meet and greet tonight because of our flight, but I really want to. Despite all the drama in the media, my fans are still my top priority. They are the ones who have given me this incredible life. And now that it’s not just groupies in the greenroom looking for a quick fling,I genuinely enjoy engaging with those genuine fans who are excited to meet us.
Last night, Walter texted me and said his band snagged tickets to the Brisbane concert and they would all be there. I invited them to chill with us backstage in the green room after the meet and greet. I told Kit, and she made sure we had plenty of beers and food to share with everyone.
They seem like a great group of people, always laughing and supporting each other, just like our own little family. Three guys and a girl. Although, I have a suspicion there's a love triangle going on between Walter, Kyle, and Sofie, with both guys vying for her attention. We ended up chatting about music until the early hours of the morning.
I’m genuinely surprised that Theo was actually interested in leaving the groupies behind for the night in order to connect with another band. Perhaps us going out on our own could be a positive thing for Theo, encouraging him to start taking things more seriously.
As I make my way down the long hallway towards the green room, my eyes instinctively search for Poppy. Throughout the night, I found myself repeatedly looking towards the side of the stage, only to remember that she remained at the hotel, managing everything and ensuring we left nothing behind.
Kit has arranged for a car to pick me up in twenty minutes, which will then take me to the hotel and eventually to the airport. Thank God we don't have to share a ride with Reg to the airport.
The thought of finally meeting Alex is causing me to feel uneasy. Even though we’ve talked a lot, I’m kind of nervous about meeting him in person. I'm stressing about not meeting his expectations as a dad. Also, I'm scared of fucking it up. I have no clue what Poppy’s mother has told him about me. Has she portrayed me as a worthless jerk who abandoned his motherbecause I didn’t want him? One thing I know for sure is that I want a life with both of them. Throughout the years, I've realized I'm nothing without my girl, and now that I have a son, I know I'm nothing without him too.
Just before we enter the green room, my bandmates wait for me by the door. When I approach, they lift their heads. It’s strange seeing them like this because usually it’s just Ace who waits for me. It's kinda strange to see Theo and Nate waiting because they're usually in there, with Theo mainly checking out the groupies.
“What’s going on?” I say, coming to a stop in front of them.
“It’s gonna feel strange traveling to another country without you,” Theo says, and I can feel the sentimental vibes creeping in.
Damn, this is the last thing I need right now. I look at Ace, and his fake smile tells me he'll miss having me around.
“Shit, you're making it seem like I won't be back.”
“We’re just gonna miss you, man, that’s all,” Nate says.
Theo steps forward and hugs me, slapping my back in a brotherly way. “We care about you, man. We understand you gotta do your thing, and we're really happy for you. Since we might not have a chance to say goodbye later, we're saying it now.”
"Okay, but I'll be back in five days," I reply, giving him a friendly pat on the back.
“Yeah, I know. But It's gonna be different. Who am I gonna fuck around with now?”
"Hurry up, asshole, we need to say our goodbyes too," Ace urges Theo.
Theo takes a step back. “Let us know how your meeting with the little dude goes.”
“I will.”
Nate steps up and gives me a hug. “Hope it all goes well, man.”
"Thanks," I say as he breaks away from the hug. I throw Ace a glance. “Can you do me a favor and watch my guitar? I don’t want it to get damaged or lost.”
“No problem. I'll throw it in with my stuff. Don’t sweat it, it’s all good.” He studies me for a moment. “Remember when we got wasted on my old couch in the garage? Where we'd chat about having a family someday.”
I nod.
“We always said we'd be there for our kids, loving them and not messing up like our dipshit dads. And now, here you are, actually doing it, dude. You're gonna rock this whole dad thing. I'm so proud of you, man!” He reaches out his hand and pulls me into a tight, brotherly hug.
I'm getting all choked up by what Ace just said, tears and all. Hearing him say he's proud of me hits me because no one other than my mom and Poppy has ever said those words to me before.
Stepping back, I hear Nate sniffle. As I glance over, I see him wiping tears from his eyes. “I don’t want to hear shit from any of you fuckers, got it,” he warns, his eyes scanning the group.