Page 78 of Bratva Knight

Compassion flashed across her face and she moved to her knees, shuffling forward. She embraced me, burying my face into her shoulder and I cried harder. I cried so hard I could barely breathe, clutching onto her like she was my lifeline. She didn’t say anything, slowly rocking me back and forth as she ran her hands through my hair.

I don’t know how long we stayed like that for. It could have been hours. It could have been minutes. All I knew was that, at the end of it, I was so emotionally exhausted, I felt like I could pass out.

When the crying subsided, replaced with quiet sobbing, Illayana pulled back. She wiped the tears from my face with her thumbs, and it was only then that I realised she’d been crying too.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I really am.”

She gave me a half-smile. I could see in her eyes that she had more to say, but seeing me break down made her hesitant to voice it.

“Go ahead. Say what you want to say.”

She shook her head. “Don’t worry—”

“Say it, Illayana. We need to air it all out now. You’ve never let anything stop you from speaking your mind. Don’t start now. Just say it.”

She chewed on her bottom lip nervously. I nodded once in encouragement and she sighed. “I understand why you didn’t say anything in the moment. I do. But we’re supposed to be best friends, Tatiana. We’re supposed to be there for each other. To comfort one another during those hard and difficult times. The fact that you felt like you couldn’t come to me, confide in me…it hurts. You kept this huge part of your life from me. Youliedto me for years. Best friends don’t do that.”

She was right. If the situation was reversed, I’d be incredibly hurt that she kept so much from me.

“There were so many opportunities for you to open up to me. I share everything with you.Everything. And all this time, you’ve been sitting on something huge. Monumental. How am I supposed to trust you now?”

I could tell her that I would never do this again, that I’ll always be honest with her from this point forward. But she wouldn’t believe me. I’d broken her trust, and that was a hard thing to get back. I knew from experience.

I hung my head. “I don’t know where we go from here.”

Illayana was quiet for a moment. “Neither do I.”

Then she got up and left, leaving me sitting in the middle of the ring alone.

“Are you sure you want to leave?” my dad asked, standing in the doorway of my bedroom with the eyes of a concerned parent.

I nodded, stuffing the last of my clothes into my bag. After Illayana walked away, I hunted her down, desperate to fix things.

She didn’t want to see me.

Today was already a hard enough day for her. I didn’t want to add anymore to it than I already had. The best thing for me to do was leave. I wanted to be there for her. For Nikolai too. But I was afraid my presence would further upset her.

I tried texting and calling. No response. I didn’t want to make today all about me, so I told her if she wanted me there, all she had to do was tell me and I’d come straight away. Come hell or high water. And I left her in peace.

I figured I’d go back to New York and start working on some designs for my clothing line. The problem was, I didn’t have a working station. At home, I’d taken over one of the spare rooms and turned it into my “designing den”, set with an industrial table, sewing machine, mannequin, rulers, cork boards, sketch books…everything I needed to create and design my own clothes. I didn’t have anything like that in New York.

“She doesn’t want me here, Dad.”

“She’s just upset. Give her a little time to calm down and I’m sure it will all be okay.”

“That’s what I’m doing.”

“You don’t have to run thousands of miles away to do it, though. You can stay here.”

I shook my head again. “It’s better if I just go.”

He huffed, coming in to sit on the edge of my bed. He knew there was no point in arguing with me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”

“Dad, this is inno wayyour fault. The only person to blame here is me. I should have told her alongtime ago.”

He nodded thoughtfully. “I had been telling you for a while that you should just bite the bullet and tell her. Could have saved yourself a whole lot of trouble if you’d just listened to me.”

I glared and he laughed.

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